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New York, 12:04 PM
Tue Dec 1
57 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Image of Jim Topoleski Jim Topoleski
    11:43 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    its a combination of a whole lot of things.

    1) PE along with art and music is almost always the first thing to be cut. There are schools with good sports teams yet have no general PE due to budget cuts.

    2) Processed foods. Both at home and likely in the Cafeteria. With the cost of food prep skyrocketing, almost all districts use some form of a food service group and likely its bided out so the CHEAPEST group gets the bid. Well its cheap for a reason people.

    3) Parental fear mongering. Parents are WAY too fearful of everything. Basically pussyfying their children. Kids dont go outside, are not forced to be active, and sit in front of the boob tube all day. Both the medical field AND the media are as much to blame for this one.
    3a) I would also include general lazy parenting to this too. Easier to watch their kids pay their 360 than to look out a window.

    4) There is NO demand to be in shape. Being overweight is acceptable. Mind you the twist to this one is being FAT still isnt.

    And for the US the biggest factor I think in all of this is the fact that schools are given all the responsibilities of being the parent, yet have absolutely no authority or respect in BEING THE PARENT. God forbid you tell little Johnny he needs to loose the weight, the parents would have their lawyers ramming down the door with their briefcases.

    Back when I went to school which given my 10 year was this past Sat, wasnt too long ago, our teachers told it like it was. My gym teacher had EXPLICIT permission from my parents to KICK MY ASS if I got out of line. And you bet your ass he did.
     Reply
    Jim Topoleski was starred Jim Topoleski was unstarred
    Image of Colonel Mustard Colonel Mustard
    12:02 PM

    @Jim Topoleski: The only thing PE provides to kids is a school-sanctioned opportunity for the bigger, more athletic, popular kids to beat the living shit out of the unpopular kids with the full support of supervising adults.

    The only kids who burned calories in PE were the kids who were going to play intramural sports and beat up more kids after school anyway.
     Reply
    Colonel Mustard was starred Colonel Mustard was unstarred
    Image of DennyCrane DennyCrane
    11:40 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    Dad?!?!???
     Reply
    DennyCrane was starred DennyCrane was unstarred
    Image of PaisleyPajamas PaisleyPajamas
    11:39 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    I've often wondered what it would mean for future generations to learn yoga and Pilates rather than dodge ball (a game I loathed) in physical education. I like to fantasize that war would become unnecessary if respect for the human body and desire for optimum health in our culture was inched up a few notches.
     Reply
    PaisleyPajamas was starred PaisleyPajamas was unstarred
    Image of Jim Topoleski Jim Topoleski
    11:48 AM

    @PaisleyPajamas: keep dreaming. The same people who invented Yoga are the same people who are having a mini cold war with their next door neighbor using nuclear weapons
     Reply
    Jim Topoleski was starred Jim Topoleski was unstarred
    Image of PaisleyPajamas PaisleyPajamas
    11:54 AM

    @Jim Topoleski: Interesting point! I was actually commenting on American culture as dependent on a "pill to fix" and "surgery to cure" rather than the higher power of yoga. I just see the current method of teaching kids physical fitness as violent and pointless--like war!
     Reply
    PaisleyPajamas was starred PaisleyPajamas was unstarred
    Image of Buttafooco Buttafooco
    11:59 AM

    @PaisleyPajamas: we actually tried to get some of the charter schools a couple of years ago to start offering (yoga/pilates) as a form of physical education but it went on deaf ears. One principal said he mentioned it to the board and a few of them thought it was a practice that was associated with Asian cults.
     Reply
    Buttafooco was starred Buttafooco was unstarred
    Image of NoWireHangers NoWireHangers
    11:34 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    Yoga? Nutrition? Ha! None of these kids are being forced. We were forced in Illinois, the only state (maybe still) that had a Physical Education requirement for every year of school until you graduated. (Probably b/c we love deep dish pizza and hot dogs). The trauma lasts for years people. Middle school square dancing, junior high volleyball, high school co-ed swimming, all while clad in ugly ass uniforms. 1st period high school PE that fucks up your makeup and freshly curled bangs. Yearly fitness exams: they weighed you in front of your classmates! Yoga? Ha. Hahahahahaha! I'd have cut a bitch for a yoga option in 7th grade. We played Pickle Ball. Do you even know what that is?!
     Reply
    Edited by NoWireHangers at 12/01/09 11:36 AM NoWireHangers was starred NoWireHangers was unstarred
    Image of Mo MoDo Mo MoDo
    11:45 AM

    @NoWireHangers: I don't recall ever breaking a sweat in high school gym. There were always ways to avoid real exertion. Archery was our favorite unit.
     Reply
    Mo MoDo was starred Mo MoDo was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    11:53 AM

    @NoWireHangers: I'll raise you Pickle Ball and offer Pins or People. Think of Dodge Ball and Bowling. What does dodge ball have to do with bowling you ask? Well nothing, of course. Just a way for the Neo-Nazi terrorists that ran public schools to infuse a game where the object is to take a ball and glean it off the head of some child and combine it with also throwing said balls at bowling pins scattered precariously around a gymnasium making ankle-turning little land mines for the randomly running victim, panicked and stunned by mottled rubber bouncing off their cheek bones.

    Yeah.
     Reply
    Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    11:28 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    One wonders how the kids at Roly-Polytechnic are gonna take the news.
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of BowlingForDollars BowlingForDollars
    11:28 AM

    In reply to How Are We Whipping Our Kids Into Fighting Shape?
    This is what happens when school boards cut P.E. classes. Kids get fat and then the country wonders why.

    If kids are active and running around, they burn pizza and fries right off. If they are sitting around on computers and video games, then that's also a problem.
     Reply
    BowlingForDollars was starred BowlingForDollars was unstarred
    Image of GreyEminence GreyEminence
    11:33 AM

    @BowlingForDollars: I don't think mandatory P.E. classes are the answer, or at least not the sort of P.E. classes that we have now.

    When I was in high-school, I was really bookish and inactive. Forced P.E. was TORTURE for me because I didn't have much stamina and had no hand-eye coordination. Far from instilling a healthy appreciation of physical fitness, gym classes just made me hate all forms of exercise. It wasn't until I got to university and independently discovered something that I liked (triathlons) that I became more athletic. I think if we're going to force kids to be active in school, then the calisthenics and team sports of mandatory P.E. aren't the answer.
     Reply
    PaisleyPajamas promoted this comment GreyEminence was starred GreyEminence was unstarred
    Image of Go Like Hell Machine Go Like Hell Machine
    11:56 AM

    @GreyEminence: Well, but what's an acceptable alternative? While most people in previous generations hated physical education classes, you still had to do them, and previous generations were considerably fitter than their contemporary counterparts. Sometimes school needs to be as much about doing shit that you don't want to do as much as doing things you enjoy.
     Reply
    Go Like Hell Machine was starred Go Like Hell Machine was unstarred
    Image of goetz goetz
    11/25/09

    In reply to Pyro Teen Is Hieroglyphic Fiend: Zodiac Copycat Burns School While Cops Turn Fool!
    Mohammed Hassan? Oh no! Don't tell me this is another case of someone "Going Muslim"...
     Reply
    onebadclam promoted this comment goetz was starred goetz was unstarred
    Image of onebadclam onebadclam
    11/25/09

    @goetz: Prepare for "Obama now has two terrorist attacks on US soil" stories.
     Reply
    onebadclam was starred onebadclam was unstarred
    Image of goetz goetz
    11/25/09

    @onebadclam: He'd totally win the Thanksgiving Horror Story contest.
     Reply
    goetz was starred goetz was unstarred
    Image of AndPreciousLittleofThat AndPreciousLittleofThat
    11/25/09

    In reply to Pyro Teen Is Hieroglyphic Fiend: Zodiac Copycat Burns School While Cops Turn Fool!
    This sounds like a job for Encyclopedia Brown!
     Reply
    AndPreciousLittleofThat was starred AndPreciousLittleofThat was unstarred
    Image of ms_priestypants ms_priestypants
    11/25/09

    @AndPreciousLittleofThat: I was thinking it is more of a Jupiter Jones sort of thing, what with the hieroglyphics.
     Reply
    ms_priestypants was starred ms_priestypants was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/25/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    You know what slays me? How when people read about stories like this they immediately let loose with some riff on how "kids today are fucked and here's why..." I have some serious news for you: kids today are no different than from any age in which you or I come from. One of the reasons you're seeing a bumper crop of teenage witches, pre-adolescent bitches, and warlocks seemingly weened on the Grand Tit of Belligerence is because the art of parenting is dead and gone. They have joined the endangered species list. Why? Because they refuse to grow up themselves, to take the reins of parental authority they are duty-bound to grip but loath to accept because to do so ages them by implication. There is nothing "hot" about being an authority figure in their jaundiced eyes. So they try to be their kids' friends, and what you're seeing is the direct outgrowth of that approach. It is a recipe for disaster, tweaked to a T...

    Their only defense? The shit-farm we call a culture here in the United States. What are these kids nursed on when it comes to cultural values, so that no matter what good-faith effort a beleaguered parent makes, they are riding into a stiff headwind? Reality TV, Extreme Anything, and the blind hope that some day you may get to make a sex tape that is bought by TMZ. The American Dream has become a national nocturnal emission, replete with a cold and scuzzy residue that no amount of turning away will relieve.

    Or not.
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of skahammer skahammer
    11/25/09

    @TheSometimesWhy: OK, maybe I'm just dumb but I'll take your bait here: How do you know so much about parents' goals, and how often those goals include becoming their kids' "friends"?

    I would consider that statement extremely hard to substantiate -- what parent is going to admit to it? Thus you're left with what you've observed about parenting...95% of which takes place behind closed doors.

    So your statement probably has meaning only to the extent that you've shared living quarters with a large and representative sample of families. And if that's really what you're claiming you've done, then I'm quite interested to know more details.
     Reply
    skahammer was starred skahammer was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/25/09

    @skahammer: Dear Ska, There is no bait in my post. I am a witness to what I see. A blind dead guy would see as much. Without boring you with details, let's just say I "work with the public" from a vantage point that allows me to view many parents and their progeny in a situation in which that dynamic is (or at least should be) in clear focus. And what I see chills me. To say there has been a cultural abdication of the role that parenting requires is to me almost a rank understatement.

    There are too many tentacles to this octopus to go into here. The fact that a parent can't or won't admit what I observe of their behavior doesn't absolve them of it. And you may claim that the fact that I observe this behavior in them doesn't necessarily make it so, either, but I have one thing you don't--stark circumstantial evidence that nobody's home, literally and figuratively, these days when it comes to performing the tasks that a parent is charged with.

    Things like disciplining a child, socializing them, helping them understand that when they are out in public, there is a different standard of conduct they are held to, because, guess what? Society requires it. And when that standard isn't met, society is diminished. It literally unravels.

    Maybe you don't see any of the signs I am referring to. Then again, maybe you live on another planet and ride a unicorn. But because you doubt me, next time you're out and about, look around for a family that functions as it should: one where the members are loving, respectful, engaged by each other, and act like members of a group that recognizes itself by the way they act. Then maintain that vigil, and see how long it is between the time you saw the first group that met that standard and the time you noticed the second one.

    Best of luck.

    #tips
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of skahammer skahammer
    11/25/09

    @TheSometimesWhy: Okay, but it'll have to be next week -- my unicorn's in the shop.
     Reply
    skahammer was starred skahammer was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/25/09

    @skahammer: Make sure you take the extended warranty, should they offer it.

    #tips
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of skahammer skahammer
    11/25/09

    @TheSometimesWhy: Now come on, there's no need to get nasty all of a sudden.
     Reply
    Edited by skahammer at 11/25/09 2:00 PM skahammer was starred skahammer was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/25/09

    @skahammer: What? It's standard on the '09 model.

    #tips
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of It's twue! It's twue! It's twue! It's twue!
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    You see your 13 year old daughter 4 times a year? Go fuck yourself deadbeat.
     Reply
    kappakappaspankme promoted this comment It's twue! It's twue! was starred It's twue! It's twue! was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    Gertrude Stein had it right--they're all a lost generation...
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of Tremonius Tremonius
    11/24/09

    @TheSometimesWhy: Yeah, but she was meaning that mechanic's helper on the Isle de la Cite who wasn't there because of the war he'd just returned from, and that's why they're lost, according to the shop owner. They never were civilized. Civilization is a three-step process. Papa described it as Devout as choir boys, then Cynical as night club owners, then returning to Devout through Cynicism, like a loose canon. If you're in war, then you never ever doubt your early rejection of civilization. And you never see the sense of spending your day working on a strange lady's Ford.

    Everybody except Basket is over 13 in the works of Gertrude Stein.

    No, not a spelling error.
     Reply
    Tremonius was starred Tremonius was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/24/09

    @Tremonius: I concur wholeheartedly, Tremmie, but for the fact that the Gertrude Stein I was referencing was a character in an episode of the old Gomer Pyle TV show. Gomer and his buddy were off on a three-day furlough when they tried to hitch a ride into town with the Sarge. Not surprisingly, hilarity and high jinks ensued. Gertie (as she was known in that episode) was a cabaret singer at the PX on base, doling out witticisms as potent as the hooch in her glass.

    But I digress...

    I do appreciate what has to be the most literate response to something I have ever said here at Gawker. Truth to tell, you have now shamed me into going back to get my PhD, which will no doubt enable me to comprehend the full scope of your insights.

    Gracie mille!

    #tips
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of Tremonius Tremonius
    11/25/09

    @TheSometimesWhy: I sure appreciate the flattery, but neither my odd notions nor me myself are known inhabitants of any classroom. There are about five possible sources for Dialectical Doo-Wah, but really they're more endemic than acadmic, and more anemic than either.

    #tips
     Reply
    Tremonius was starred Tremonius was unstarred
    Image of TheSometimesWhy TheSometimesWhy
    11/25/09

    @Tremonius: I couldn't have said it better. Really.

    #tips
     Reply
    TheSometimesWhy was starred TheSometimesWhy was unstarred
    Image of liznieve001 liznieve001
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    Hasn't anyone caught on to the fact that this dude only sees her 4 times a year (once each season, and "two weeks in the summer"). When Dads aren't around, they become even more irrelevant (and more justifiably so) to 13-year-old girls than if they're in the house.

    If you want to be a part of your daughter's life, then actually make a sacrifice to be closer to her.
     Reply
    skahammer promoted this comment metoometoo approved this comment liznieve001 was starred liznieve001 was unstarred
    Image of skahammer skahammer
    11/25/09

    @liznieve001: I think you just advised a lot of dads to tie up the guards somehow and make their escape from prison.
     Reply
    skahammer was starred skahammer was unstarred
    Image of AngriestGeek AngriestGeek
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    Aside from normal teenage crap, she's probably acting out anger over the divorce, but if he thinks she's a problem now, "giving up" and "leaving her alone" will only result in ten times the problem in the upcoming years---though it will get a lot of middle-aged men laid as she works out her issues through college and into her 20's.
     Reply
    AngriestGeek was starred AngriestGeek was unstarred
    Image of morninggloria morninggloria
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    This girl sounds like she's got a really promising career as a cast member of Rock of Love or a high school English teacher who goes on to get caught fornicating with her students.
     Reply
    morninggloria was starred morninggloria was unstarred
    Image of skahammer skahammer
    11/25/09

    @morninggloria: I see someone's been ruminating about the road not taken, lately.
     Reply
    skahammer was starred skahammer was unstarred
    Image of deepey deepey
    11/24/09

    In reply to How to Deal With Teens
    If you follow that link, all the responses say "Oh, she's just at that difficult age!" and "Teen girls are always like that!" and "She's not capable of communicating her feelings to you right now!"

    Sorry, but no. She's just a whiny, spoiled little bitch.

    Do you really think that 13 year old girls are incapable of showing respect to their parents or acting like decent human beings? I was never like this, nor were any of my close friends at that age, nor was my sister.

    I think the real problem here is that we, as a society, raise a bunch of pouty, self-indulgent little beasts and then give them a pass because "they're just kids."
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme promoted this comment deepey was starred deepey was unstarred
    Image of Trulymadlyme Trulymadlyme
    11/24/09

    @deepey: Uh, yes. She is being an asshole and truthfully hormones or not she needs to be called on her shit. If not for her own well-being, think of the poor roommates who will be forced to deal with her bullshit.
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme was starred Trulymadlyme was unstarred
    Image of AgadorSpartacus AgadorSpartacus
    11/24/09

    @Trulymadlyme: Her roommates will probably not hold back, so if she is still a twat at 18, she will be knocked down a peg or two by her peers. Unless they're twats too, which is highly possible.
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme promoted this comment AgadorSpartacus was starred AgadorSpartacus was unstarred
    Image of pleppy pleppy
    11/24/09

    @deepey: Oh, come on. Her choice of words sucks, but the girl is 13 and sees her dad a couple of times a year.
    It's really not uncommon for girls that age to reject dad's love and/or friendship, and I'd imagine it'd be particularly hard for the girl to care what he's saying when he's not around at all. I'm betting in her 13 year old, un-nuanced mind, she thinks "really? you want to pretend you care about me, but I only see you 4 times a year? Back off jerk."
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme promoted this comment pleppy was starred pleppy was unstarred
    Image of Trulymadlyme Trulymadlyme
    11/24/09

    @pleppy: He wrote that he regularly saw her. She's being an asshole and using hate language. That shit needs to be checked.
     Reply
    Trulymadlyme was starred Trulymadlyme was unstarred
    Image of TheMac TheMac
    11/24/09

    @pleppy: Gah. I totally get the fact that some teenagers rebel solely based on the fact that they're transitioning into adulthood while the entire foundation of their childhood (parental unit) is breaking apart. I've been wild-acting-out kid.

    But even as a 13YO, I understood that my parents were my parents, and they loved me, and that there were certain things that once said could not be unsaid. I don't have the healthiest relationship with my parents today, but I still understand those things which I feel like is the thing that keeps me able to look past their flaws.

    I mean, I'm so over some of the attitudes girls/women are told are okay to have towards men from such a young age. If it's not "my father was never a real father!" than it's "my father wanted me to be his little girl forever!" I know when you're a 13YO girl, men seem like another species who have languages and agendas and ways that are foreign...that's why it's important to try to build a relationship with the one man who doesn't have a fucking agenda. Where does she get off (in her little ignorant and immature way) questioning her father's masculinity? Cause that's what the "that's gay" stuff is about, right- "you're not a man!" Fuck that. Like she would know the first thing about losing your home and marriage and half your paycheck to people who may never love you ever again.

    I know some parents suck and I don't think people should just sweep that under the rug, but I feel like this whole teen-adult generation has this attitude like, it's parents jobs to ensure that they make their kids happy enough to not want to cut them off when they're 21. Like, almost every other person I know is estranged from one of their parents. And I wonder how these people would feel when they're 45 and parents themselves and want to connect their kids to grandma and grandpa, and Papa was like, "eh, no thanks..."
     Reply
    TheMac was starred TheMac was unstarred
    Image of deepey deepey
    11/24/09

    @pleppy: I would agree, except that it seems (from this letter at least) that he's not "pretending" to care - he seems genuinely hurt and unsure of how to proceed. Hence, her dismissive behavior makes her sound like a twat.

    That's not to say she'll never outgrow it, or that this particular case doesn't have some extenuating circumstances we don't know about...I just think that our society is generally to accepting of inconsiderate, disrespectful and selfish behavior from children (who then turn into inconsiderate, disrespectful and selfish adults - or at least, they often do).
     Reply
    Edited by deepey at 11/24/09 5:45 PM deepey was starred deepey was unstarred
    Image of thursdaynext27 thursdaynext27
    11/24/09

    @Trulymadlyme: The first sentence in the letter: "My children live several hours away. I drive to see them for a weekend in the spring, fall and winter, and in the summer, they visit me for two weeks."

    2 weeks + 3 weekends + living several hours away [not =] regularly seeing them. There are clearly some issues in this family we're not aware of and it's too easy to assume it's all her fault.

    Can he see them more often, thus reducing the need for this long distance relationship? Can the parents sit down with her together and talk this out--and listen to her? Bring in a neutral party like a family counselor? Does he understand that some teens do not appreciate parents showing up in their social/communication space, that they seem pathetic when they think they are hip?

    The fact is she's 13 and dealing with divorce. Why does the responsibility to being the adult fall to her?
     Reply
    thursdaynext27 was starred thursdaynext27 was unstarred
    Image of Better to Eat You With Better to Eat You With
    11/24/09

    @thursdaynext27: The "I drive to see them" smacks of a persecution complex, too. Why not just say that he sees them? Because he wants to be congratulated for the effort. He probably bitches/will bitch to all his friends and coworkers about how his ex and kids are bankrupting him via his child support obligations, too.
     Reply
    kappakappaspankme promoted this comment Better to Eat You With was starred Better to Eat You With was unstarred
    Image of kappakappaspankme kappakappaspankme
    11/25/09

    @Better to Eat You With: FACT: That dreadful, beast of a daughter is far better off without a tosser of a father like this guy.

    He has to drive to see his damn kid. Boo hoo. And when she refuses to blow bubbles at him and allow him to treat her poorly, he takes to the internet to whine about it. Publicly.

    Stand up fellow the dad is, all right.

    Tween daughter should be tonguelashed for resorting to calling her father ghey because not only is it disgusting to use ghey as an epithet but it's mind-numbingly uncreative. Father needs to be slapped upside the head with a sock full of common sense and stop acting like the phucking child in that relationship.

    Damn - parenting isn't an easy job but people have a way of making it a lot harder than it has to be.

    /rant
     Reply
    kappakappaspankme was starred kappakappaspankme was unstarred
    Image of Wrapitup Wrapitup
    11/25/09

    @kappakappaspankme: You said it.
     Reply
    Wrapitup was starred Wrapitup was unstarred
    Image of Better to Eat You With Better to Eat You With
    11/25/09

    @kappakappaspankme: Absolutely, on all points, especially the last one.
     Reply
    Better to Eat You With was starred Better to Eat You With was unstarred
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