Quin Hillyer is a white male conservative who writes for National Review. So? Does he not have the same rights as anyone else? The right to call a woman a slut, and to deploy racial slurs as he deems necessary?

The more I read the news on my web-enabled smartphone, the more it becomes clear to me that there are precisely four words that must be banished from the English language. Why four? My column doesn't have space for more than that.

I love Busta Rhymes on musical type of level but let's all recognize and realize that Busta Rhymes tends to give interviews where he just says different levels of words out of his mouth that go together to form the types of sentences that do not mean anything on the level of reality, okay? HuffPo has the scoop:

Kids these days: what the hell are they? That is the question that faces American time-wasters today. As you know, the latest generation with a formal name is "The Millennials," and they are basically the worst, continuing the grand tradition of every new generation being the worst.

"Artisan." Remember the word "artisan?" Perfectly valid word. Described an actual type of thing. Until the ad world got ahold of it, put it on the street, and pimped it out until every last chemical food concoction assembled by robots out of petroleum byproducts was marketed as "artisan." Totally killed the word.…

For 85 years, the FBI has defined rape as the "carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and against her will." In all that time, no men have been raped. Now, thanks to rap music, homosexual marriage, and Jerry Sandusky, the FBI has gone and changed the definition—placing millions of American men in danger of rape.

Where did Hunter S. Thompson get the word "gonzo?" The accepted story's always been that it was a bit of Boston slang that a Boston newspaper editor first hung on Thompson. But—suck it Boston—that may be a myth!

After its executives were forced to listen to a US senator read the words "shitty deal" from a company email one million times, Goldman Sachs has decided to ban swearing via email. Whatever shall they do now?

New York lawmakers are considering a proposal to change the name of the state's Office of Mental Retardation and Developmental Disabilities to something without the word "Retardation" in it. Unintended consequence alert: Could New York lose its reputation for surliness?

The thoroughly unwarranted level of interest in finding word to replace "hipster" has reached a fever pitch! We gave you 20 options to choose from. The top five vote-getters are below. This vote will determine everything. So, vote.

You hipsters really came through. We asked for a new slur to replace "hipster," and nearly a thousand of you (presumably unemployed) commenters made suggestions. Jesus. We've narrowed it down to 20. Cast your vote below.

Okay. Yes. We said we were going to ban the god damn word "hipster," but we have lapsed. Mea culpa, and shit. The real problem is that there's not a pithy replacement word. That's where you come in.

When I read that this year's Oxford University Press Word of the Year is "unfriend" I began typing a post about interpersonal relations on the Internet. Then I realized that the Word of the Year is a huge scam.