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New York, 5:48 PM
Sat Nov 21
19 posts in the last 24 hours
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11/20/09
11/20/09
However, inevitably, the sun will explode and turn Earth into a cinder. Any fragment of humanity that might have existed will be vaporized. All that will remain will be some vestigial Voyager-like exploration spacecraft and radio signals that get asymptotically weaker with each light year they travel.
So really, Umberto Eco's reasons why lists provide us with an illusion of order in nature and immortality are the same reasons we watch "Sex Rehab w/ Dr. Drew" or listen to Kendra Jade ride the Sybian; because we are witnessing what will certainly be the last evidence of humanity. And the gravity of that is undeniable.
11/20/09
11/20/09
#tips
11/20/09
15 Power Foods That Fight Fat!
10 Fantastic Beauty Tips From Around the World!
5 Ab Moves That Really Work!
1 Way to Convince Yourself That Life Isn't a Great Big Chaotic Mess, Despite All Evidence to the Contrary!
11/20/09
11/20/09
Is there really some rube out there doing the "180 degree backwards standing ab fold spine breaking crunch"?
11/20/09
11/20/09
1) have myself a real good time
2) float around in ecstasy
3) be shooting star leaping through the skies
4) defy laws of gravity (like a tiger)
5) be a racing car passing by (like Lady Godiva)
6) go go go
7) burn through skies
8) YEAH! (note: two hundred degrees)
9) travel at speed of light
10) make a supersonic man out of you
11/20/09
1) to laugh
2) to sing
3) everything
4) to move
5) to groove
6) the loving things
11/20/09
11/20/09
11/20/09
11/20/09
10:00 AM
11/20/09
1) Get plague booster shot
2) Ravish maiden
3) Fire full-time serfs; go to work-for- hire model
4) Ravish maiden
5) Challenge Oldo of Omvaria to a joust
6) Cancel joust
7) Write checks to serfs
8) Forget to make bank deposit
9) Kill serfs
10) Ravish maiden
11/20/09
1. Vacation on the Isle of Cyprus!
2. Decide the Crusades are stoopid.
3. Have strategically "diplomatic" dinner with Pope Boniface VIII, laugh at his lame jokes
4. Piss off the King of France
5. Get arrested, get tortured GITMO-style, get forced to admit that the Knights Templar are an order of devil-worshiping homosexuals.
6. Defiantly recant aforementioned statements in open trial.
7. REALLLLY piss off both the Pope and the king of France.
7. Get burned at the stake.
8. (Epilogue) When the head of French King Louis XVI was severed by the guillotine during the French Revolution, an anonymous person reportedly jumped on the gallows and shouted, "Jacques de Molay is avenged!"
11/20/09
11/20/09
11/20/09
11/20/09
I've worked with, and against, depression for the past decade, and apart from medication and CBT work, the biggest thing keeping my life on track is the little 3x5 card I keep in my pocket with all my to-do stuff. I re-write the card every night and carry over the stuff I haven't done yet. It's helped immensely, and the satisfaction of checking a thing off the list is a great feeling.
Thanks, Umberto!
11/16/09
11/16/09
That kid in the picture quit smoking. Today?
(apologies, it [my mac? firefox? gawker?] won't let me upload the photo from my desktop.) #cigarettes
11/16/09
11/16/09
No, but seriously, I'm glad I can saunter around campus with my cigarette looking super cool and annoying the hell out of all the tour groups and parents behind me.
11/16/09
Put me in coach on a plane, or on a crowded subway or elevator or, hell, just sharing a sidewalk, with the skinny-assed smoker as opposed to the person taking up the physical space for two or even three of us!
There, I said it--now I'm sure I'm gonna get smacked around for it--so bring it! #cigarettes
11/16/09
11/16/09
What about us fat, hard-drinking smokers? #cigarettes
11/16/09
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11/16/09
'Cause when recently house hunting I walked into a home of two older folks who were both chainsmoking simultaneously. Okay. But their house smelled like shit covered tobacco. No, seriously. It smelled like there was a huge load in the front hall covered with cigarette ash that was smashed and smeared into every exposed surface that existed. These people were literally living in a noxious pit of cancer coated fog, and I was beyond pissed that my clothes smelled like impending emphysema after leaving.
So, yeah, what the hell is the resale value on a house made of tar? #cigarettes
11/16/09
11/16/09
11/16/09
11/16/09
11/16/09
My apartment (in which my boyfriend and I both smoke) surely reeks, but we're pretty much conditioned not to notice it. It's sort of like how you rarely notice how your own pets smell, but other people's pets invariably stink... #cigarettes
11/16/09
Sooo, flossy, I guess it's all cool, unless you intend to have guests over and since there's no litter box to clean, you just turn up the glade plug in, burn a little patchouli incense and create the essence of tobacco roses and singed monkey butt to mask the smell of spoiled carcinogens. To hell with you Martha Stewart and your potpourri globes! We've got burnt hair and car emissions! (Heh. I kid.) #cigarettes
11/16/09
11/16/09
Now, I don't. Cigarette smoke now triggers my migraines.
It's been ten years -- but I still have dreams....where I'm walking down the street, lighting one delicious Malboro Light after another, and smoking and smoking and smoking... #cigarettes
11/16/09
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11/16/09
However, the sidewalk outside? That's fucking ridiculous.