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rants
Lou Dobbs Is Useless in a Crisis
Lou Dobbs was once a reasonably well respected financial journalist before he traded in his green visor for a pitchfork and a white sheet. And now he's missing-in-action during the biggest financial story of his lifetime. More » -
crossovers
From Hedge Fund Lord To Part-Time Reporter
Ron Insana left CNBC three years ago to run a hedge fund. Like Lou Dobbs and Steven Rattner before him, he learned that actually succeeding in business is not as easy as covering success in business. So now he's begged a part-time reporting job from his old bosses. At least he'll be able to share his Wall-Street-insider wisdom with viewers. Just like Jim Cramer! More » -
gossip roundup
Michael Phelps' Love Life Involves Barbara Walters
- Michael Phelps is dating Barbara Walters' assistant "Marina," with whom he went to college. Wait, that's a fake name right?? Is someone playing a trick on poor old Cindy Adams? [Cindy Adams]
- What pairs well with xenophobia and shouting? Jay McInerney knows! At Benoit, "McInerney and his wife, Anne Hearst, had to calm down political commentator Robert Zimmerman, who'd just had a fierce on-air tangle with Lou Dobbs. Jay prescribed Zimmerman a bottle of 1991 Côte-Rôtie La Turque Domaine Guigal." Frog-loving traitors, all of them. [R&M, second-to-last item]
- Good Morning America defeated Today to score a live Britney Spears performance, leaving NBC suits "fuming," according to the NBC News-haters at the Post. Meanwhile, the singer is sane and cognizant enough to be terrified she's bungled one court case so badly she may go to jail. Her handlers take this as a positive sign!
- Alec Baldwin loved (second item) Sarah Palin's behavior off camera at Saturday Night Live, but Chevy Chase was less charitable about what she did on-camera: "She cannot improvise herself out of a paper bag."
- Elizabeth Taylor, 76, likes to be wheeled into a West Hollywood gay bar, where she drinks tequila shots and Apple martinis. They call them the golden years for a reason, people. [P6]
- Sean Penn is Venezuela, just hanging out, committing some light treason. [P6]
- Tom Cruise is a huge Tina Turner fan. In a very straight way, of course. [P6]
- Breaking: David Geffen still hates the Clintons. "They are vindictive, and people were afraid of being excluded." [R&M, third item]
- Sting's wife said she totally called the Madonna-Guy Ritchie divorce. She also allowed it to happen, by introducing the couple. So, uh, nice work, detective. Gwyneth Paltrow, meanwhile, is behaving like a real well-publicized celebrity friend.
- No one, and I mean no one, pisses in Shannon Doherty's bathroom unless her name is freaking Shannon Doherty. And don't ever forget it! [Daily Star]
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shouting heads
Lou Dobbs: The Last Unbiased Journalist in America
Here's Lou Dobbs, CNN immigrant-hater, complaining about how the entirety of the press—besides him!—is totally, completely in bed with Barack Obama. He's right, of course. Except that the media attention is so self-defeating, twisted, and unhelpful that it's facile to paint it as a neat little example of liberal bias. Also what the hell is he still doing on CNN? Everyone else on the network seems embarrassed to be associated with him. Him and Jack Cafferty should have a show together. A Broadway show! Because then we would never see it. -
groundhog daily show
'Times' Shock: Everyone Still Getting Their News From The Daily Show
Did you read Sunday's Times piece about how people are getting their news from Jon Stewart these days? Because I sure as heck didn't! I don't need the Times to tell me to stop reading the Times and turn on my cable box — mainly because I was pretty sure I had read that same exact story in the Times before. But this morning, as the story was still carrying the top of the "Most Emailed List," I decided to go find that old Times story I remembered. Well, it wasn't easy. There are 102 stories listed in "Past coverage" of Jon Stewart (the original Michael Phelps!), about nine of which employ the phrase "get their news from." And yet I could not for the life of me find the one I remembered actually reading. Turns out it is because, like the former "young people" who started this whole "getting news from the Daily Show" trend, I am now very very very old… More » -
homes of the rich and famous
Lou Dobbs' Country Estate
It's a pattern if not a rule in politics: the more populist the politician, the more lavish the personal lifestyle. John Edwards—son of a millworker and champion of the other, forgotten America—has the most valuable home in the North Carolina county in which he lives. Since cable news has become an extension of politics, it should be no surprise that a news anchor can maintain a double life. CNN's puffy-faced Poujadist, Lou Dobbs, saved his TV career by channeling the anger of America's redundant middle-aged white men. And yet Idaho-bred Dobbs' lavish home outside New York qualifies him as a member of the overclass against which he rails. It's one thing to wade through the property documents; but here are satellite photographs which show the driveway leading up to Dobbs' country house on Wantage's Quarry Road, the swimming pool and tennis court, and the vast hatched lawn that surrounds the compound. The image isn't detailed enough to show the cars in the driveway, but it's safe to assume that one of them is Dobbs' un-American Aston Martin. More » -
endorsement
Lou Dobbs For Governor
CNN shouter Lou Dobbs is apparently "mulling a run for New Jersey governor." Oh, please let that be true! Current governor Jon Corzine is quite unpopular and "Republican officials" claim the oddly orange-hued pseudo-populist pundit is "taking steps toward running" for that prestigious office himself. We cannot think of a better idea! For so many reasons! More » -
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print is dead
News Jobs Being Outsourced to India
You know all those media pundits who say it's no biggie that every time you call a helpline to complain about pretty much any product or service your call gets zapped to India where you get to talk in circles with a person who couldn't care less about your stupid American problems and thinks that calling you by your first name at the end of every sentence will cover up their condescending attitude? Well, they'll be changing their tune in a jiffy. "Local newspaper publisher Newsquest has told prepress staff at some of its titles that their jobs will be outsourced to India." More » -
april fool's day
Buy This Magical Lou Dobbs Tortilla Before It Is Deported
This EBay listing would so be worth the $100 minimum bid if real, but clearly God did not scorch Lou Dobbs' image into a tortilla manufactured in New Jersey and purchased in Bushwick. Points to the April-Fools-Day-inspired poster for noting that the immigrant-bashing CNN anchor, unlike the tortilla, "contains trace amounts of Trans Fat, and yes on Cholesterol and Fats." Also, greater than trace amounts of xenophobia. Larger images after the jump. More » -
advertising
The Power Of The Spoken Word
This ad for Pringles Hot & Spicy (click to enlarge) features a classic, un-retouched photo of a young Lou Dobbs strapped to a balloon. [via Copyranter] -
shouting heads
Lou Dobbs Almost Calls Condi Rice "Cotton-Pickin'"
There's nothing wrong, obviously, with saying "cotton-pickin'" when you are, say, Yosemite Sam. But "one cotton-pickin' minute," while best avoided, is still less of a faux-pas than saying how you're sick of "cotton-pickin'" black people telling you how you can and cannot talk about race, which is more or less what baby-headed CNN anchor Lou Dobbs said on the air the other day. The occasion? Condoleezza Rice said something rather mild about how the United States has a racial "birth defect" on account of how the nation was founded on the backs of African slave labor and it took a while to get all that sorted out. But Dobbs is sick of people telling him to stop being so racist! "We've got to be able to talk about it," he sputters in the attached clip, "and I can guarantee you this, not a single one of these cotton—just ridiculous politicians should be the moderator on the issue of race." Good thing you caught yourself there, Lou! Thankfully, the CNN transcript omits the almost-gaffe completely, so it's like it never happened! Except for that YouTube clip we've embedded below.
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lou dobbs
Film Promises to Jerk Jerk's Tears
Under the Same Moon is, we're told, "a heart-warming tale of a Mexican immigrant mom working as a domestic in Los Angeles, and her Mexico-residing son from whom she's separated." It will open in limited release in April, and apparently the attached commercial for it is airing today on CNN. CNN specifically because the three review quotes pulled for the trailer all claim the film would have a profound emotional effect on Lou Dobbs, the noted Xenophobic scumbag. Of course, a cute Mexican kid would not actually have any effect on Lou Dobbs whatsoever. He would only cry if you took away his millions of dollars, or possibly his daughter's pony. Trailer below. More » -
broken borders
Geraldo Trashes Lou Dobbs on 'The View'
Mustachioed embarrassment to the profession of journalism Geraldo Rivera appeared on The View today, where he castigated fellow blowhard Lou Dobbs for the sorts of things we have regularly attacked him for, but it was Geraldo saying it so we all felt a bit silly. Of course, Geraldo works for noted reasoned advocates of humane, sensible immigration reform Fox News, so this is really just another salvo in the tiresome Fox News vs. CNN (and sometimes NBC) battle. The clip is attached below. More » -
lou dobbs
Hillary Dobbs' Immigrant Pony Destroying American Careers
CNN host Lou Dobbs' daughter Hillary is a Harvard sophomore and, if she keeps winning events, an Olympic horse rider. She and her mare Corlett just won their "second consecutive [Winter Equestrian Festival] Challenge Cup Series title," meaning they have collectively deprived other horse-riding plutocrats of a total $60,000 in prize money and untold sums in horsey endorsement opportunities. In a few days, Dobbs will begin Olympic selection trials, where she hopes to shut out other competitors to become, at 19, one of the youngest Olympic riders ever. Corlett, outrageously, is a German-bred horse, and at just 11 years old she probably isn't even a documented immigrant laborer. At some point, after she's done stealing the jobs of real All American ponies, Corlett is going to get old and useless, and then what? I suppose she'll want to collect unemployment, or welfare or, worse yet, just live off the charity of grandaddy Lou. Of course Corlett is destined for the glue factory instead, as evidenced by the following video in which Dobbs reminds us of how immigrants are ruining America: More » -
conspiracies
Lou Dobbs Will Save America From the Mexi-Canadian Highway of Doom
The US government would maybe like to spruce up the network of existing interstates that runs from Texas to our Canadian border. The state of Texas, meanwhile, is looking into constructing a multi-lane freeway that would stretch from Laredo, on the Mexican border, to Arkansas. Naturally, this means that the American government has sold us out to foreign interests, dissolved our sovereignty, and allowed the shadowy "North American Union" to begin work on a vast "NAFTA Superhighway"—several football fields wide!—that would destroy our borders, and our rights, for good. This conspiracy theory, quite popular among the more extreme cranks of the far-right and libertarian movements, was brought to our attention by the tireless work promoting it done by respected economic commentator Lou Dobbs, of CNN.
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border patrol
Lou Dobbs Defends The Working Man At Ironic Locale
Kind of the most astounding lede we've read this week: "So I was having lunch at the Four Seasons with Lou Dobbs the other day, locked in disagreement over who cared more about working people, him or me." (The answer? Lou Dobbs is not swayed by reasoned arguments or civil discussion, demonstrates no interest in workable solutions to problems he identifies for the purposes of who've made him an unlikely TV star.) [NYT] -
the chart
The Political Leanings Of America's Anchors
Harris Poll asked TV viewers, both Democrat and Republican, to name their favorite and least liked news personalities. The results of the survey, crunched and displayed on our chart, are fascinating.- 1. Katie Couric, at the extreme left of our chart, is so heavily disliked by Republican viewers that the new CBS anchor might as well be a communist.
- 2. By calculating the balance of Democratic and Republican opinion, we arrayed the anchors across the political spectrum: nearly two-thirds of the anchors slant left, at least in respondents minds; but the right-wing anchors of Fox News are the most polarizing.
- 3. Viewers are surprisingly indifferent to Lou Dobbs: I would have thought the CNN anchor's anti-immigration stance would have won him more conservative fans.
- 4. Disliked by all political tribes: CNN's diaper-wearing Larry King; oh-so-serious Wolf Blitzer; Fox's token liberal, Alan Colmes; CNN's graceless Nancy Grace and Scientologist Greta Van Susteren.
- 5. All things to all people: ABC nightly news anchor Charlie Gibson; NBC's Brian Williams; and, surprisingly, CNN's silver fox, Anderson Cooper. (Better not let the social conservatives know that he likes Latin men!)
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stone cold crazy
Jonathan Lee Riches Will Sue You For Calling Him Crazy
Earlier this month, a $150 million lawsuit was filed against Time Warner and AOL, with some stunning charges: Credit card fraud, civil rights violations, and discrimination towards people with "bowel problems." Why haven't you heard of this scandal? Probably the same reason you haven't heard of the other recent lawsuits against Martha Stewart, Brad Pitt, Jake Gyllenhaal, George Clooney, Padma Lakshmi, Anderson Cooper, Oprah Winfrey, Slobodan Milosevic, Mumia Abu-Jamal, Lemony Snicket, the Sarbanes-Oxley Act, and Mack's Famous Boardwalk Pizza: They were all filed by Jonathan Lee Riches, the most suing-est federal prisoner you ever could hope to meet! Just this month, Riches has filed hundreds of suits against the most famous people, places, and things in the world. And he has some VERY serious complaints. More » -
border patrol
Lou Dobbs Too Busy Explaining How Country Should Be Run To Run Country
Orange-headed TV scumbag Lou Dobbs will not run for President. Because the Harvard-educated man of the people doesn't really want to spend too much time with those people. "I'm too impatient with the blathering fools who make up the crowd that attends the political process," he tells TVNewser. Also personally offensive to the only guy looking out for the working man: "standing there at chicken dinners, talking about all the things that really don't matter." Let Lou Dobbs eat his chicken dinner in peace, people! The man is hungry. Hungry for change! (And chicken.) [TVNewser] -
border patrol
Rumors Of Lou Dobbs' Sense Of Humor Have Been Greatly Exaggerated
The "interview with Lou Dobbs" Stephen Colbert carried out last night as his own Spanish-speaking alter ego? It was edited together from a year-old Dobbs interview. Appropriate ex post facto updates are to be found at HuffPo and TVNewser. -
crazies
CNN Continues Selling What's Left Of Its Soul To Lou Dobbs
Lou Dobbs took over two hours of prime CNN time last night (while they were supposed to be reporting the results from the Michigan primaries, no less!) to plug his book about how only he has the answer to what ails America. What ails America, by the way, is Mexicans taking our jobs here and Chinese people taking our jobs elsewhere (then sending us back POISON TOYS). The entire spectacle exposed the uneasy position Dobbs has at The Most Trusted Name in News. The first hour, as usual, was given over, mostly, to "real" news about politics and Michigan. The second was mostly free-wheeling opinionated shouty interviews with a panel made up of Bill Bennett some folks Dobbs ignored entirely. As other networks broadcast early returns from Michigan, Dobbs appeared aggravated when he had to jump to Wolf Blitzer with actual "news" on the close Romney/McCain race. Wolf looked uncomfortable when his fellow Election Night coverage marquee anchor star referred to the Democratic Party's "screwing over" of the voters of Michigan. "That's one way to look at it," Wolf charitably mumbled through his beard. More » -
almost hair
"Live Free or Dye"
Oh God, Lou Dobbs hair is insane on CNN. Just a few weeks ago it was almost a Cooperian grey. Tonight, molasses brown. -
rants
Lou Dobbs: Scumbag
Last week, Dorothy Thompson's 1941 essay "Who Goes Nazi?" was made available to non-subscribers at Harpers.org. The hook: "It is an interesting and somewhat macabre parlor game to play at a large gathering of one's acquaintances: to speculate who in a showdown would go Nazi. By now, I think I know." We haven't "gone through the experience many times," as Dorothy had, but a couple media figures are so obviously jonesing for a bit of totalitarianism that anyone can see they'd fit in just swell at an old fashioned putsch. Like lovable old CNN anchor Lou Dobbs.
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nauseating rumors
Lou Dobbs Ponders A Presidential Bid
Immigrant-hating/loving CNN goblin Lou Dobbs isn't not pondering entering the 2008 Presidential Elections as an independent. From the WSJ: "Mr. Dobbs says he isn't planning to run. "I haven't got the personality or nature to be a politician," he said in an interview Thursday. But he makes clear he hasn't ruled out the idea. "I cannot say never," he said." Sure you can! Just say it please and stop giving us agita! -
blind items
Name That Childish CNN Anchor
According to her HuffPo bio, "Linda Keenan worked 7 years as a head writer/senior producer for various programs on CNN. Before that, she worked as a writer/producer for Bloomberg TV." Now she's a mommyblogger. Which makes her more than qualified to present a series of amusing blind items about childish behavior by famous television newsanchors. After the jump, we solicit your guesses and present a couple of ours. More » -
sensationalist headlines
Lou Dobbs' Daughter In 'Apparently Kinda Lezzy' Facebook Shocker
Hillary Dobbs, the Lou Dobbs-faced daughter of CNN xenophobe Lou Dobbs, won't be our Facebook friend but some of her friends will! One of them sent us this photograph of la petite Dobbs in a Sapphic embrace with one of her hard-partying friends, no doubt at some dive bar near the little school in Boston which she attends. -
harvard brats
Lou Dobbs' Spawn Goes To A Little School In Boston
Both a recent Page Six item and the Times' piece on the Hampton Classic horse show yesterday made heavy mention of CNN ranter Lou Dobb's daughter, Hillary, and her enrollment in a little school in Boston which was founded in 1636. As per Page Six, after winning $12,900 in prize money at the Classic (the girl loves to ride stallions!), Daddy Dobbs had something to say! More » -
cnn vs. nyt
Lou Dobbs To Find A Leprosy Expert Who Doesn't Hate Black People
So remember that Times column yesterday that basically came out and said CNN populist and honorary Minuteman Lou Dobbs was basically full of misinformation and deliberate inaccuracies? Well, CNN wasn't exactly pleased. More » -
surprising buried news
Lou Dobbs Loves White Supremacists, Hates Imaginary Lepers
Deep at the bottom of David Leonhardt's "Economix" column in the New York Times today comes some shocking news about Lou Dobbs, crusader against immigration and CNN's great white hope to capture a slice of the Bill O'Reilly yahoo demographic: He sometimes plays fast and loose with the facts. Let's boil it down—after all, there's little point in reading the actual column, as it's written upside-down and backwards. More » -
remainders
Lindsay Lohan Does Downmarket
- Lindsay Lohan to attend Costume Institute Gala as guest of... Bally! [Fashionista] More »
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contrived meritocracy as ideological state apparatus
But Can Sanjaya Balance Traditional Strategies With Cutting-Edge Arbitrage Opportunities?
In the Wall Street Journal Weekend Edition, Karen Richardson has a wonderful story about World's Second Richest Person Warren Buffet — he's a bit like John the Baptist to Bill Gate's Jesus — and how he's cutely put out an A.P.B. for a man (yes, MAN; let's not kid ourselves) to replace him as Berkshire Hathaway's Chief Investment Officer. You can imagine the meta-narrative all this fits into:Now, the résumés are flooding in — and the process is turning out to be every bit as unconventional as the billionaire investor himself. Among the 600 or so applicants so far: a Talmudic scholar who picks stocks from home, a Canadian economist with an intense yoga practice and even a four-year-old.
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lou dobbs
Someone Get Us The Number Of Lou Dobbs' Dealer
What happened was we lost it in the copyediting fields of CNN, man. They never gave us a chance. More » -
media
Media Bubble: Arms Race
- How long will Sumner Redstone hold on to Midway games? Hopefully, long enough to give us a few more Photoshopped pieces like the one above. [NYT] More »
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judith miller
Judith Miller Did It For You, the Little People
When two world famous journalists sit down for a chat, you can expect some hard-hitting questions and take-no-prisoners grilling — and Lou Dobbs, interviewing Judith Miller last night, didn't disappoint: More » -
judith miller
In Two Hours, Prepare To Be Obfuscated
Judith Miller will be on "Lou Dobbs Tonight" at 6:40 p.m. EST to promote her new book, titled Redacted and made up of 150 blank pages. More » -
debi dobbs
Debi Dobbs
News just out: The wife of Lou Dobbs, the CNN Moneyline host, was arrested yesterday at Newark airport for carrying a loaded gun in her handbag. She must have paid too much attention to her husband's call for war against the Islamists. More »
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