gossip roundup

Tabloids Probe Bale's "Deeply Troubled" Childhood

• In the wake of his big, possibly violent fight with his mom and sister, everyone's trying to figure out what ever happened to Christian Bale. The Daily Mail notes that after Bale became the family breadwinner at 13, his father tried to make him into a Hollywood star while Mom advocated a normal childhood in Britain. Also, he's been angry all the time since forever. The Post passes along the news that he hates press tours and is known as "robo-actor" because of his "steely focus."
• Silda and Eliot Spitzer "made only two seconds of eye contact during dinner" at Gabriel's. [P6]
• Anna Wintour is basically holding the Bill Blass fashion label together with he sweet talking and so forth. I guess in some circles she's known for that? Odd. [Post]
• Was Madonna's brother's nasty tell-all book about Madonna published by a secret cabal that includes... MADONNA HERSELF?? From what I've read of that book, she's just devious enough to try it. [P6]
• The entire celebrity media convinced themselves that Lindsay Lohan was sideswiped by a motorcycle while on foot outside a club. But apparently that was entirely fabricated, presumably by a very unambitious prankster. Also, she and Samantha Ronson were headed to Boston the other night instead of breaking up forever.
• Wham! might reunite. Because what would those songs be without Andrew Ridgeley... standing there... smiling? [Sun]
• Charlie Sheen wants full custody of his daughters after batting down apparently false molestation charges from Denise Richards. Please don't say a divorce can't get any uglier than this, because then it totally will. [Sun]
• Ha ha, try dodging the Post and they'll take a picture of you without your shirt on, even if you are some big shot Catholic who totally bro'd down with Anne Hathaway's ex. [Post]
• Mario Lopez's biceps are replacing not one but both Extra hosts. [Post]
• LA boutique Kitson has dropped Lauren Conrad's collection due to poor sales. [OK!]

After seeing actor and Dancing With the Stars champion Mario Lopez's current shirtless TV Guide cover (at left) and recent People magazine spread, we couldn't help but wonder: just how shirtless is Mario Lopez? We decided we'd compare him to other popular be-pec'ed celebrities — perpetually half-nude actor Matthew McConaughey and dancer/romancer Justin Timberlake, for example — by having our esteemed assistant Nicola conduct a Google image search in the hopes of attaining some sort of shirtlessness ratio. Our results proved our suspicions: 13 of the top 20 results for a Google image search for Lopez's name come up with shirtless pics— or 65%. Thus making Mario Lopez the Most Shirtless Man in America. Consult the above Shirtlessness Index to see how other abdominal Adonises measure up to Mr. Lopez, plus find some special shirtless surprises after the jump. More »

gossip roundup

Sheen Slur May Offend Veteran Best Man

• Charlie Sheen is sorry to black people for calling his ex-wife Denise Richards a "f—king n—--r." He's especially sorry to "Tony Todd, an African-American, who was my best man at my first two weddings." Ha! Richards, with whom Sheen has been bitterly feuding, doesn't get an apology, and can presumably just "f—king" deal. [Us]
• Yesterday, everyone was worried fashiongay Andre Leon Talley would ruin Michelle Obama by putting her in a bolero jacket or some other atrocious thing. He hasn't done that yet. Instead, the Vogue editor-at-large introduced the would-be first lady at a fashion-industry fundraiser while he was wearing "a kind of turban that recalled the much-discussed costume [Barack Obama] once wore in Somalia." No one should have a problem with Obama hanging out with what looks like a gay muslim, even an elitist gay fashion muslim in New York, so obviously no one, anywhere, will. [R&M]
• Not only did Anne Hathaway break up with her scuzzy Italian boyfriend, she also moved out. Yay! But what's this business about dinner at Cipriani? [P6]
• Relentlessly cranky novelist Tom Wolfe demanded to know why a developer insinuated he was anti-Semitic. OK, this time he might have a legitimate reason to be cranky. [P6]
• Broadway and former TV star Mario Lopez is being named People's "Hottest Bachelor," but he's still totally getting evicted from his Broadway theater to make way for Katie Holmes. The guy's biceps can't catch a break.
• Supposedly Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt just bought a $10,000 stash of guns, including "two Benelli semiautomatic M4 tactical shotguns, two Wilson close quarter combat .45-caliber pistols and one Scout semiautomatic rifle." Suddenly, I'm kind of interested in seeing them in front of some reality television cameras again. Near other reality television stars. While drunk and angry. [The Superficial]
• So sad: Freeloading music critics get free drinks, but no free food, at a listening party. They stormed out in a huff, logically. [P6]
• The mother of 50 Cent's 11-year-old son claims the rapper burned down her Long Island mansion. He claims she totally monitors his cell-phone conversations with the son. Call it a draw? [R&M]

Mario Lopez, right, was a big star on TV's Saved By The Bell and doesn't like sharing the stage with his younger Chorus Line co-star Nick Adams, left. And what Lopez especially doesn't like is when Adams' biceps take the attention away from his bicepts. So Lopez refused to wear a long-sleeved sweater, as called for in the script, preferring instead a tight t-shirt to show off his "guns." And he had Adams outfitted with a baggy hoodie and relegated to the back in the opening dance routine. But now Lopez is finally getting his comeuppance, just as any decent dramatic plotline would dictate. It seems a men's underwear company, once smitten with Lopez, has switched its attention to Nick. Writes Page Six: More »

the theatre

Broadway Hopes to Attract Audience Members With Buff Men

There's a beefcake explosion on old Broadway. Dimple-cheeked, well-muscled actor Mario Lopez (Saved By the Bell: Wedding in Las Vegas) danced his way into America's hearts while on that show about shiny lights and things moving around for an hour, Dancing With the Stars. Now he's nancing—uh, I mean dancing— up a storm again in A Chorus Line on Broadway as, um, the director who's barely ever on stage. But those muscles! They're the best marketing tool a dying art form has got! Plus, as a friendly tipster points out, Mario's got competition. (And Mario's not happy about it.) A young fellow named Nick Adams (after the Hemingway character?), who plays Larry the Dance Captain in the show, has a body to rival Lopez's and, blessedly, the online photo album to prove it. Couple this with Cry-Baby chorus member Spencer Liff getting cited on New York's "Approval Matrix" this week for having "the hottest abs on Broadway," and I think we have a Broadway Beefcake Boom. Now that's theatre. Suck it, Pinter! After the jump find photo evidence of the beefiness. More »

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THE BAYSIDE TIGERS WIN THE SUPERBOWL

['Saved by the Bell' actor and 'Dancing With the Stars' contestant Mario Lopez at the Victoria's Secret Super Bowl party in Phoenix, AZ last night; image via Bauer-Griffin] More »