“Wherever there is number, there is beauty,” wrote the Byzantine philospher Proclus Diadochus in the 5th century, unaware how very wrong he was. According to the average plane-riding American, mathematics is now nothing but the Satanical scripture of olive-skinned terrorists.
In the past politics has been called a game of chess, a dirty game, a blood sport. This year, we’ve decided to throw it all out the window; right now, presidential politics in the U.S. look a whole lot more like a giant, boring math equation.
Republican presidential candidate Carly Fiorina, who is currently polling at one percent in Iowa, has a message for those who think she has zero chance of winning the election. “Polls don’t win elections,” she said at a campaign event in Iowa City today.
Earlier in this month, a computer in Missouri, part of the Great Internet Mersenne Prime Search, discovered the largest known prime number: 274,207,281–1. Actually, the Guardian reports, the number was discovered in September, but nobody noticed until just recently. Anyway, congratulations everyone!
Some very visible bad things have happened. Dozens of people have been shot. Some people are very afraid. They don’t need to be.
As you all know, there is no internet comment more devastating and definitive than saying something is “Economics 101”—thereby proving that you are right, beyond any doubt. Sadly, this important internet commenting device is now threatened.
Oh here is a good personal finance story for 20-something citizens: “If You Have Savings In Your 20s, You’re Doing Something Wrong.”
The Republican presidential primary campaign is, to a large extent, a convention of white male fantasy enthusiasts. You say you can double economic growth, with magic? Well I can... triple it!
At some point in your life you will be asked to order pizza for a group. When that time comes, don’t be afraid. All the information you need to determine how many pies to order can be found in the pizza itself. Because what is a pizza if not a tool for learning fractions?
Have you ever wondered, “How much is all the land in America worth?” You are so high.
A French mathematician has developed a formula to explain the "hipster paradox," the process by which "hipster" nonconformists tend to end up looking the same. Nobody understands what this math guy is saying because everyone calls hipsters fauxhemians now. A wasted mind.
The latest estimates of American life expectancy are out, and we're doing great! Living longer than ever. But—ooo—I hate to ask you this, but maybe, could you not do that, and instead die younger? We have these pension issues, see...
This week, rich and famous human Lena Dunham will begin her 12-city book tour. Several dates will feature regular people performing. They will not be paid. Let's do the math on that. (Updated below.)
Happiness: what is it? A new study has found the answer: it is a mathematical equation based on your own expectations. You are so very predictable, humans.
A furniture salesman got attacked outside a karaoke bar by a pair of unknown assailants. A few days later, he realized he could see complex geometrical equations everywhere he looked.
Montana's governor today appointed Democrat John Walsh to take the seat left open by Sen. Max Baucus, who's becoming an ambassador. The move again gives Montana, population 1 million, the same number of senators as California, population 38 million.
Texas is poised do away with its high-school Algebra II requirement, so that "school districts can better work with local employers to build curriculums that prepare high school graduates to move directly into high-paying jobs." Let's make students into cold-calling sales interns and call it "applied math"!
You were never going to win the lottery. The odds were farcically low. But just in case you were keeping hope alive, we must now inform you: your odds have gotten much, much worse.
Is your child at least six months old? Then brain scientists are able to predict how much your child will suck at math.
Gambling is a system of selling hope in exchange for money. Hope springs eternal, but money always runs out. New statistics show just how hopeless your futile dreams of striking it rich really are.
