Mayor Bloomberg's having a bad week, between the virulently anti-Muslim video starring his police commissioner and the rape charges against his police commissioner's son. So look, Mayor Mike: if you want to quit, you can come work for us writing Gossip Girl recaps.

Guys: Mayor Bloomberg does not want to take away your booze. Yes, the Health Department is considering a proposal to "curb excessive drinking" in New York City. (For this, the Post calls him a "party pooper," Animal NY calls him a hypocrite, and Gothamist calls him Nanny Bloomberg.") Yes, he thinks you probably drink…

Mayor Mike Bloomberg likes junk food, just not for poor people. He's gone to war against salt and soda, but his company's office remains stocked with goodies: "We have all the junk in the world up there," one employee says.

Queens Republican John Haggerty, "One of Mayor Bloomberg's most trusted campaign aides," has been indicted for stealing $1.1 million from Bloomberg's Election Day fund. A million bucks to Bloomberg is like a nickel to you. He's a flinty bastard. [NYDN]

Unaccountable billionaire Mayor-For-Life Mike Bloomberg jets off to his massive Bermudan estate many weekends, where he plays golf, spends money, and zealously guards his privacy. That's what you get when you elect an unaccountable billionaire Mayor-For-Life, New Yorkers. Duh. [NYT]