[Android sexbot Megan Fox is surprised to discover she has the ability to cry. The Daily Mail suspects Megan's eye-touching represents tears shed over her Razzie nomination. I suspect an itch. Image via Splash, click to enlarge.]

[Megan Fox and her husband, Brian Austin Green, take a completely spontaneous, not-staged-at-all Facebook picture at Disney World. Image via Splash]

Celebrities: They bring their significant others to awkward family Thanksgiving dinners just like us! Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal sipped lattes; Kim Kardashian brought home Halle Berry's ex; Lindsay Lohan saw an old flame. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is eating leftovers.

It just is. Deal with it. Also today: Yet another show ripped from the Twitter headlines, Kate Beckinsale continues her odd career, Johnny Galecki is moving into the big time, and Darren Aronofsky is moving out of it.

Snooki sings a requiem for her coiffure of yore. Penelope Cruz confirms her pregnancy. Montana Fishburne is going to rehab. Chelsea Clinton averts her eyes from her husband. Come revel in the delights of Tuesday gossip.

A Siegfried & Roy sex tape scandal involves unwanted groping and a male employee. Emma Watson cuts her hair. Laurence Fishburne offers $1 million to block his daughter's porn debut. Justin Timberlake goes gay. TGIFriday gossip.

For next month's Harper's Bazaar cover, Jennifer Aniston makes like a drag queen and imitates Barbra Streisand. Between this and Lindsay Lohan's incessant Marilyn Monroe impression, the starlets-imitating-starlets trend has officially gone too far.

To keep up with all the rumors they're starting, Katy and Russell will need one thousand and one nights of non-stop ceremonies. Cops investigate Mel Gibson. Elle MacPherson is sorry she ate an endangered animal. TGIFriday gossip.

Actress and huge-thumbed freak of nature Megan Fox married her boyfriend, 90210 actor Brian Austin Green, in a secret ceremony in Hawaii last week. A source told Star: "They're now celebrating their honeymoon," probably by playing pinochle or something. [Star]

The pre-July 4th weekend brought two soaring successes and a few miserable failures, adding more drama to this rollercoaster summer movie season. Let's take a look at the week before America's birthday.

Yes folks, sad news. The What I Like About You actress has quit the acting game, at the tender age of 24. That's, um, too bad. There are at least five other actors who should quit before her.

As expected, the second Toy Story sequel trampled the rest of the competition this weekend, leaving one new movie so far in the dust that it's hardly recognizable. But if you squint, you can make it out. It's Megan Fox.

Lady Gaga is no longer welcome in the Yankees clubhouse. Leann Rimes' divorce is done! Kim Kardashian, somehow grossed out by breast feeding. Michael Jackson's kids have no friends. Megan Fox: Lord of the Nerds. Sunday's gossip Roundup is boob-filled

Lindsay's favorite non-alcoholic beverage is alcoholic! Lady Gaga shocks another sports stadium. Snooki throws a drink. Good Morning America has a gay kiss double-standard. "Kidnapped" Jeremy London's story keeps getting dumber. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is advancing to the next round.

Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green's second engagement is off to a rocky start. Katy Perry and Miley Cyrus get new tattoos. Farrah Fawcett's ghost barges in on Tori Spelling's psychic reading. Thursday gossip has no manners.

Is Betty White's burgeoning sex scandal too strange to be true, or too out-of-the-blue to be untrue? Miley Cyrus says she's not "slutty." Perez Hilton says his Miley Cyrus upskirt wasn't kid porn. Wednesday's gossip roundup is open to interpretation.

January Jones' version of her strange car crash doesn't add up. Neither does Jodie Foster's version of her boy-hitting episode. Who's Tiger Woods' new blonde? Lady Gaga Sparks Mets Apology to Jerry Seinfeld. Saturday Gossip Roundup is an amateur detective.

Lindsay Lohan claims she was framed with drugs! Was Megan Fox fired for being too skinny? Matt Lauer did not sleep with this women. Saturday's Gossip Round Up is pretty from far but far from pretty.

Some say she was, others say she did herself in. What's the truth? Also today: James Franco heads to a comedy, a popular teen book from yesteryear becomes a movie, a new Daily Show?, and Ashton Kutcher.

Christina Hendricks won Esquire's "best-looking woman" contest. But she's still stuck in bracket battles for Sexiest Woman Alive, and doesn't even have a rank in Women We Love. Why can't they be more straightforward? Need to know how to judge.