Most of what we know comes from this brief Fox News report:

A man was arrested for allegedly throwing two tomatoes at Sarah Palin from the second floor balcony during a book signing event at the Mall of America in Minnesota, MyFoxTwinCities.com. reported.

Neither tomato came close hitting the former 2008 Republican vice presidential nominee, but did hit a police officer in the face, the station reported.

The unidentified man may face charges for assaulting a police officer, according to the station.

We called the Bloomington, MN jail and a bored-sounding officer answered the phone, apparently indifferent to the feat of produce-based heroics that had occurred just down the road. He told us the perp's name was Jeremy Paul Olson, that he didn't give a permanent residence, and that he was working alone. He also said Olson will be in court tomorrow to face charges of disorderly conduct and assault on a police officer, "since that's who he hit."

"It would have been the same if [Palin] wasn't there," said the officer. Oh no it wouldn't. If anyone has information on the tomato-wielding Real American Hero Jeremy Paul Olson, please email us. Who is this man? What motivated him to throw tomatoes at Sarah Palin? And most importantly: How could he miss!?

Jeremy Paul Olson, we salute you.

UPDATE: a photo of the man himself:

World Net Daily—the completely insane right-wing "news site" that promotes and "researches" and obsesses over conspiracies like Obama's Kenyan birth and the NAFTA superhighway and FEMA concentration camps—held a press conference on Capitol Hill to celebrate their successful campaign to have their crazy (but spendy!) readers send "pink slips" to members of Congress. Lots of Republican congressmen went! Including Michele Bachmann, pictured with WND editor-in-chief Joseph Farah, one of the foremost birthers.

And remember earlier this month, when Bachmann helped organize and promote the anti-health care reform tea party protest at the Capitol? For the record, that was not a protest. That was a "press conference." It may have looked like a protest, as it was an explicitly partisan event at which the organizers encouraged the public attendees to tear up copies of a bill under consideration, and there was no point at which the press asked anyone questions about anything, but there was one important factor that made that a "press conference" and not a "demonstration": a "demonstration" would not have been allowed under House rules. Because they never sought a permit from the Capitol Police.

Furthermore, if that was a "rally" or a "protest" or a "demonstration" (which it wasn't! it was a simple "press conference"!) Bachmann would've violated House rules when she used her House website to organize and promote it.

That announcement described the event as a "Health Care ‘House Call' on Washington Press Conference" and urged citizens to "tell their Representatives to vote no to a government take-over of one-fifth of our economy."

According to the Member's Handbook - guidelines issued by the House Administration panel that govern the use of official office budgets - lawmakers "may not include grassroots lobbying or solicit support for a Member's position" on their Congressional Web sites.

Yes. Well. Seems pretty clear-cut! But the House Administration Committee decided Bachmann did not violate any rules, even though it basically looks like she completely did. The upshot is that we are granted one of those very small ironies that bitter coastal types cling to, like real Americans and religion: this means Bachmann's anti-government spending "tea party" protest was eligible to be paid for with funds from her official Members' Representational Allowance, making it a tax-funded tea party.

This, by the way, is the cover of this week's Minneapolis City Pages, which is running its millionth "history of Michele Bachmann" piece. This one actually kinda elides much of the crazy! Like the baby-farming and the hiding in bushes and stuff.

This is like the "I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out" of health care town hall viral videos. According to the videographer/blogger, a dozen teabaggers staked out Al Franken's booth at the Great Minnesota Get-Together ready to boo and hiss and shout "socialism!" and all of those things that they have been doing, everywhere.

But these are Minnesota teabaggers. They may be all ginned up with outrage, but these are people who've been conditioned for generations to listen politely to literally anyone talking to them. So, you know, Al Franken, who is actually a smart, wonky guy who loves talking about the specifics of policy, explains some stuff, and the teabaggers reveal concerns slightly more complex and reality-grounded than "DEATH PANELS HITLER," and everyone learns something.

Specifically everyone learns that reasoned debate is booooooooorrrrring. You will never ever see any of this clip on Fox, unless they can somehow edit it to make it look like Franken started crying or something.

[Via AMC, who is guest-hosting Maddow today barring the unexpected 4:30 pm death of Gabe Kaplan.]

Here's Michele's direct quote from April. Once again, she is talking about the expansion of AmeriCorps.

I believe when it's all said and done, this service that — I believe that there's a very strong chance that we will see that young people will be put into mandatory service. And the real concern is that there are provisions for what I would call re-education camps for young people, where young people have to go and get trained in a philosophy that the government puts forward and then they have to go and work in some of these politically correct forums. It's very concerning. It appears that there's a philosophical agenda behind all of this, and especially if young people are mandated to go into this. As a parent, I would have a very, very difficult time seeing my children do this. Again, a huge power-grab, at a cost of billions of dollars.

But the Star Tribune has confirmed that Bachmann's son Harrison has joined Teach For America, which is, of course, a part of AmeriCorps.

We hope he enjoys his time in President NoBama's Forced Labor Gulag!

Last weekend my family sat down and we were watching the commercial movie "Titanic." And as I was listening to Dr. Burgess from Texas talk about the debt and the burgeoning debt load that the United States takes, once the ice gash came in the side of the Titanic, which we all remember was called the "unsinkable Titanic," we think of the United States. Nothing can possibly sink the United States. We will always be a superpower. But one thing that has kept us a superpower has been freedom, free market economists. We are in the process of watching the deconstruction of free market economists before our very eyes, something we have never seen. But as the ice ripped that hole in the Titanic, water started being taken on, and the engineer came out and brought the blueprint of the Titanic. Water came into the first chamber, spilled over to the second, spilled over to the third, and by the time it filled up so many chambers, it was over. It was impossible to resurrect that ship.

Of course she also gave a second speech on the floor that same day complaining about America's "gangster government," by which she means, I guess, the branches of government that she is not a part of, as a member of Congress.

Pawlenty's numbers in Minnesota have been trending a bit downward of late, though a third term was still a definite possibility against a largely uninspiring slate of potential Democratic gubernatorial candidates. Unfortunately, Tim was trying to balance his newfound popularity in the national Republican party with his reputation as a moderate back in Minnesota.

A realistic moderate seeking a third term would probably just fucking sign the papers that allowed Al Franken to be seated as a Senator, which most Minnesotans support. The friendly future of the Republican party would fight tooth and nail to let Norm Coleman take it all the way to the US Supreme Court.

So! What is Tim's end game here? Who the hell knows. He can't be a Senator for years still—he had time to get part of a third term in before losing to Amy Klobuchar in 2012—and the House is a step down from being a Governor. Maybe he just wanted to salvage his career before the Minnesota economy finished completely, utterly tanking? Maybe he'll get an hour-long Sunday show on Fox? (Horn O' Pawlenty!) Either way, now he's free to be a pain in the ass to would-be-senator Stuart Smalley.

Norm Coleman lost his reelection to the US Senate to cocaine-addled New York comedian Al Franken, the famous star of LateLine. It was a very close race, and after the legally-mandated recount, Franken led Coleman by only 312 votes. So Norm took him to court! And lost! So he appealed! And he will lose, again! And in the meantime, Minnesota has only one lonely Senator, and the Democrats are missing their magical 60th vote that will solve all our problems. So the RNC is paying Norm to prolong the inevitable as long as possible, even as it destroys his own political career (a majority of Minnesotans currently wish Norm would just go away).

Should the Minnesota Supreme Court rule against Norm (which will probably happen some time around Independence Day), he could still appeal to the US Supreme Court! If he does this, Republican Governor Tim Pawlenty will have to sacrifice either his Gubernatorial reelection by not signing Franken's election certificate or wreck his future in the national GOP by giving the seat to the Democrat.

Here is a fun fact about the Minnesota State Supreme Court: one of the justices is former Vikings DT and NFL hall-of-famer Alan Page! Page's 148.5 career sacks reassure us that the court will decide fairly. We just wish they'd hurry up about it.

See, Talking Points Memo and others have been asking Norm questions about Nasser Kazeminy, this rich guy who kept just giving him money, all the time. And Norm has not responded to them, once. And so, he asked for permission to use campaign cash to pay legal expenses accrued by not responding to reporters.

We don't respond to hundreds of emails a day—who knew we could be charging for the privilege?

(PS the recount appeal thing in Minnesota will still just continue on, forever and ever, even though it could destroy the career of Tim Pawlenty along with Norm's.)

Michele Bachmann, crazy dumb suburban Minnesota baby-farmer and US Congresswoman, is basically a troll. She says whatever nonsense comes into her head, into microphones, and what comes into her head is usually right-wing conspiracies she read about in an email forward from your crazy uncle.

Back in 2006, six American Muslim imams were thrown off a US Airways flight from Minneapolis to Phoneix because they were Muslim, and that scared everyone. They were all detained and questioned for hours, because, you know, scary Muslims! The Imams were in Minneapolis for a conference. The first Muslim US Congressman ever, Keith Ellison of Minneapolis, spoke at that conference.

So Michele Bachmann, in an interview with some radio station this week, insinuated that Keith Ellison, her fellow member of the Minnesota congressional delegation, was basically a terrorist or terrorist sympathizer, because the Imams (who, in her telling, are guilty of something by virtue of being a bunch of Muslims on a plane) were in Minneapolis for Ellison's election victory party. That is a lie. They were not.

Ellison, the first Muslim elected to Congress, replied Thursday that Bachmann was engaged in "psycho talk."

And here is the response, from Bachmann's crack staff:

Dave Dziock, a spokesman for Bachmann, said today, "whether the six imams were here for a victory party or a conference where he was a featured speaker, it doesn't change the premise of her comments."

Now it could be argued that Dave's statement makes no sense. But let us give him the benefit of the doubt and acknowledge that, yes, whether the imams were in Minneapolis to celebrate Keith Ellison's victory or simply to go to a conference that Ellison happened to be speaking at doesn't really change the premise of Bachmann's comments, because the premise is offensive and moronic regardless.

Norm Coleman, the former Senator, just lost his reelection bid by 300 votes, and right now he is spending most of his time going to every single court in Minnesota, one by one, trying to find a judge or panel of judges who will be like,"Oh, Norm, you clearly want to keep being a Senator so much, we'll just let you be one, again." Every week he loses another court challenge and then he appeals. Next week—next fucking week!—Norm will appeal to the Minnesota Supreme Court. Look at his sad life:

He has learned to ignore the big "Franken" signs on his neighbors' yards that taunt him when he walks out his door, a daily reminder of his five-month battle with Al Franken over the Senate seat Mr. Coleman, a Republican, won in 2002 and neither quite retained nor lost in November. Mr. Coleman said he begins each day with ritual Jewish morning prayer to help him though these trying times.

Small-town Minnesota newspapers that endorsed Coleman over his coke-snorting big-city celebrity rival are now running editorials begging him to give up the fight before he embarrasses the humble little state further. And Norm is just sitting at home, in St. Paul, every day, praying non-stop, making up lies to reporters about having dinner with his wife, who lives in California.

But he will fight on, until Republican governor Tim Pawlenty finally gives in to political pressures and certifies Franken, killing Tim's chances with the national Republican party (he wanted to be McCain's running mate!) but maybe rescuing his career in Minnesota.

Or maybe he'll do it the other way around, and blow off the wishes of Minnesota voters to aid his trip to the big time. In his second piece today, Nagourney sits down with Governor Pawlenty to indulge the amiable prick in his delusions of national prominence. Maybe he will run for President, sure, why not. It is the same old spiel about how what the Republicans need is not new positions or policies, but the same destructive positions and policies delivered by someone friendly and amiable, like him, or Mike Huckabee (preferably him).

Meanwhile for true local cover you should probably go to what remains of the local press:

Iron Range Democrat Jim Oberstar, the dean of the Minnesota congressional delegation, also weighed in Tuesday. "The process has been full and fair, but it has now run longer than the [Elmer] Andersen-[Karl] Rolvaag recount of 1962-63, which Rolvaag won by 92 votes," said Oberstar, who has largely stayed out of the recount fight. "Norm Coleman owes it to the people of Minnesota to take a decency page out of Elmer Andersen's record of public service and end this travail, while people still have a positive impression of him — or risk leaving a sore loser legacy."

So there you have it. Not since Elmer Andersen and Karl Rolvaag settled their own little election contest by seeing which one could pull the biggest walleye out of Lake Mille Lacs has the North Star State seen such a tawdry spectacle. Now here's Leo Kottke and the Hopeful Gospel Quartet to play us out.

The ballots are to be counted in open court next week.

The Times called the ruling "potentially decisive;" a "GOP staffer close to [Challenger Norm] Coleman" told Politico "It’s not looking good.” Coleman really needed more like 1,400 absentee ballots counted.

The Republican's people have already promised Politico they have "no choice" but to appeal to the Minnesota Supreme Court. Which isn't quite the same thing as Coleman saying it; he could suddenly decide to be the noble loser and contradict his staff and bow out, but that's not expected, the appeal is.

Assuming Coleman loses at state supreme court, the Republican could keep appealing, maybe forever, at the federal level, but everyone who didn't detest him for the state appeal will then begin to hate him, and everyone else will be just absolutely seething.

No one knows when Franken would get seated amid all this. Most likely after the state appeal and during any federal appeals. Anyway it's not like the Democratic president desperately needs votes in the senate to pass a budget, financial rescue plan or health care reform this year, or anything.

See, Harry Reid "pledged" back in February to have Franken seated by April 1. Well, that deadline will probably come and go without anyone being seated, as who knows when the three-judge panel will finally rule on Coleman's challenge (supposedly any day now).

Norm Coleman's attorney admitted that Norm will probably lose this round to Franken, but then he'll appeal to the Minnesota Supreme Court, even though that's a terrible idea that will kill his political career for good.

Still, Franken promised this weekend that he'd win, and seemed convinced the case would go to the Minnesota Supreme Court and confident that he'd prevail.

Now John Cornyn has led the rallying cry for a filibuster or something if the Dems try to seat Franken before he gets his certificate. And he can't get his certificate until after the state courts have decided everything. Which means after Norm's appeal to the MN Supreme Court. At that point, should Coleman lose, the election results can be certified. And they probably will be certified, because a) Coleman has no public support to drag this out indefinitely, and b) Governor Pawlenty wouldn't want to be dragged into this (he's been cagey so far) by looking like he's denying Minnesota a vote in the Senate for partisan purposes.

So an appeal to the federal courts probably won't happen, and even if it does, there's a good chance Franken will still be seated while that appeal plays out.

And this is how Politico reported this BREAKING NEWS:

Texas Sen. John Cornyn is threatening "World War III" if Democrats try to seat Al Franken in the Senate before Norm Coleman can pursue his case through the federal courts.

Cornyn, the chairman of the National Republican Senatorial Committee, acknowledges that a federal challenge to November's elections could take "years" to resolve. But he's adamant that Coleman deserves that chance - even if it means Minnesota is short a senator for the duration.

The source for the "years" quote is an off-the-cuff statement Cornyn made last week about how "Appeals take months, if not years, sometimes." Sometimes! The source for the "World War III" quote? Unknown!

But hey, they got their Drudge link for exaggerating and repackaging (and possibly just making up!) old news. World War III!

See, Kazeminy, he kept flying Norm around on his private jet, and hilariously he bought him a bunch of suits at Neiman Marcus. Norm is a broke hobo Senator who lives in a basement apartment paid for by the same GOP bigwig who payed for Sarah Palin's shopping spree at... the Minneapolis Neiman Marcus! Wheels within wheels, just like in the wonderful film Knowing.

Back to Kazeminy: just giving money to Norm, straight-up, was thought to be a little gauche, so Kazeminy had his oil-drilling company, Deep Marine, give money to this other company that Norm's wife Laurie worked for sometimes. The money never made it to Mrs. Coleman (a failed actress who lives in California, and not, like, with Norm in Minnesota or the DC basement or anything) but it's obvious to everyone involved that it was supposed to.

The FBI started poking around, and now the former CFO of Deep Marine has basically confirmed all that money stuff in a deposition.

This former CFO says Kazeminy kept giving money to Norm because he felt bad that we don't pay our Senators enough.

According to the transcript, Thomas was asked, "In that conversation that you had with Mr. Kazeminy, did he tell you, quote, United States senators don't make shit, close quote? Or words to that effect?"

Thomas answered: "Yes, sir.''

So there is your complicated Senatorial bribery illegal gifting lawsuit scandal story, for today. Next we are going to post funny pictures of a lady having sex with presidents, so just relax.

Michele Bachmann probably believes Unicorns evolved into Angels, or something, especially now that we've written that particular theory on the internet, where she does most of her research. She is a crazy baby-farming dingbat who once told a story of George Bush kissing her at the site of a bridge collapse and she probably actually believed it by the time she was through making it up because, as we said, brain of a slow child.

So some TPM blogger made a video of three separate people on three separate occasions reacting to something Bachmann said with an identical expression of complete befuddlement.

We encourage you to use this thread to come up with crazy things you could write on the internet that you'd like Bachmann to say in a debate, TV interview, or on the floor of the US House of Representatives, where she is a member, because of Democracy!