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Furry Flying Freak: Is That You, Ann Coulter?
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Furry Flying Freak: Is That You, Ann Coulter? |
01/06/09
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Someone needs to throw red paint on her, stat.
01/06/09
And as for all the people saying she wouldn't fly coach, 1. she is not extravagantly wealthy, as it's right-wing think tanks that buy in bulk 90% of her books to pump sales, and 2. have you seen the carnage in the publishing industry? 1st class for an author's tour has gone the way of the dodo. Unless you're an author who, paradoxically, sells enough that they can buy their own damned plane.
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"Ooooh, the SkyMall catalog! Let's see what they've got. 'Narwhal tusk backscratcher.' Oooh, I'll get that one for Hannity, he'll LOVE it. Plus, sex toy! Hmmm, what's this? 'Boob Lube.' Now why would ANYONE need that? SCREEECH. Okay. Oooh, 'My Magic Negro: The Soundtrack'! Oh, yes,the perfect Arbor Day gift! Lemme mark that - page 666. HEY, WHAT A COINCIDENCE! Oh, Satan, you silly goof! Hey now, what's this? 'Platinum Microphone - For The Blowhard In Your Life That Already Has A Golden Microphone But Wants to Upgrade to SUPREME Excellence In Broadcasting!' Oh man, RUSH WILL LOVE THIS. I'm tearing this page out. (Ripping sound.) Oh wait - what's this (looks closer; squints) - MADE IN CHINA? I can't give Rush a communist microphone, he'll eat me alive, SCREEEEEECH! (Crumples up paper and throw it on floor.) Then again, I could use the sex. (Picks paper back up and sticks it in pocket; she accidentally touches adjacent passenger's knee with her forehead; he turns to stone.) Ooops, sorry about that, SCREEEEEEECH! Oh, SkyMall catalog, you bring me more joy than that one time I called the 9/11 widows 'self-obsessed'! Aaah, good times, SkyMall, good times. Now, where is that bathroom? Mile-High Club solo membership, here I come! SCREEEEEECH!"
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SCREEEEEEECH!
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That's hot off the wire, as they used to say when the black ink at the Times (and every other paper) wasn't just on the page.
Ron's power-chording, at ten or twenty yards, probably could have killed Coulter. At least "1970" could.
Now he's gone and she's here.
America kind of sucks today. And this is one thing Obama can't fix.
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