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neighborhoods
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Neighborhoods
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neighborhoods
shut up, brooklyn
Our Plan For The Real World: Brooklyn
Oh good Christ. The next season of The Real World, MTV's drunken, disease-riddled dinosaur of a reality series, (the 21st!) will be set in Brooklyn. The current season, which threw a bunch of damaged wannabe stars into a "green" sound studio in Hollywood, is getting annoyingly high ratings. So, the network has decided to sally forth with yet another installment, apparently continuing the smaller-part of an already done city trend, and will dump a bunch of yokels and rubes in our trendiest and irritatingest borough. Now, we don't know for sure which little enclave of Brooklyn the producers are thinking about, but we assume it's somewhere real and gritty, like off the Bedford L! Yes, it seems fairly inevitable that our broken Zelda Fitzgeralds will be plopped into some gorgeous crash pad in hipster Disneyland Williamsburg, but we have a better idea! Why, not the notorious Bushwick McKibbin dorms?? More »
shut up, brooklyn
Confirmed: Hipsters Whine Loudest
Williamsburg and Greenpoint are the whiniest neighborhoods in Brooklyn. In less than a year, the tedious havens of under or over-employed post-college entitled brats/ Gawker employees made 8,900 complaints to 311, beating the #2 neighborhood, Canarsie/ Flatlands, by 500 complaints. Between drunk hipsters making a mess and Polish landlords getting mad and reporting the mess to the city and hipsters then reporting their Polish landlords' minor code violations to the city in revenge, this was inevitable. [Brooklyn Paper]
The Creative Underclass
"Brooklyn's 'creative self-employed' workers — its architects, designers, writers, jewelry makers — are growing. But what's to stop this population from fleeing the region? Perhaps special zoning to help them find affordable rents is one answer, according to Freelancers Union founder Sara Horowitz." They have that already. It's called "neighborhoods outside of Park Slope." [Metro]
"Brooklyn's 'creative self-employed' workers — its architects, designers, writers, jewelry makers — are growing. But what's to stop this population from fleeing the region? Perhaps special zoning to help them find affordable rents is one answer, according to Freelancers Union founder Sara Horowitz." They have that already. It's called "neighborhoods outside of Park Slope." [Metro]
lower east side
Cocoa Bar: The Brown Horseman Of The LES
One of the nicer things about the Lower East Side is that it isn't Park Slope. Sadly, that nice thing became a little less true with the news that the Cocoa Bar will be opening at the end of April down at 21 Clinton Street. Those of you who've had the misfortune of stumbling on the original 7th Avenue Cocoa Bar in Park Slope might know what this arrival heralds. Dave Matthew's Crash Into Me blaring through shitty speakers, a barista with dreadlocks and a kerchief (signed by Trey, if you're lucky) indolently doling out lattes with a malicious I-went-to-Skidmore glint in her eye. In the corner, meanwhile, two mothers passive aggressively share baby stories while their tots systematically pour coffee on the laptops of the other customers. A boob comes out, an infant suckles. Hello, reverse suburbanification. Brooklyn is winning the game.
restaurants
Shopsin's to Stay Put?
A few weeks ago, as you might recall, New York mag announced that Shopsin's, the West Village institution with an interminable menu and a cantankerously charming — charmingly cantankerous? — owner, was up and moving to Brooklyn, looking for cheaper rent. Then the Daily News followed up on the story, downgrading the move from fait accompli to something Kenny Shopsin was considering. But now we're hearing it's not true at all. A source who lives across the street from the restaurant emails: More »
metro
And Let's Not Even Get Started on Staten Island
There are many reasons for homelessness. Many are sad, some tragic, and a few eminently understandable. A there-but-for-the-grace-of- God woman appeared in night court last night; unable to afford her apartment after she lost her job, she'd been arrested and charged with trespassing for sleeping on a Gramercy Park roof. More »
new york times
John Coltrane's Never-Ending West Side Story
We read with interest the lead story in yesterday's Metro section, "Hell's Kitchen, Swept Out and Remodeled." We're always intrigued by the changing face of the city, we're recently frustrated by the disappearance of neighborhood quirks and characters, and we're saddened by the increasing unlikelihood of ever again finding rival dancing gangs on the West Side. And while the article touched on all those points, we were most intrigued by this one: More »
metro
Allah Does Not Want You to Drink in Tribeca
It seems that some downtown bars, including the Tribeca Tavern, the Bubble Lounge, and several places we've never been to, are in danger of having their liquor licenses pulled. Why? From today's Sun: More »
metro
The Prisoners of Atlantic Avenue
The city is apparently thisclose to reopening the Brooklyn House of Detention, that hulking highrise jail between Atlantic and Pacific Avenues in Cobble Hill. The move may be necessary to ease imminent overcrowding at Rikers Island, according to the Times, and it will pose no risk for the yuppie-hipster neighborhood, as the prisoners will be kept safely under lock and key. To further ensure minimal neighborhood disruption, immediately upon arrival the prisoners will be issued horn-rimmed glasses, iPods, and, of course, magazine jobs. More »
philadelphia
Vultures, Vultures Everywhere
We know you're all considering the move to the sixth borough — Dumbo is so played out, man — and so we want to pass along this warning about the risks of that move, as noted by Philadelphia Weekly: More »
park slope
How to Dress for Your Shift at the Co-Op
This is neither the time nor the place to get into our very conflicted feelings about Park Slope, but suffice it to say we think The Muk Report's proposed t-shirt designs are hilariously funny:More »
advertising
An Upper East Side Life, the Flip Side
We're all used to the opulently offensive "luxury homes and estates" advertising in the back on the Times Magazine each week. But one appeared recently that must have reached a heretofore uncharted level of obnoxiousness by making explicitly clear that, frankly, our kind is not welcome there, dear:Leave it to our favorite misanthropic copywriting blogger, however, to remind us that behind every idyllic Upper East Side fantasy lurks a Tom Wolfe novel just waiting to break loose: More »
williamsburg
'Washington Post' Discovers Up-and-Coming Hipster Nabe in Brooklyn
So what if The Washington Post got scooped on its own ur-story a few months ago, when it allowed Vanity Fair to beat it to outing Mark Felt as Deep Throat? The paper is still breaking all sorts of news (even as its star investigative correspondent keeps secrets from its editor for years at a time). More »
Close Enough for Government Work
Noticed Friday night on Seventh Avenue South, just north of Bleecker Street. Department of Transit [NYC.gov]
Noticed Friday night on Seventh Avenue South, just north of Bleecker Street. Department of Transit [NYC.gov]
photos
Walking, Talking Ads Only Marginally More Annoying Than Usual Times Square Pedestrians
It's Advertising Week in New York this week — which strikes us as a touch redundant — and it kicked off this morning with a "Procession of the Great Icons," in which all your favorite legendary advertising characters marched from Times Square to, natch, Madison Avenue. Adweek's AdFreak was there, and the 'Freaks provide some excellent coverage of the event — including photos of the Burger King, the Energizer Bunny, Tony the Tiger, Charlie the Tuna, the Keebler Elves, and even Juan Valdez. More »
columbus circle
Time and Space Are Relative, Particularly During Campaign Season
An AP lede, moved last night: More »
martha stewart
