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onebadclam
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer

Then we can paint the star and crescent on their storefronts and stitch it on their clothes so everyone can be safe. #polls
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ArgusRun
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
Somebody obviously told Brian Fisher about gaydar. He probably thinks all you need to do is recalibrate it to "Jihadi." #polls
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OMG! Ponies!
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
Of course, most U.S. Muslims don't shoot up their fellow soldiers. I mean, look at the Black Muslims. They're so busy raising their fists in the Black Power salute and combing out their nappy afros, it's a surprise that they find time to serve in the military. I'm not saying they're the best (in fact they waver between uppity and shiftless), but you can spot them by following the fried chicken crumbs and watermelon seeds.

We need something to let us spot the Jihadi Muslims. Sure, their crazy eyes are a dead giveaway; but by the time you get close enough to see the crazy eyes, they've set off their bomb-vests.

I used to think that I had a foolproof way to identify the Jihadi Muslims from their moderates, but then I found out that those guys with the dots on their foreheads are Indians and there is no such thing as a Hindu Muslim.

Someone said that there are slope Muslims but I don't buy the idea that the guy bringing me Chicken Chow Mein is a Jihadi. Last time I checked, Asia was nothing but Chinks, Gooks, and Japs.

Now you might think that sweeping generalizations are a bad thing, but they allow us to deal with a large problem in an expedient manner. The Afro-American soldiers are usually pretty loud and foul-mouthed and they usually have gold teeth. But they serve decently enough.

So how is it a problem to view all Muslims as Jihadi Muslims until they show that there is a non Jihadi kind of Muslim? In fact, the more I think about it, those Black Muslims aren't real Muslims.

This is not Islamophobia, it is Islamo-realism. #polls
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Perhaps Not
11/11/09

@OMG! Ponies!: I continue to love you. #polls
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SaraRueful
11/11/09

@OMG! Ponies!: You've been on fire the last couple of days. Whatever you're drinking, keep drinking, no matter what the people at the intervention say. #polls
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OMG! Ponies!
11/11/09

@SaraRueful: Well this is the time of year when I've got to make my bid for a COTY nomination. So I'm upping the snark, the profanity, and the veiled threats to the UN.

(honestly, who do I need to give a rimjob to to get a nomination?)
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Edited by OMG! Ponies! at 11/11/09 5:06 PM OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred

BaconCat
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
how about we do it like WWII: German-americans fight the Japanese and Japanese-Americans fight the Germans! All we need to do now is start another broad, worldwide war with someone else. I say Scientology! #polls
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Mrs. Beeton
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
To be fair to Fischer, most of the military's Arabic translators are probably Methodist. #polls
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Jes St.Lawrence
11/11/09

@Mrs. Beeton: Just what we need: more drunks. #polls
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SeanGone
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
I will not rest until the jihadi/athiest/commie/jew/guido detector is created. #polls
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onebadclam
11/11/09

@SeanGone: Guido detectors already exist. We call them "tanning booths". #polls
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SeanGone
11/11/09

@onebadclam: we all know guido's are to smart for tanning booths. that's why they spray their's on heavily. #polls
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sackofgoats
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
Until the Christians can tell us which Christians are going to leave the military and go all Timothy McVeigh on us, and prove they're right, I think we've got to keep all the Christians out of the military. We simply can't afford the risk.

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Buttafooco
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
I like the idea of the jihadi detector but you'd have to build in some safe codes in case someone wearing one is near a Taco Bell..... because eating a TC burrito is like rigging your ass with explosives, and the last thing you want is Allahu Akbar alarms going off when you're about to commit jihad over a toilet bowl a couple of hours later. #polls
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Mediahohoho
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
I guess we could tell which of our Muslim soldiers are going to turn out to become mass murdering jihadis the same way we find out which cracker- assed suburban scum are going to turn out to be family-killing child rapists, dip shit.

[www.vancouverite.com] #polls
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Unsolicited Advice
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
Bill's comment - you can't just kill people you don't like - was educational to his viewership. Fischer's was inflammatory and baseless, to say nothing of racist or against the very principles of equality upon which this nation was founded. #polls
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katastic
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
You know, Bill O' Reilly sets a low bar, but Bryan Fischer limbos right under it. Congratulations, sir- you are truly the lesser scum which feeds upon scum. #polls
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Adah
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
Fischer is just retarded. Even if we took up his idiotic proposal and banned Muslims from serving, we'd still be working with literally countless Muslim contractors on military bases, especially in the language fields. Good luck finding enough non-Muslim Farsi or Pashto interpreters. If you're going to put forth racist, offensive proposals, at least make them feasible so you don't look like a total idiot. #polls
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CLY
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
So I'm guessing Bryan Fischer would be okay if we put a ban on White male soldiers too since they have a tendency to kill other fellow soldiers sometimes?
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ms_priestypants promoted this comment Edited by CLY at 11/11/09 2:47 PM CLY was starred CLY was unstarred

ms_priestypants
11/11/09

@CLY: Oh, and no male soldiers since they sexually harass and rape the women soldiers. And no white guys for the obvious reasons (Timothy McVeigh). And no women because, jeez, they can't run fast enough and they (willingly) sleep with the other soldiers and mess with morale. And no box trutles because then they will be demanding the right to gay marry a set of antlers.

This new military is one I could really get behind! #polls
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sarrible
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
So, um, Muslims serving in the armed forces are actually cylons? I wonder if Gaius Baltar has perfected that cylon detector of his yet.

Nice thing to say on Veteran's Day, Fischer. You piece of shit. #polls
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katastic
11/11/09

@sarrible: I'd like to know where Bryan Fischer thinks we're going to get our Arab translators from. Indiana? #polls
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sarrible
11/11/09

@katastic: I hear there's a huge crowd of Pashto-speakers in Connecticut just begging to enlist. Except that they're all gay. Wah-wah. #polls
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AndPreciousLittleofThat
11/11/09

In reply to Outrage-Off: Bill O'Reilly vs. Bryan Fischer
How about some Catho-realism? Anybody remember the name of the longest continuously operating terrorist organization in recent history?

Hint: They killed innocent civilians, blew up giant bombs, kidnapped and killed policemen, shot up numerous public places, and actively plotted the assassination of major opposition leaders over a period of eighty years.

Answer: the good ol' Irish Republican Army. So why not give all the active military Catholics the boot? #polls
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Mariallena
11/11/09

@AndPreciousLittleofThat:
I thought you were talking about the CIA. #polls
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