The thing about reenacting a movie trope in real life, is that real life consequences will follow. Always. Because it's not a movie. Gravity, judgement, debt, concerned witnesses, police, repercussions all exist.

A-Rod "crashed" his ride. Simon Cowell: engaged. Barry Bonds: divorced. Jim Carrey: grandfather. Where Tiger Woods loses $100M, I see opportunity. The world changes and turns. Let this final weekend shit begin. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Welcome to the inaugural edition of The Vintage Gawker Collection, where we'll roll out old posts from the vault in full to provide perspective on the present. Tonight: Jessica Coen's 2005 post, 123 Reasons to Love New York Right Now.

[People enjoy the creature comforts—ceiling fans, wicker benches!—during a Vintage Tea Party on one of the old rail cars New York City Transit is running on the rails this month. Image via Getty]

Where, exactly, are you supposed to start when the New York Times runs a Page One media piece on the word "douche"?

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

Speaking of old school, this weekend the Times featured an epic 2,000-word Alan Feuer profile of legendary Daily News reporter Jimmy Breslin who's got a book out and, who is, much to Feuer's surprise, still alive, kicking-and working! Gee whiz, good for him. Feuer may not be the most erm, precise reporter on the…