Gawker: Pete Doherty

Take a Bath With Pete Doherty

ian spiegelman — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 17:48:03 EDT

While Amy Winehouse is in the hospital with emphysema, her Brother in Crack Pete Doherty is cleaning up. Well, at least he's taking a bath. As part of his "Come to Gig" series on YouTube the drug-filled rocker brings you into his dark, scary, mildewy world as he prepares for a show. Video of a man in trouble after the jump.

[via Fametastic]

Bill Murray's Wife Says He Has A Girl In Every Port

Ryan Tate — Fri, 30 May 2008 10:08:39 EDT

Bill Murray's wife wants a divorce and claims the actor is a pot-smoking globe-trotting sex addict who is physically abusive. The Daily News recalls: "At a bash at Robert De Niro's Tribeca Grill in the '90s, we watched as Murray punch-shoved photographer Diane Cohen in the chest."
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are having a housewarming party at their new Beverly Hills mansion tomorrow, all the other Scientologist living gods are sure to be there.
In the meantime, Holmes conducted a big business meeting at the Carlyle Hotel in New York, which illustrated that she is "a very strong and determined" actual businesswoman who can do important businesswoman stuff. Evidence: During the meeting, which was related to her coming role in a Broadway play, she listened intently, took notes, and when her phone rang SHE DID NOT ANSWER IT. This is the glory of being a "clear," people. [OK!]
Amy Winehouse if a filthy drug addict with a disgusting skin condition, so logically men are fighting over her. Fellow druggie musician Pete Doherty wrote to Winehouse's jailed husband, Blake, demanding he divorce Winehouse so Doherty can finally seal his bond of desperation with her. Nelson Mandela is also into Winehouse, but only as a performer at his 90th birthday.
Remember how Kirsten Dunst said she went to rehab for depression instead of for drugs? Now Steven Tyler of Aerosmith insists he checked into rehab to recover from a foot injury. It's amazing how rehab clinics have diversified these days, now that all the stars are clean. [Us]
Britney Spears' lawyer argued her health is too "fluid" for the singer to participate in the court case over her posessions, now under the care of her father. This may just be a ploy to ensure visitation with her sons until she stabilizes, since the visitation is better protected when her father is acting as conservator.
John Mayer, former Perez Hilton make-out partner, gets pretty gushy toward fellow musician Pete Wentz on his blog. "I think the world of you." [Showbiz Spy]
Recent drunk driver Mischa Barton continues to act erratic, and now her legs look screwy. [Rush & Molloy]
Charlie Sheen may be on his fourth baby. It's the third mom. [Rush & Molloy]
Clay Aiken, 29, donated sperm to his record producer, 50, and plans to be "part of the baby's life." [P6]
Bill Cosby's famous Cosby Show sweaters are being auctioned for charity. [NY Sun]

Amy Winehouse Doing Some Sort Of Drug Thing On YouTube

Nick Douglas — Sat, 17 May 2008 02:25:27 EDT

I...god I'm the last person on this site who should be posting gossip...singer...stuff like this but everyone else is still out at bars and I'm drunk but here is Amy Winehouse playing with ~~eating?~~ baby mice along with what...looks like...Pete Doherty. God I hope any of this is really true because I'm going to bed. HERE IS THE VIDEO. It got a lot of views.

Newest Disaster Also Not Miley Cyrus' Fault

Ryan Tate — Fri, 16 May 2008 06:10:05 EDT

An LA band called Lustra called out Miley Cyrus by name for a song that sounds way, way too much like one of their songs. But it turns out Cyrus doesn't write any of her own songs, so now the band kind of looks like a bunch of assholes. [P6]
Natalie Portman took a jet ride with movie producer Ryan Kavanaugh and then supposedly "looked smitten." But she's still in love with hippie folksinger Devendra Banhart. [P6]
Sarah Jessica Parker insisted she is not in a massive catfight with Sex And The City co-stars, particularly Kim Cattrall. Supposedly Cattrall refused to sit through the movie's premiere. Parker said, "I wouldn't have wanted to do it with anyone else," which doesn't really address the rumor. [Daily Star]
Pete Doherty keeps writing songs for Amy Winehouse, who keeps calling them "shit" and "rubbish." [Mirror]
You know how you can tell Britney Spears is, indeed, pregnant? Because she recently visited a doctor. [Showbiz Spy]
First Jack Black revealed Angelina Jolie is pregnant, now Dustin Hoffman has leaked the due date, August 19. More cameos! [Sun]

Oprah's Dogs Get Pharaoh Treatment

Ryan Tate — Thu, 15 May 2008 08:41:05 EDT

This gold bust of Oprah features two dogs above her head, begins showing next week at a gallery and is intended to highlight "the overlooked threat of accidental pet fatality by common household products." [Oh No They Didn't] (Photo from Caplakesting.com via OhNoTheyDidn't)
There are rumors of a sex tape involving crazy Britney Spears and former slimy hanger-on and alleged drugger Adnan Ghalib. Also, there are again rumors Spears is pregnant. All this according to the Sun, which provides no details whatsoever. [Sun]
Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz sent out Evites for their wedding, then started auctioning off press access. The bidding is somewhere above $1 million, because it is surely a once-in-a-lifetime event for both bride and groom: "Ashlee is so needy - she just hangs all over Pete... He's always had a thing for vulnerable girls... I can't imagine one would ever leave the other." [Daily News]
Michelle Trachtenberg of Gossip Girl fainted Tuesday night at a Sunglass Hut store in SoHo. [P6]
Angelina Jolie confirmed the rumors she is pregnant with twins on the Today show, where she was plugging the movie Kung Fu Panda. None of her previous opportunities to speak out on the matter provided equivalent gravitas. [P6]
Pete Doherty buys pregnant mice to feed to his cat, probably to keep them from slashing him up again. [Sun]

Fashion Jew Not To Be Trusted, Says Post

Ryan Tate — Tue, 13 May 2008 09:45:15 EDT

David Lauren, the Jewish fashion scion barred from Jenna Bush's wedding, hit on some other woman while girlfriend Lauren Bush was at the nuptials, so grandpa and grandma Bush were totally right about him being a non-commital dirty old man, according to the right-leaning Post. This piece of gossip sounds like a total slam dunk. [P6]
Leven Rambin of All My Childen reportedly threw herself at actor Shia LaBeouf and everything turned out "just as she hoped it would." [Daily News]
Lexus offered Paul McCartney an environmentally friendly hybrid limousine, and he accepted, because he didn't realize the vehicle would be sent to him by airplane, "creating a carbon footprint almost 100 times bigger than if it was shipped." [Showbiz Spy]
Freedom hater Oliver Stone's critical George W. Bush biopic? Totally funded by the Chinese, Germans and, worst of all, AUSTRALIANS. [P6]
Beyoncé, who married fellow musician Jay-Z just over a month ago, is now pregnant, supposedly. An associate figured this out when she gained some weight and did not do the "Def Jam detox," whatever that means. [P6]
Anne Hathaway's Italian boyfriend is off the hook for writing a $215,000 check against an account with just $39.08 in it, so she can stop crying to the police about it. [P6]
Rapper Remy Ma's fiancée Papoose tried to sneak a handcuff key into their jailhouse wedding but was caught, so no ceremony was allowed. Def Jam detox time! [P6]
On Britney Spears' latest How I Met Your Mother cameo: "The fact that Britney’s second guest spot really didn’t work was no fault of hers. She’s not at all bad at playing clunkily-sweetly dumb... But the script was an awful piece of specialty construction." [People]
The headline is sufficient: "Pete Doherty Sought Help After Trying To Kill Cat With Shovel." [Showbiz Spy]

Tom And Katie's Romantic Trip To "Gold Base"

Ryan Tate — Fri, 02 May 2008 08:54:27 EDT

Tom Cruise sent wife Katie Holmes to a three-day Scientology boot camp at "Gold Base" to prevent her from working on her Broadway play in New York without him, said Star magazine.
Paris Hilton looks frighteningly skinny in this picture. [Sun]
Miley Cyrus "skipped" a Disney event in Orlando, Florida, which would have been her first public outing since her racy Vanity Fair shoot. [LA Times]
Druggy singer Pete Doherty is the guy who managed to shoot up not just in jail but in the detox unit of the jail. So the Brits decided to just let him go, one month into a three month sentence. [Sun]
Former child star Gary Coleman went on Divorce Court with his 22-year-old wife Shannon Price. Coleman failed to support Price in a fight with a stranger about when the world was ending. [DListed]
Jason Biggs from American Pie married actress Jenny Mollen in a private ceremony last week. [People]
When singer Lou Reed and performance artist Laurie Anderson got married, they paid $10 to be wed in the "Boulder Mountain marriage license office." [Gigwise]
Dennis Rodman, the former basketball star, was arrested for hitting a woman in a hotel. [Enquirer]
Singer Usher denied rumors he wanted to auction pictures of his baby son. [P6]

Pete Doherty Will Shed Blood For His Art

Richard — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 12:40:00 EDT

Like Koko the gorilla before him, musician and voodoo zombie Pete Doherty has manipulated his hands in such a way, across a piece of canvas or paper, that something resembling "art" has been created. An exhibit of his work launched in Montmartre yesterday, though sadly he missed his debut because he's, well, in jail for drugs. The work, though, really speaks for itself. Unlike Koko's seminal masterpiece "Pink Pink Stink Nice Drink," in which abstract paint smears represented deep and mysterious gorilla emotions, Mr. Doherty's work consists of clear and distinctive symbology and motifs. Notably, the use of his own image and his own blood. My favorite piece is the one in which he signed his name with blood (his own) found inside an old needle. Just lovely. Some images after the jump.

Here's his bloody needle pen:

This is his own blood, and his ex-girlfriend, model Kate Moss:

"Ms. Moss Reclines"

Cate Blanchett Delivers Third Son

Ryan Tate — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 05:14:18 EDT

Actress Cate Blanchett had her third son, Ignatius Martin, with husband Andrew Upton. Ignatius was born in Sydney. [People]
Britney Spears rear-ended someone on the freeway and proceeded to dinner. The singer's ex, Adnan Ghalib, got stabbed and returned home from the hospital.
Sting paid $27 million for his second apartment on Central Park West. The singer's new place is on the 16th floor of 15 CPW. [P6]
Pete Doherty gets his own cell and a special mattress in jail after missing repeated drug tests. The other prisoners are pissed because they have to earn those privileges, but the junkie singer gets them for being famous. [Sun]
According to Alicia Keys, the U.S. government invented gangsta rap to get black people to kill each other [Sun]

Poor Little Heroin Addict Sent To Bad Place

Richard — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 14:00:00 EDT

Pete Doherty, an entertainer of children who just may have some blood in his heroin system, has been thrown in the clink. The Babyshambles frontman and former paramour of hollow-boned Kate Moss ("Ow, my bones...") has been sent to English prison (a land without tea) for 14 weeks. On what charges, my good man? Well, for "breach of time keeping, non-compliance of his order and using different drugs." Ah. Different drugs. Had he stayed with the old ones... well, none of this would have happened. He'll miss two scheduled performances and untold instances of pants-wetting and sadness-inducing, and is thusly looking into filing an appeal. Perhaps the outcome of the appeal will finally determine once and for all if Pete is in fact famous enough to never really get in trouble, or if he's just a miserable shit like the rest of us. [Showbiz Spy]

Scientology's Glamorous New Friends

Ryan Tate — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 05:17:32 EDT

Game over, Scientology wins, they have Pete Doherty and Sumner Redstone. Viacom chairman Redstone hasn't actually converted but did have lunch with Scientology bigshot Tom Cruise, probably canceling in his area a personal and business rift with the actor and paving the way for more sweet Mission Impossible money. Doherty has been reading up on the religion and shacking up with a Scientologist DJ who probably hasn't yet mentioned the religion's stance on psychoactive drugs.
Accidental gay porno fan (and singer) John Mayer posted a long rambly blog "about a young guy who maintains a celebrity blog... who has wrestled with a lifelong battle for acceptance as a gay man." Then, mercifully, "I'm going quiet now." [JohnMayer.com]
Star overlord Bonnie Fuller said singer Britney Spears' parents are "pimps" who treat their daughters like "cash registers" and "bank machines." To back this up, the American Media editorial director has both an anonymous quote and a book-plugging psychiatrist. Air. Tight. [HuffPo]
There's talk of a Hills movie. Well, of course there is. The question is, have they stockpiled enough stares. [MTV]
Hills stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt "work on their relationship" by going to Vegas and staying in different rooms, in different hotels and barely talking. Actually, that is seriously a dream vacation for some couples. [People]
Atress Lindsay Lohan will play a member of the Manson family. [E! Online]
She's supposedly jetting off to rehab soon, but singer Amy Winehouse still can't manage to get to the jail on time to visit her husband. [Sun]

They Say His Case Rattles With the Bones of the Damned

Richard — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:17:00 EDT

[Druggy old Pete Doherty in London, going to Amy Winehouse's...uh, house; image via Bauer-Griffin]

Perez Hilton Discovers Celebrity Maybe Doing Something We Already Know He's Doing

Richard — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 10:08:48 EST

Perez HIlton seems to think that he's discovered a magical portal into pile o' drugs rockabilly rascal Pete Doherty's soul. Well, at least into his crack smoking. The famous blogger, known for his professionalism, has found Mr. Doherty's YouTube account. The videos that the supposed "Doherty" has uploaded are mostly in keeping with a crazed drug addict's tastes: silent footage of a fire burning, wee Englishmen walking about a darkened house with nothing more than a candle, etc. Oh, and a glass chicken full of smoke. Yep. That's all it is, but Perez decides that it's abject proof of drug use (he's "taking a hit" from the glass chicken, to use the lingo). It's even less conclusive than the video of now dead actor Heath Ledger sniff snorting on some cocaine. Even though, erm, Doherty has a long history of drug use and would probably take a hit out of his mother if she were full of sweet, sweet crack smoke. But still, it could be anything! Tobacco! Or, marijuana! Or... Oh for fuck's sake it's crack, isn't it? Just roll the damn tape. (After the jump.) [Perez]

Pete Doherty Is Beautiful and Should Be Compensated Thusly

Richard — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 09:30:53 EST

Pete Doherty, rock musician and skinny little skeleton full of drugs, has been asked to model for a line of cheap clothing, and he wants proper payment. The company reportedly offered him $10,000 but, Doherty, who is a pretty pretty flower and not horrifying looking at all, demanded more more more. Six times more, to be exact. "When they said 30,000 [$60K] I nearly had a heart attack. Who does he think he is, Claudia Schiffer?" remarked a spokesman for the company. No, he's not Claudia Schiffer. He's better and important and used to date a famous lady. Babyshambles wants money. Give him more money for precious druggy wuggies. [Showbiz Spy] After the jump, more evidence of Doherty's stunning good looks (maybe NSFW. He says FUCK.)

Britney Spears Has Your Conservatorship Right Here

Ryan Tate — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 09:34:19 EST

Britney Spears' stupid dad took away her stupid booze and set her bedtime at stupid 11 o'clock, but he can't make her keep on her underwear, ha ha! Despite having a Vagina Of Freedom, Spears doesn't get to see her sons, even though K-Fed thinks the toddlers would be a more mature influence on the troubled singer than alleged grown men Sam Lufti and Adnan Ghalib.

Amy Winehouse had no idea her husband might have been trading her autographed pictures for heroin, even though he had just been treated in jail for an overdose. She thought it was for cigarettes and so forth! [Showbiz Spy]

U2 threatened a new double album based on their experiences in countries that hate precious American freedoms. [Reuters]

Kirstie Alley will personally teach you to lose weight, probably the insane Scientology way, after she was booted by Jenny Craig. [People]

If TMZ did not exist, who would publish pictures of Pete Doherty's rotting teeth?

Actor Orlando Bloom just slept over at Miranda Kerr's house. Don't deny it, there's video. There, there. Go ahead, let it out. [TMZ]

Here's the new guy who decides if you will get into the Waverly Inn and, wow, he's getting a friendly notice in Page Six! Well played, Posties. Well played.

Alert Homeland Security: J. Lo has entered her ultra-secure, roped-off private maternity wing where no one else is allowed to go, except the elite cyborg guards. Do not look at pregnant J. Lo. Do not think about looking at pregnant J. Lo. Stop. Reading. This. Item. Terrorist. [P6]

Nicolas Cage has the same accountant as Wesley Snipes. [P6]

BREAKING, from the British tabloid the Sun: OMG, Demi Moore continues to age, like some kind of aging freak. (Clue: So does Ashton.) [Sun]

Serene Britney Spears Doesn't Know Why You Keep Offering Advice

Ryan Tate — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 07:58:40 EST

Britney Spears is finally on the right path. Model Heidi Klum made her look a bit more sane by offering to fix all of Spears' problems for her, an offer that of course succeeded only in making Klum look as crazy as Dr. Phil and Courtney Love. Then Spears took another step down the path toward appropriateness and normalcy by going clubbing with her father. Everything was going so well that Spears decided the time was perfect to try on wedding dresses and steal a blouse. She ended up very glad about not wearing a bra.

Amy Winehouse is so sweet. She's brought autographed pictures to the jail where her husband is being held so he can trade them for very cheap heroin. A lot of wives wouldn't go to such lengths right after their husbands had just overdosed in the very same jail.

If you give Pete Doherty $30,000 to perform for you, your wife and your three children, and he of course shows up too drunk or high to stand, just give him seven hours to sober up, you're as good as gold. Then his handlers can talk about how you "certainly got value for money.... not many fans get to spend such quality time with their hero." Also, you can go down in history as "the guy who hired Pete Fucking Doherty to perform for his kids." [Showbiz Spy]

Rudy Huxtable alive, hot, sweet. She's even sweet to the filthy paparazzi. [TMZ]

If you touch J. Lo's private vaginal birth room, ever, she will cut you. [P6]

Dear Jennifer, I sold you out because I want grandchildren, and I got tired of waiting for that bitch Angelina to fly the coop. I'll take pictures for you at the wedding. Love, Brad's Mom. [Showbiz Spy]

Flavor Flav is promiscuous, broke and has a crazy and inappropriate hustle on to make money. This is not gossip so much as the immutable state of his existence, right? [P6]

Don Johnson has a fan! [TMZ]

Observer's Spencer Morgan doesn't get to bring his friends to his own birthday party, only Anna Wintour, because his fiancée is obviously wrong for him. [P6]

Horrible Drug Addict, Entertainer of Children

Richard — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 10:31:23 EST

Pete Doherty, rock musician and skinny little skeleton full of drugs, recently played a child's birthday party. He is apparently so hard up for cash since his split from model and smack mama Kate Moss, that he accepted a mere £100 for the gig, the equivalent of $4 million US. I mean $200. He was such a hit that now other parents are asking if he'll do the same for their lil' lasses! Never mind that his band is called Badboy Babyshambles or that one of his super smash hit number one jams is called "Fuck Forever." British people are so weird! [Showbiz Spy]

That Naked Picture of Vanessa Hudgens Is Really Real!

Emily Gould — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 08:57:05 EDT

The rep for High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens says, "This was a photo which was taken privately. It is a personal matter and it is unfortunate that this has become public." Uh, or it's the best thing that's happened to her career yet. [TMZ]

Billy Joel's trophy wife, failed Top Chef host Katie Lee Joel, denies that she was turned away from P. Diddy's white party for wearing cream. "I was only dropping off house guests before I went out to dinner! They denied me from a party I wasn't even going to," she "explained." [R&M, 2nd item]

Jesus fuck, even Pete Doherty's cat is on crack. [The Sun]

Pete Doherty And Kate Moss Are Over Again

Emily Gould — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:00:56 EDT

"You have touched my heart and soul you little fucker... You make me high my sweet. My skin shivers and longs to be held by you," Kate Moss once wrote in a love note to her junkie boyfriend Pete Doherty. But now! "Movers were spotted at Moss's London home Wednesday removing furniture and guitars, a piano, paintings and suitcases." Apparently Pete slipped up and did it with a South African model last week, although how that guy even manages to get it up we have no idea. Anyway, guess the wedding's off!

Pete Doherty Moves Out of Kate Moss's London Home [People]

Kate Moss To Pete Doherty: "You Make Me High"

Emily Gould — Fri, 22 Jun 2007 09:20:30 EDT

Kate Moss and Pete Doherty = Heloise, Abelard. Evidence? This is Kate: "You have touched my heart and soul you little fucker... You make me high my sweet. My skin shivers and longs to be held by you." Pete: "Smack and needle-free we shall marry in the summer and I become 10 times happier than any given smackhead. Huzzah!" Awww. (Seriously!) [Page Six]

Andre Balazs to make the Chelsea Hotel into a Hotel Marmont simulacrum. Eesh. [Page Six]

Marilyn Manson on Courtney Love: "With more surgery she could even play Yoko Ono." Whatever, ugly. [Cindy]

O.J. Simpson: kind of drunk and nutty. [TMZ]

Pete Doherty Faux-Marries Kate Moss

Chris Mohney — Tue, 02 Jan 2007 09:40:21 EST

Groom at right, not-bride at left. Both the Sun and Daily Mirror have eerily identical "exclusives" claiming that rocker, clothing designer, and invincible narcotics machine Pete Doherty wed his coke-friendly impregnated fianc Kate Moss on a beach in Phuket, Thailand. Supposedly this is just another playtime nonbinding "'bizarre' Buddhist" symbolic marriage thing, a la Anna Nicole Smith and her lawyer. Won't get fooled again, eh tabloids? So don't despair ladies — Doherty may still be technically on the market, if he's your type.

Thai wedding for Kate and Pete [Sun]
EXCLUSIVE: THAI DO - KATE AND PETE HITCHED [Daily Mirror]

[Photo: Getty]

In Wake of Blanco Death, Pete Doherty Fends Off a Dire Accusation

Emily Gould — Mon, 11 Dec 2006 10:40:00 EST

The police investigation into the suspicious death of actor Matt Blanco, who fell to his death outside a London apartment building after an altercation with world's crackiest crackhead Pete Doherty, is ongoing. Blanco's sister, who has publicly wondered why Doherty fled the crime scene, told the Independent: "We're finding it very difficult to do any grieving as we're so busy trying to find out the truth. We want to know what happened that night. This is not about us assigning blame on a pseudo-celebrity. We just want the truth."

We just want the truth, too, Miss Grieving Relative, and we'd like to inform you that Pete Doherty's celebrity has totally transcended the "pseudo" level. Why, just look at how many entries there are under the 'Pete Doherty' tag on Gaw . . . yeah, never mind.

Police Question Doherty On Party Death [AP]

Crack Now Basically Legal in UK for Pete Doherty

Chris Mohney — Tue, 05 Dec 2006 13:40:51 EST

Britrocker and Kate Moss manbutter supplier Pete Doherty may have been caught with heroin and crack in his car while ostensibly in drug rehab, but that's nothing a few hundred pounds and a break from driving can't fix. Making his weekly court appearance, Doherty didn't pretend to wince at this slap on the wrist, even enjoying a compliment from the judge for one of his songs. He now has a few days to try and figure out just what, exactly, one has to do in London in order to actually go to jail these days. We look forward to more progress from what must surely be the most tolerant (if not successful) rehab program in the world.

Rocker Pete Doherty Spared Jail Time [AP]
[Photo: Getty]

Earlier: If It's Sunday, Pete Doherty Must Be on Crack

If It's Sunday, Pete Doherty Must Be on Crack

Chris Mohney — Mon, 20 Nov 2006 13:30:14 EST

After managing to stay away from the authorities for over a week, Pete Doherty, Babyshamblet and Kate Mossifier, was arrested yesterday on suspicion of driving on crack. Apparently, Doherty and a couple pals were busted near his London home, meaning he was either on his way out or on his way home. Buzzkill. But at least this is a comfortingly familiar territory for Doherty and the rest of the world. You just know that baby can't wait to meet daddy!

Rocker Pete Doherty Released on Bail [AP]
[Photo: Getty]

Pete Doherty Only Has Two Bits to Pay Off Harassing Scum

Chris Mohney — Thu, 09 Nov 2006 10:30:00 EST

Finally brought to book on charges that he kicked a reporter on the way out of court the last time he was brought to book on charges, Kate Moss cocaine-impregnatron and Babyshambler Pete Doherty was ordered to pay $2,255 in various fines. The aspiring fashionistard

appeared in court wearing a black coat and clutching a black trilby hat. He told the court he could not pay the fine Wednesday because he had only 50 cents with him.
He apologized for the incident, but called [kick recipient and BBC journalist Trudi] Barber part of the 'harassing scum of press.'

Please blame the AP for currency conversion problems, but 50 cents? How does he keep himself in blow and trilby hats without carrying a fattie cash roll?

Doherty Fined for Assaulting Journalist [AP]
[Photo: Getty Images]

Pete Doherty, Linguistic Frontiersman

Doree Shafrir — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 16:15:06 EST

Not content to let his fucked-uppedness infect one creative industry, Babyshambles frontman/Kate Moss drug supplier Pete Doherty is planning a fashion line with British clothing company Gio-Goi, which we've never heard of. Though this news is slightly confusing, it's no less confusing than what Doherty told NME:

"Gio-Goi are on the fashionista manor. They've tumbled their gain; I love the clothes!"

Um, did he just say he wants to buy some crack?

Pete Doherty Inspires Clothing Line [NME]

BREAKING: Kate Moss Pregnant and Engaged

suki — Mon, 23 Oct 2006 11:10:43 EDT

UK tabloid Sunday Mirror is reporting that Kate Moss is pregnant with junkie/rocker Pete Doherty. Phil Michels, described by Mirror as a gardener and Doherty's "favourite uncle" revealed the news after Doherty spoke to him from the couple's rehab/vacation in Italy.

Frankly, we are mildly surprised that anyone with as much drugs in his system as Doherty can procreate, let alone, you know, do the deed. And there's some joke in there about doing coke for two.

EXCLUSIVE: KATE IS HAVING A BABY [Sunday Mirror]

Kate Moss in Second Cocaine Non-Shocker

Jessica — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 10:40:18 EDT

God bless the British tabloids, even if they've not yet mastered red-eye reduction.

After it was reported that Kate Moss and rocker Pete Doherty have reunited during Doherty's tour of Ireland, the UK Sun took it upon itself to closely examine a picture taken the night Moss joined Doherty on stage. It's not quite as explicit as a picture with a rolled banknote up her nose, but you get the idea. It's a great shot, actually — too bad that it won't cause much of a stir. Given the context and all.

What's Got Up Kate's Nose? [Sun UK]
Earlier: Together Again, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty Chase the Dragon

Together Again, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty Chase the Dragon

Jessica — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 09:40:46 EDT

Great news for fans of Kate Moss, the rail-blowing supermodel who lost millions in contracts — and then made more millions than ever — on the rebound after she was photographed cutting lines for herself, then-beau Pete Doherty, and his bandmates. The Associated Press reports (and really, this is AP-worthy) that Moss is back with Doherty; the two are traveling together in Ireland, where Doherty's band is on tour. At a show outside of Dublin, Moss even took the stage to sing along with Doherty for a few songs.

This is fantastic for Kate, as Doherty checked himself out of a court-ordered stint in rehab last week, has pleaded guilty to five charges of carrying just about every drug, and has been arrested for possession at least 17 times in the last three hours. If she sticks around and gets "caught" with a syringe in her arm, it'll only be a matter of hours before Chanel comes crawling back.

Kate Moss and Pete Doherty Are Back Together [AP]

Gossip Roundup: Special Doodles From Michael Lohan

Jessica — Tue, 22 Aug 2006 13:00:46 EDT

• From his damp prison cell, Michael Lohan sends Lloyd Grove an editorial cartoon depicting his relationship with daughter Lindsay Lohan. We think this guy's got a future with the New Yorker. [Lowdown]
• Oprah chooses 73 of the most camera-ready (but needy!) girls to attend a school she's built in South Africa. [BBC]
• There's no way in hell that Victoria Beckham has this much flesh on her ass. [Us Weekly]
• You know why Kate Moss never says anything? Because she's a complete idiot. The model was rumored to be marrying junkie rocker Pete Doherty in a small ceremony in Indonesia; Doherty was detained in London on drug charges, alas, so we'll have to wait to see how far Moss' stupidity can go. [Gatecrasher]
• For the next season of Survivor, contestants are rumored to be split up according to race. Like that's not going to cause some major issues on and off the island. [Page Six]
• Steven Soderbergh puts an end to his Ocean's franchise one film too late. [IMDb]
• Samantha Cole, the otherwise unremarkable "singer" who slept with philandering Peter Cook back in the 90s, keeps her name in Page Six by screaming at a model, who called Cole a whore and then dumped ice in her lap. For once, we really like models. [Page Six]

Gossip Roundup: Jeffrey Epstein Hates Beating Off Alone

Jessica — Tue, 25 Jul 2006 13:05:01 EDT

• Billionaire financier Jeffrey Epstein — who, with Mort Zuckerman, helped fund the baby steps of Radar 2.0 — just wants to be happy. Thus he hired a certified prostisseuse to come over work the knots out of his back and give him a happy ending. Now he's been indicted for soliciting a hooker and is charged with a third-degree felony. No word on whether or not he ever got that handjob. [Page Six]
• In an impressive psychological twist, Colin Farrell's stalker Dessarae Bradford holds a press conference on the steps of the LA federal courthouse and accuses the actor of stalking her. Crazy bitch is good. [Lowdown (last item)]
• Christopher Hitchens writes for Maxim, tells youth of America to go bareback. [Page Six]
• Tara Reid is told by her agent that she's landed the lead in Senior Skip Day and, to ensure her career's revival, she'll be starring opposite Robert De Niro. Unfortunately, De Niro's people insist he's in no way involved in the project. As for Reid's agent: cruel, but hilarious. [R&M (2nd item)]
• Gay everywhere throw tantrums as Nic Cage signs on to play Liberace. The role's really too subtle for him. [TMZ]
• Pete Doherty schedules another five-minute stint in rehab. [E!]

Gossip Roundup: Jessica and Nick Make It Legal

Jessica — Fri, 30 Jun 2006 13:00:29 EDT

• Though the financial details have yet to be settled, Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson are a very short stone's throw from becoming legally divorced, freeing Jessica to marry her father. [TMZ]
• A British literary magazine has published a poem written by Kate Moss for her then-beau, crackhead Pete Doherty: You love them more than you love me/So that's why I could cry all day long/that's why I can't breathe. Watch out, Donald Hall. [Page Six]
• A fight breaks out after someone tries to photograph the Black Eyed Peas at a club in Berlin. Gee, that was worth it. [R&M]
• Dan Rather won't touch Walter Cronkite with a ten-foot-pole. Maybe if the pole were longer than the tongue of a black Alabama rattler. [Page Six]
• MSNBC HATES TRANNIES: Rita Cosby's show will be cancelled in July. [Lowdown]
• When he was a wee lad, Mekhi Pfieffer was best known as the kid who went and pissed on his classmates' coats. [disco-not-disco]

Review Copies Will Distributed With a Promotional Gift Pack Filled With Pipes and Syringes

Jessica — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 11:45:03 EDT

20 volumes of perpetually fucked rocker Pete Doherty's incoherent ramblings will be bound into a single, hardcover volume and marketed as poetry in March 2007. Surprisingly, Doherty actually won a poetry competition when he was in his teens, but we're not buying that as proper justification for killing more trees. Doherty was expected to make the announcement himself yesterday, but was unable to make it due to a last-minute smack delivery. Instead, Orion editor Ian Preece was forced to rationalize on the young poet's behalf:

"From the early books a fascinating and very entertaining picture emerges of the young poet, broke in London, serving popcorn at the Prince Charles Cinema, dreaming of creating a band infused with the 'spirit of Albion'."

The diaries, which also make reference to his relationship with model Kate Moss, which ended last year, are: "Intimate, honest, very readable and very funny in places; pretty dark in others," Mr Preece said. The later pieces reflect "Pete's rise to fame, his changing world".

For the sake of sales, there's no question that Preece is praying for an overdose before the first printing.

Doherty Chronicles Rise to Fame With Book Deal [Independent]

Remainders: Shouldn't Shiloh Really Be Selling Condoms or the Pill?

Jessica — Wed, 14 Jun 2006 18:50:14 EDT

• People mag has a major opportunity for you, cash-throwing advertiser — placement of your ad space near Shiloh. Dodge takes the bait. Is there anything that baby can't sell? [LeftLane]
• Without Pete Doherty, would the British press simply cease to exist? Every single day, the crackhead inspires a new, stupid story. Today, he's found Jesus. Tomorrow, he'll have found another rusty syringe. [FF]
• Just another reason to loathe Bill O'Reilly, courtesy of his 10-room Manhasset estate. [Cryptome]
• A Suicide Girl attempts to spend 7 days straight in the Fifth Avenue Apple Store (open 24 hours). If David Blaine had any thunder, this might steal some of it. [SuicideGirls]
• It's kind of sad when construction workers would rather read the WSJ than ogle your ass. [Things That Make You Go Hmmm]
• Marc Jacobs dumps his boyfriend; not even the twink's Marc Jacobs tattoo could lube the relationship. [Towleroad]
• Way up at 158th Street rests Safety City, "a special place to how to cross streets, drive bicycles, and ride in cars safely." [Amish in the City]
• An extra to-do for you tonight: John Mayer will be testing his skills at the Comedy Cellar at 11 PM. His comedy skills, that is. Panty-throwing still appropriate. [BWE]
• Eva Longoria is determined to prove that she can be just as annoying through the written word, thus her forthcoming erotic novel, to be ghostwritten by the editors of Maxim. [BookStandard]
• In their defense, only porn is going to distract Katrina victims from their problems. [CNN]
• From the creators of the Greg Gutfeld Show comes Keira Knightley's Jaw, a blog documenting exactly that. Better than Keira Knightley's Pout, which just makes you want to punch things. [Keira Knightley's Jaw]

Breaking: Pete Doherty Goes on Holiday

Jessica — Thu, 01 Jun 2006 14:10:16 EDT

While New York frets about its safety in light of decreasing terror funds, there's trouble in Barcelona at this very moment:

Pete Doherty, singer with the band Babyshambles, has been detained aboard a flight to Barcelona after a syringe was found in the aeroplane toilet.

An airline spokesman said the captain of the easyJet flight from Gatwick radioed ahead to ask police to meet the flight at Barcelona's El Prat airport.

Police are currently searching the plane as it sits on the runway with 142 passengers aboard, according to the easyJet spokesman.

Good to see Europe is still fighting the war on terror, one suicide junky at a time.

Doherty Held After Syringe Found on easyJet Flight [Telegraph]

Remainders: In Reluctant Defense of Britney Spears

Jessica — Tue, 16 May 2006 19:30:42 EDT

• Though we spent all morning weeping for the beacon of bad parenting that is Britney Spears, we might now be able to dry our eyes. Turns out, she was doing nothing wrong — other than going out in curlers. [Jalopnik]
• Original Survivor Richard Hatch gets 51 months in jail for failing to pay taxes on his earnings. Lucky for him, the naked shtick will earn him all sorts of friends in prison. [TaxProf]
• David Patrick Columbia has an interesting blind item about a jet-setting socialite; even more than her identity, we'd love to know the name of the magazine editor who bends to her will. [NYSD]
• Happy birthday, Tucker Carlson! That makes 38 long years of douchebaggery, and many more to come. [Jossip]
• Meet the Popper Monster, the worst gay man to ever hit the dance floor. Also, he's probably your stockbroker. [Manhattan Offender]
• Only in New York would 39 gays assume we already have a gay newscaster on air. [NYM]
• Tragically, hipsters face discrimination from non-hipsters who happen to just look like hipsters. [YouTube]
• We didn't know it was even possible, but Pete Doherty continues to test the laws of the universe, growing more fucked up by the day. [Witz]

Gossip Roundup: Introducing Chardenade Heatherich

Jessica — Tue, 02 May 2006 12:18:15 EDT

• Because we're tired of typing out all their names, we're going to refer to the ongoing celebrity scandal du jour as Chardenade Heatherich (you translate it). So, today in Chardenade Heatherich news, fifth wheel David Spade slams Denise Richards for betraying Heather Locklear — who happens to be linked to Spade. [Page Six]
• Devil Wears Prada author Lauren Weisberger may be experiencing a career slowdown: After lagging sales for her second book, Everyone Worth Knowing, she's reportedly having difficulty starting her third book. And so Anna Wintour sticks another pin in her little cloth doll... [Lowdown]
• Pete Doherty claims that he was not injecting drugs into the arm of an unconscious young woman. Both he and the girl insist that she was conscious and Doherty was actually drawing her blood — which he was going to then use to paint pictures. We actually preferred the first version. [IOL]
• Is there anything Wilmer Valderrama won't attend? Now he's hosting a condo opening for Corcoran, to be followed by an after-party for the opening of a anthrax-filled envelope. [The Real Estate]
• Now that Rosie O'Donnell is headed to The View, Star Jones' ego might not be able to take it. Her agent is rumored to be calling around, though Jones is welcome to stay as long as she likes. For the sake of television savagery, let's pray Star stays. [Page Six]
• Despite having around 20 pieces in the Met Costume Institute's "Anglomania" exhibit, Malcom McLaren is unable to snare a gala invite from Her Frigidness. [R&M (2nd item)]

Gossip Roundup: Cuban Dictator May Also Be A Fan of Manchego Cheese, Marcona Almonds

abalk2 — Fri, 24 Mar 2006 10:08:18 EST

• Not content with going after Bob Schieffer's sloppy seconds, Katie Couric is now taking Laura Ingraham's as well. [Lowdown]
• Fidel Castro likes Serrano ham. This was Page Six's lead item. [Page Six]
• Crackhead Pete pleads guilty on seven counts of possession, kicks reporter. Ever feel like Crackhead Pete gets more done by 9 A.M. than you do all day? [NME]
• Britney Spears seen pounding shots. At this point her condition has been downgraded from "pregnant" to "gut." [R&M]
• Michael Jackson wants to meet, molest, extraterrestrials. Yeah, that's the joke we're going with for this one. [Lowdown (2nd item)]

Breaking: You Want to Look Like Pete Doherty

Jessica — Tue, 14 Mar 2006 10:42:11 EST

In an incredible scoop, today's Post informs us that crackhead rocker Pete Doherty is currently "the arbiter of cosmopolitan sartorial chic." While other generations get Coco Chanel and Jackie Kennedy as their fashion icons, we're stuck with the Olsens and Sienna Miller and, now, a British musician best known for the open sores covering his face. It just doesn't seem fair.

You know who to blame, of course: the magazine editors. GQ senior fashion and market editor Brian Coats claims that all the cool kids are dressing in Doherty's beyond-grunge style. He notes that the look can especially be found in Williamsburg and the Lower East Side — neighborhoods considered the birthplace of other such dapper ingenuities as the trucker hat and leggings. If you live in these areas, you might want to consider a move. Also, if you have a subscription to GQ, you might want to consider alleviating yourself of that problem.

Pure Heroin Chic [NYP]