195 Days and a Wake Up
Donald Trump Tried to Rally Pittsburgh by Asking About a Dead Enabler of Child Rape
Donald Trump held a rally in Pittsburgh last night. Does he know anything about Pittsburgh? The answer, I can definitively say, is: no. I’m certain of this because at the beginning of his speech, Trump held up a piece of paper and said, “I will tell you this: I asked, when I came over, gimme some stats on how…
6 Killed, Including Pregnant Woman, After Gunmen Open Fire on Pennsylvania Cookout
Eight people were shot—five fatally, including a pregnant woman—in a shooting at a backyard cookout in Wilkinsburg, Pennslyvania, on Wednesday night. According to the Associated Press, the medical examiner ruled the death of the fetus a homicide on Thursday, bringing the number of those killed to six.
One Brooklyn Gunrunner Allegedly Sold an Undercover Cop 112 Guns In a Year
Brooklyn district attorney Ken Thompson announced on Wednesday the arrest of eight men and women in three states, charged in a 541-count indictment for trafficking guns bought in Atlanta, Georgia, and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, to be sold in Brooklyn.
Sword-Swinging Robber Runs Up Against Store Owner With Bigger Sword
When two men, armed with one machete between them, ran into a Pittsburgh mini-mart Friday night with the intention of robbing it, they weren’t counting on the store owner having his own sword. And unfortunately for them, his was much, much bigger.
Bigoted Pennsylvania Teens Organize Day of Flannel-Wearing, Gay-Bashing
Following a Day of Silence in support of bullied LGBT teens, a group of anti-gay Pittsburgh-area high schoolers decided they were entitled to a special day of their own. In honor of “Anti-Gay Day,” they drew anti-gay slogans on their hands, wore matching flannel outfits, and, allegedly, created a “lynch list” of kids…
Cops: "Obsessed" Teacher Sent Thousands of Texts to 11-Year-Old Student
A former Pittsburgh elementary school teacher is accused of being "obsessed" with one of her 11-year-old students, sending the girl thousands of text messages over a period of two weeks, and planning to run away with (and possibly even adopt) her.
Police Chief Who Promised to "Challenge Racism" Responds to Angry Cops
On Friday, a police union president sent a blistering email to Pittsburgh's Chief of Police, writing, among other things, "your actions raise serious concerns" and "enough is enough!" The top cop's transgression? Being photographed with a sign reading "I resolve to challenge racism at work" and "#endwhitesilence."
Dear Jagoffs, Pittsburgh Officially Has the Ugliest Accent in America
After weeks of close contests and national debate, the fraught competition to decide America's ugliest accent has finally come to a dramatic close. And the winner is that moonlit, magical city—the Paris of Allegheny County, the Venice of the Ohio Valley—Pittsburgh, City of Jagoffs.
America's Ugliest Accent Has Come Down to Pittsburgh vs. Scranton
The people have spoken, and, damn, they sound terrible.
America's Ugliest Accent: Pittsburgh, Atlanta, Memphis, Philly
It's that time again: voting in round one of America's Ugliest Accent Tournament is about to begin. We can now give you the results of our prior days' matchups, which may serve to inform where your loyalties lie in today's rounds of voting. Nevertheless, please remember that city pride is important when it comes to…
Farm Names Specially Marked Calf After Accused Rapist
The Pittsburgh-area Vale Wood Farms got a special delivery just in time for Steelers Sunday this weekend: A brand new baby calf...with a "7" marked on its face! Farm owner Carissa Itle-Westrick named the lucky calf after Pittsburgh's other famous "7"—accused rapist Ben Roethlisberger.
Bane Crashed a Wedding During Dark Knight Rises Filming
When The Dark Knight Rises came to Pittsburgh back in 2011, a couple found their wedding at St. Paul's Cathedral taking place in the shadow of a necessary evil: Tom Hardy as Bane. The ceremony took place so close to the set that Gotham's reckoning even waved to the bridesmaids between takes.
America's Ugliest Accents Finally Get the Comedy Sketch They Deserve
Comedy Central's criminally underrated Kroll Show devoted most of last night's episode to a reality show pawn-porn parody called Pawnsylvania. In it, Nick Kroll's Philadelphian character swapped pawn shops with Jon Daly's Pittsburgher and verbal hideousness ensued. These accents are so hard to nail (I was flummoxed…
Three Shot at Pittsburgh High School
At least three people were wounded during a shooting at Brashear High School in Pittsburgh this afternoon. Two people were reportedly shot in the leg outside the school, and one was shot in the head inside the school's locker room. All three were rushed to local hospitals, though their injuries are believed to be…
Little Girl Spotted Riding in Cage with Dog; Mother: She Asked for It
The mother of a 10-year-old girl who was seen riding in the back of a pickup truck inside a dog cage is defending her decision to allow it, saying her daughter "wanted to be with her dog."
American Hero Arrested After Stealing Free Cakes
When most of us want to double down on free samples, we resort to trickery out of cowardice. We accept one mini hot dog, duck down another aisle, swap coats with a friend, put our hair in a ponytail, take off our glasses, then go back and accept another yelling, "OH, A FREE SAMPLE? WOW, I WONDER IF I WILL LIKE IT.…
Pittsburgh Hostage Taker is Posting Status Updates on Facebook [UPDATE]
Police in Pittsburgh have cordoned off a downtown high-rise where a hostage situation is currently unfolding.
How Did a Scarf-Wearing Pig End Up on a Highway Outside Pittsburgh?
A scarf-sporting pot-bellied pig held up drivers on the Parkway West outside Pittsburgh yesterday as it gave state troopers the run-around for a half-hour before escaping into the woods.
Shooter Rampages at University of Pittsburgh Psychiatric Clinic
At least five seven people have been shot at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center's Western Psychiatric Institute, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reports. Shortly after 2PM, the University alerted students and staff,
