Jumpy? Us? On the tenth anniversary of 9/11? Who's jumpy? Oh my god did you hear fighter jets got scrambled to intercept a flight headed to New York this is it we're all going to die oh god

It seems like we've heard every last story remotely connected to the events of 9/11. But I'd never heard this one: the one about the female fighter pilot who came thisclose to a patriotic suicide mission that day.

Gérard Depardieu was on an airplane with 100 other people and had to pee, but the flight attendant said he couldn't go until after takeoff. So the legendary French actor took matters into his own hands: He whipped out his dick and peed in the aisle. No, seriously:

It's always nice when an airplane articulates your thoughts for you—like the plane flying above Lower Manhattan today trailing a huge message: "THANKS FOR THE DOWNGRADE. YOU SHOULD ALL BE FIRED."

Memphis Imams Masudur Rahman and Mohamed Zaghloul had boarded a flight Friday morning when they were told the pilot wouldn't fly with them aboard. They were going to Charlotte—to attend a conference intended to "address prejudice against Muslims."

Two planes collided at JFK tonight when an Air France Airbus A380—the world's largest commercial passenger jet—clipped a much smaller plane while taxiing on the runway.

Southwest Airlines seems to have a problem keeping its planes together these days, so Discovery News thought it would be a good idea to ask some expert what would happen if you get sucked out of a plane. It's scary stuff.

John Travolta was rumored to fly Oprah and all her guests to Australia aboard a Qantas jet, but the airline's actual pilots are upset that the actor now appears in an in-flight safety video wearing a Qantas uniform.

Inspired, no doubt, by protests across the Middle East and North Africa, more than 100 students reportedly "mutinied" over baggage fees onboard a Ryanair flight from the Canary Islands. Alas, their revolution was quashed, and the students were removed.

These guys released 200 paper planes equipped with SD memory cards into space. Each has a message from someone somewhere in the world and were dropped 36,500 meters above Berlin.

Whoops! Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who's in Yemen for diplomatic talks, fell while getting into a plane today. She's fine, so don't worry! She was probably just drunk. Or maybe she's a klutz like the rest of us.

The FAA doesn't have important registration information for some 119,000 airplanes—about one-third of all planes in the U.S—thanks to missing or invalid forms. But they're just planes, right! I mean, what could possibly happen?

An anonymous cellphone video of Rep. John Conyers checking out Playboy's boobs and articles during a July flight has emerged, only days before weeks after the election! He could've at least waited until his wife reported to jail. Clip below.

Did you know that al-Qaeda in Iraq once surgically implanted bombs inside two stray dogs and tried to put them on a plane to the U.S.? Here's how to tell if your dog is a bomb-carrying al-Qaeda agent.

United Airlines unveiled a special Boeing 757 this morning to commemorate Oprah Winfrey's final season. The interiors were designed by the Queen of Daytime herself, and her signature graces the jet's tail. Unfortunately, Gayle is not the flight attendant.

Airports in New York and Philadelphia have gone on "high alert" thanks to a "suspicious" (but not explosive) package found on a US-bound UPS flight in the UK last night. Planes have reportedly been inspected in several cities already. [Reuters]

Last weekend, San Francisco played host to an air show. And while the Blue Angels were the stars, this incredible video—of a Boeing 747 flying just barely over the Golden Gate Bridge—is truly a sight to be seen.

Six passengers on a Russian airline were forced to stand in the aisles for their entire flight after the wrong airplane—one with too few seats—showed up at the airport. And no, it wasn't Southwest.

Ken Mehlman is the former GOP chairman who recently confirmed he was gay. Marc Maron is a comedian. Marc Maron has found himself sitting next to Ken Mehlman on a plane and is live-tweeting it. Guess what happened?