plaxico burress

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Oh, Plaxico

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Mediahohoho
12/02/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
Couldn't he have hired some flunky to take the rap for him? I hear Deion Sanders has a lot of free time.
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TenTimesFiltered
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
He should use the incredibly successful 'Lindsay Lohan-Cokepants' defense. They so weren't his pants.
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jgh
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico

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bjonston
12/01/08

@jgh: Hah hah!
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MrInBetween
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
THERE WAS BLOOD ON SAID PISTOL: The Plaxico AssClown Story
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Weegee's bored
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
Yo Plax dude, shooting an illegal firearm in a New York club does NOT automatically make you a rapper. If that's your new career path, you got to first acquire bodyguards, bling, SUV, bitches and hos, and gang signs ... and those tight pants have got to go!
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Steverino Begins
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
Btw, if you want to know how horrible NBC Local News is (in Jersey), this was the top story on Saturday night. They did a 10 minute segment at the top of the show, then a 5-minute segment at the end. In between was 15 minutes of filler on Christmas shopping.
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Phyllis Nefler
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
For whatever reason despite all the "stunts he's pulled" (to use my mother's parlance) I still have a soft spot for the big lug. LUV U PLAX MISS U EVERYDAY

I just hope that Pierce is OK. I'd kind of written Plax off for the season anyway (or at least marked him to market at steep discounts) but losing Pierce would be truly devastating.
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allyzay
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
the best part of this story is the allegation that he told hospital workers that his name was harris smith and he got shot in an applebee's, which of course prompted the inevitable "wtf you are plaxico burress, weirdo" responses. #1 bummer: nflshop.com has already added "h smith" to the no print list for custom jerseys!
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souplines
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
plaxico wacks his dough
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youranalogbuddy
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
It was the first time he managed to get around a safety all season...

(not an original but still!)
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Hiphopopotamus
12/01/08

@youranalogbuddy: Gawker readers don't get sports jokes...
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Kid Twist
12/01/08

@youranalogbuddy: That's a hockey reference, right?
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bjonston
12/01/08

@youranalogbuddy: I got it, and laughed out loud.
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youranalogbuddy
12/01/08

@bjonston: thanks! i was also thinking ...something something favorite target...something something tight end ... ? feel free to collaborate
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bjonston
12/01/08

@youranalogbuddy: Well, Plaxico was in the running for being one of the greatest wide receiver the Giants ever had until he shot himself in the foot.
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bjonston
12/01/08

@bjonston: But he's no longer in the running cause his legs are shot.
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youranalogbuddy
12/01/08

@bjonston: It's a real shame, because he was pretty much automatic on offense. Another one of the Giants' weapons gone this year. Between Osi and Strahan, it hurts to lose another high calibre guy.
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i'm a bottle
12/01/08

@Hiphopopotamus: So true.
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bjonston
12/01/08

@youranalogbuddy: Sine he was fidgeting in the area of the waistline of his pants, it sounds like he committed a neutral zone infraction, or an illegal use of hands. Five yard penalty. Repeat first down.
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BullfightsOnAcid
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
"Take me to a hospital... just as soon as I get my drink on. Cuz I'm a player!"
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misslinda
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
Oh yeah right, like he just calmly said "take me to a hospital". If I accidentally shot myself in the leg whilst holding a drink in my left hand and fidgeting in the area of my waistband with my right hand, the first thing I would do is ask for a second, stronger drink. Then I would curse loudly and often. Then and only then would I demand to be taken to the hospital, and I would most definitely go out swinging.
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bjonston
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
Well, what'd you expect? The guy's leg was like, all up in his grill, talking smack, whatchoo spect a self-respectin' football player to do but shoot that leg?
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Oy Veh (Informality Reigns)
12/01/08

@bjonston: I heard that fag leg tried to cop a feel..
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Oy Veh (Informality Reigns)
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
On the plus side, Now he's circumsized.
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Unfun
12/01/08

@oyvehisyou: I think he's a she now.
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bjonston
12/01/08

In reply to Oh, Plaxico
You know you're in trouble when you hear a pop after fidgeting in the area of the waistline of your pants.
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