This is the story of two popes. The first pope: a liberal pope who wanted to modernize the church. The second pope: a Communist-hater and the first non-Italian pope in over 4oo years. Today, a chill pope who is known for his chillness, made them saints.
Pope Francis is the chillest pope that the Vatican has ever seen: uttering "fuck" at weekly blessings, admiring chocolate statues of himself, picking up hitchhikers in his tricked-out Popemobile. But now the man in charge of thousands of precious documents wants the underlings of the internet to have access.
Late popes John Paul II and John XXIII will be made saints, the Catholic Church declared on Friday, conferring on both men a special "VIP status" that gives them discounts on select concession stand items and access to the shorter VIP line on all the rides.
On Wednesday, a bunch of old men vacationing in Italy selected an Argentine man named Jorge Bergoglio as America's Next Top Pope.
Book Claims Pope John Paul II Flagellated Himself Regularly.
The Italian press is full of reports that the Catholic Church will boycott the sequel to The Da Vinci Code, which will fail spectacularly as the latest marginal cultural wars led by the new Pope.
Sad news for fans of sophisticated financial swindles: Raffaello Follieri, the con man ex-boyfriend of pixie-like actress Anne Hathaway, has been sentenced to four and a half years in THE SLAMMER for defrauding various investors in his fake-ass imaginary company out of $2 million or so. The Post scored this sweet…
Billionaire Mayor Mike Bloomberg, reportedly outraged at new Pope Ratzi's refusal to guarantee the eternal salvation of Jews, atheists, homosexuals and vegans, is secretly plotting with a top aide to assume control of the Vatican sometime in 2010, Gawker has learned. Top Bloomberg aide Kevin Sheeky met in secret with…
