I love you so much, Brian. I am up for the day (+3) because I am not Serena. But I give myself +5 for not being Jenny, too. I hate her with the force of 1000 Chuck-in-Asian-pajamas rubdowns.
I give the show -8 for not making Chuck's dad all gray and ghosty. He didn't even say "woooo!" once! I mean, if we're gonna go there - have Chuckles writhe in ennui and be followed around by his dad - let's GO there. Have him ride around in a gray ghost limo, kick a gray ghost homeless guy, be followed by a pack of gray shifty ghost lawyers. He was a mogul, mofos!
Ok, I don't watch this show. I do occasionally catch 10 minutes of it when my girlfriend watches. Then I can't take it anymore and leave the room. So I don't know much, here.
That said, it seems to me that your rating system favors the most obnoxious and annoying characters on the show. I mean, that Chuck guy? Really? I want to choke him with a wooden spoon after watching him on screen for 3 minutes. And Blair? She's nearly as bad.
@lostarchitect: I have to disagree. While Chuck's intermittent newfound conscience is disheartening, I would still watch The Chuck and Blair show 100 times over versus any scene involving the blank/moping faces and insipid storylines of Serena, Rufus, or Vanessa.
I know Nate should be in that category, but he's just too pretty. And once in a while he gives those cute little looks to Dan that get my hopes up.
P.S. Bryan, the "Serena Bonus" addition is amazing.
@HollyQE2: I guess the thing is that I don't know the story line, so I'm only reacting to the characters themselves, sans story. And fuck, Chuck is ridiculous and annoying. Ugh, and those faces he makes... Not that Serena's not annoying, I just find her less so.
@Brian Moylan: Agreed. I find Chuck to be perfect in every way because I am mesmerized by his everything. Even with a side of Ghost Dad I wanted to bone him until his mysterious mother comes home.
@lostarchitect: When you started with "OK, I don't watch this show," I knew your critique wouldn't mean much. Then you dissed both Chuck AND Blair and proved me right.
Gossip Girl is all about the lesser of two evils. Spend a little more time with Vanessa and Serena, and then you'll understand. Or don't, and save yourself a lifetime of pain for having to put up with their awful, easy-to-hate-and-make-fun-of characters.
@chickachicka: Well, yeah, the fact that I don't know what's going on is really the whole point of what I was saying, and I wasn't critiquing so much as asking, "what the hell is going on here?"
Anyway, you're right, this show would drive me crazy if I watched it. Evidently, the characters I hated immediately are the most likable on the show! If the others are even LESS likable with more time spent viewing, there's no way I could watch without poking myself in the eyes repeatedly.
@lostarchitect: But see, we love Chuck and Blair because they are awesome. And we love Serena, Vanessa, Jenny, and the rest for being so incredibly stupid that they give us something to make fun of while loving C&B Music Factory. That makes the show completely lovable, even when you hate it.
I stopped watching this show after season 1, more or less because I got lazy.
And this recap makes that more than okay.
Serena: has an Archie Comics character quality to her - aside from some very vague traits (cleavage, rich), they just tack on whatever lines/personality bits are convenient for the storyline. Glorious! (When viewed from afar)
I'd like to award last night's episode with the title of "Most Unrealistic GG Episode ever," something which has hitherto been seemingly impossible to achieve. Why? you ask. Let me count the ways.
1) Serena knows who Barney Frank is? Sure.
2) WTF was with everyone asking about "Nassau County"? Say it with me: "Long Island."
3) Yes, Vanessa, you must come to the hospital at once! Even though you and Serena have never been anything close to resembling friends! And no one even likes you!
4) And why do you insist on believing that Paul Hoffman (is that his name?) is straight? HE ISN'T.
5) Really, Trip? You left a girl behind who was obviously going to wake up shortly and be able to tell all, even though your accident was a result of avoiding animals and not alcohol? Either "asshole" is your default mode or you are the most poorly written character ever.
6) THAT was how Jenny and Eric ended their feud? Two seconds of "I don't want to play Frenemies anymore"? Screw that.
@DahlELama: This is why GossipGirl is no longer on my TiVo.
That and 'Skins' (seasons 1 and 2) showed me that someone could do a properly written and completely fun teen drama that didn't make me want to take my eyes out.
@flaxen_vixen: YES. Also, the conversation between Rufus and the co-op chick. Also, pretending that Rufus would've gone to hit up the co-op chick instead of lingering in the apartment to make Lily talk about the letter. UGH, so much crappiness!
@DahlELama: And who, who in their RIGHT MIND would choose milksoppy, ineffectual, asexual Trip over Nate?? Even with all the mascara and blush Chase Crawford is wearing on the show, he still emits more testosterone than that other character ever could-- even if you sprayed him down with pheromones and made him wear plaid flannel. Trip gives me the skeeves...
@pony_express: Right?? I am loving Nate lately; it's like Chace Crawford took an acting workshop on the Internet. Trip looks like someone who should be on So You Think You Can Dance.
@DahlELama: Yeah, I loved how Trip thought no one would know there was anyone besides Serena in the car. There's only a bloody, DNA-filled head-crack in the windshield on the passenger side.
"Serving up a side of boobs at Thanksgiving dinner: -1, Seriously, it's a lace-front, skin-tight jumpsuit. How is that in any way appropriate for a family dinner outside of New Jersey: -2"
You forgot the cameltoe, providing what her skirts threaten to every week. The wardrobe people clearly don't like her and have made a game out of how they can skank her up while pretending it's "high fashion" because it's some designer.
That jumpsuit was an affront to the Thanksgiving tradition, fashion, my eyeballs, and the eyeballs of my unborn children. Gossip Girl stylists, please make it stop.
While we are talking about Serena wearing inappropriate work clothes, can we also discuss that black dress she was wearing? Long sleeved and not low cut - I was shocked to see everything tucked away. Then we see the dress from behind to find the back is cut out and she isn't wearing a bra. Way to go, S! Ugh.
As for Jenny - PLEASE, YES. I agree about the drugs. I want nothing more than to see her have the Jessie Spano equivalent of the 2000's. #gossipgirl
12/08/09
I give the show -8 for not making Chuck's dad all gray and ghosty. He didn't even say "woooo!" once! I mean, if we're gonna go there - have Chuckles writhe in ennui and be followed around by his dad - let's GO there. Have him ride around in a gray ghost limo, kick a gray ghost homeless guy, be followed by a pack of gray shifty ghost lawyers. He was a mogul, mofos!
12/08/09
That said, it seems to me that your rating system favors the most obnoxious and annoying characters on the show. I mean, that Chuck guy? Really? I want to choke him with a wooden spoon after watching him on screen for 3 minutes. And Blair? She's nearly as bad.
So, what's your strategy here?
12/08/09
12/08/09
I know Nate should be in that category, but he's just too pretty. And once in a while he gives those cute little looks to Dan that get my hopes up.
P.S. Bryan, the "Serena Bonus" addition is amazing.
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
Gossip Girl is all about the lesser of two evils. Spend a little more time with Vanessa and Serena, and then you'll understand. Or don't, and save yourself a lifetime of pain for having to put up with their awful, easy-to-hate-and-make-fun-of characters.
12/08/09
Anyway, you're right, this show would drive me crazy if I watched it. Evidently, the characters I hated immediately are the most likable on the show! If the others are even LESS likable with more time spent viewing, there's no way I could watch without poking myself in the eyes repeatedly.
Also, Brian might be right about the boobs.
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
And this recap makes that more than okay.
Serena: has an Archie Comics character quality to her - aside from some very vague traits (cleavage, rich), they just tack on whatever lines/personality bits are convenient for the storyline. Glorious! (When viewed from afar)
12/08/09
1) Serena knows who Barney Frank is? Sure.
2) WTF was with everyone asking about "Nassau County"? Say it with me: "Long Island."
3) Yes, Vanessa, you must come to the hospital at once! Even though you and Serena have never been anything close to resembling friends! And no one even likes you!
4) And why do you insist on believing that Paul Hoffman (is that his name?) is straight? HE ISN'T.
5) Really, Trip? You left a girl behind who was obviously going to wake up shortly and be able to tell all, even though your accident was a result of avoiding animals and not alcohol? Either "asshole" is your default mode or you are the most poorly written character ever.
6) THAT was how Jenny and Eric ended their feud? Two seconds of "I don't want to play Frenemies anymore"? Screw that.
12/08/09
That and 'Skins' (seasons 1 and 2) showed me that someone could do a properly written and completely fun teen drama that didn't make me want to take my eyes out.
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/08/09
12/02/09
12/01/09
12/01/09
12/01/09
You forgot the cameltoe, providing what her skirts threaten to every week. The wardrobe people clearly don't like her and have made a game out of how they can skank her up while pretending it's "high fashion" because it's some designer.
12/01/09
11/17/09
As for Jenny - PLEASE, YES. I agree about the drugs. I want nothing more than to see her have the Jessie Spano equivalent of the 2000's. #gossipgirl
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09
11/17/09