Why do people go to grad school? It all depends. In "the humanities," people generally go to grad school because they like to smoke marijuana, or because they dislike the prospect of finding a "real job," or—and this one is key to the whole grad school house of cards—because they "want to teach." The elusive and …

Last weekend, the Washington Post ran an op-ed insinuating that college professors might not "work hard enough," citing high average salaries and relatively low workloads for full-time professors. True? Untrue? It doesn't matter. (Except to academia [=boring].) When it comes to winning these public debates, all that…

Michigan State art professor Danny Guthrie recently just finished an art project where he photographed himself in varying states of undress, caressing the naked bodies of "former and current students." Time to rev up the ol' campus controversy machine!

Newt Gingrich is just a factory of rich, intellectual, stimulating ideas that no one has ever considered before, as Newt Gingrich is the only person who meets the intelligence threshold necessary to conceive him. Gingrich himself has been telling us this for 30 years, and finally — finally — we cretins have agreed to…

Here's what stupid uneducated people imagine that college literature professors do: teach. Har har, stupid ignorant idiots! Here is what college literature professors actually do: write obscure papers that nobody will read. Now that's where it's at!

Hip hop culture is a very deserving field of study. Rap lyrics are some of the most powerful popular poetry of the past three decades. Studying rap music in a classroom is kind of a drag compared to studying rap music, say, in a car full of weed smoke, but hey, it's not the worst thing you could do in a classroom.

Earlier this week, we told you about the case of Phillip Garber (seen in the video above), the precocious 16 year-old college student whose professor asked him not to speak in class because of his stuttering problem. Wholly predictable outrage ensued! Now, the professor is defending herself. Let's listen!

Sometimes, the very most basic facts of a story are all that's necessary to see the colossal outpouring of public rage that is sure to follow. As in this case! College professors: do not order a student in your class who stutters not to speak in class, ever.

Cameron Johnston is a professor of social sciences at York University in Canada. He is Jewish. But the bad part is, he's also a Nazi! Fire him at once! Wait... what did he say?

College students: will they ever be able to judge political bias with any accuracy? No, they haven't even decided whether Ayn Rand or Chinua Achebe is cooler yet! So it's no surprise they think every gay teacher is biased.

Physics professor David C. Flory, of Fairleigh Dickinson University, is in police custody after he was arrested on 40 counts of promoting prostitution. The allegedly pimping professor was nabbed while sitting at a Starbucks in Albuquerque.

College professors hate when their students are distracted by laptops in class so much that it occasionally results in assault charges. Some professors have gone so far as to spy on their students to figure out what they're up to on their computers.

Is teach pale, a beached whale? A new study out of the normally conscientious nation of Canada indicates that assistant professors in that peaceful nation's institutes of higher learning are woefully deficient in the "Fourth R": exercise.

At the University of Iowa, a campus-wide email from the College Republicans touting their "Conservative Coming Out Week" (sample: "Conservatives in Iowa City it is now time to come out of the closet!") prompted one professor to Start a Dialogue:

We must beg your apologies for a brief delay in bringing you the very latest news in College Professor In-Class Sex Demonstration Scandals, but we think you'll be pleased with the most recent developments in the field. Jack Rappaport, an assistant professor of management at La Salle University in Philly, has been…

The Internet has been enraged in the past few days over the sad tale of William Cronon, a well known history professor at the University of Wisconsin who suddenly finds Republican operatives trying to dig through his private email.

What with the alarming recent pseudotrend of racism permeating college campuses, we'd be remiss if we didn't bring you up to speed on this late-breaking story from Friday: Mark Wattier (pictured, atop horse), a political science professor at Murray State University, has decided to retire after being suspended by the…

Today we heard about a jerky college professor who blabbed about a student's business to the whole class. Professors can be so mean sometimes! Especially according to one commenter, at least. Read their story, then tell us your own.

A professor at Aalborg University has been reprimanded after being taped participating in an orgy in which "four men wearing monk robes" had sex with a woman in one of the university's machine rooms. The orgy itself wasn't the problem.