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more about #explanations more comments → ZiggyStardust: Poor Denton, he gets blamed for everything. No wonder his head is so large, it's obviously because of this complex he now has. more » RandomLunatic: Sho and Black are currently part of a big eBay ad campaign. It's a decent campaign as those go, too, basically letting them be themselves in very shor... more » Rozelle’s Bagman: I really wanted to see "3 accused of gang rape in monroeville" under the Chelsea Clinton foto. more » Tattertotter: Excuse me while I kiss this guy's box. more » DennyCrane: Can you cycle some photos of others members of The State into the skybox instead? more » Beau Nerd: I love it. [...] IloveitIloveitIloveitIloveitIl...! more » son of spam: How am I supposed to not work with this sort of distraction? more » Spirit Fingers: Really thought it was some cool new thang you guys were doing. I was about to suggest you add a few pics of Sam Worthington in there. #thingswedidn't... more » Foster Kamer: Anything that puts my shit in the "more about" box is cool with me. more » Airvault: No apology necessary. I've had a smile on my face all morning. I love these guys. more » TheSometimesWhy: In Halderman's defense, the idea for the screenplay based on Dave boning the intern was his "B" pitch--his "A" pitch was a biopic of the life of Larry... more » miss_msry: His plot is working. I'd pay $2 million not to see Dave dicking an intern on the silver screen. #davidletterman more » TheBusinessGuy: Hey, if Dave testifies in open court, will he bring along Paul Shaffer and the CBS Orchestra to provide rim shots and snide interjections? #davidlette... more » SidAndFinancy: "And blackmail was just a casting suggestion!" #davidletterman more » Edward Lionheart: Hey, if you want to pitch, you gotta get in the door somehow, right? I think it was worth a shot.... Hey Spielberg, I know about you and that actress.... more » -
#explanations
Seriously, He Just Wanted to Sell Letterman a Screenplay
This whole alleged David Letterman "extortion" plot? All a big misunderstanding. More » -
#movies
Tucker Max Has an Explanation
Schlitz-grasping cargo short sporter Tucker Max has finally figured out why his movie, Penis in a Beer Cozy, was a financial failure.
More »
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#therich
Giuseppe Cipriani, Hero Liberal
Giuseppe Ciprianifledleft the country last year in the wake of a scandal over alleged shady dealings regarding a liquor license for his celebtastic restaurant. He's not "on the lam," see. He simply could not take Bush any longer. More » -
#advertising
David Spade Explains: He Really Needed the Money
David Spade, a real human with a real human heart, is so wounded by the criticism of his new ad "starring" his dead pal Chris Farley that he's come forth with a heartfelt statement from his flack. More » -
#heroes
Baghdad Shoe Hurler: Journalistic Role Model
Let's not forget that the hero Iraqi Shoe Hurler was a journalist before he became a footwear projectilist. A certain portion of his colleagues think he disgraced his profession. They're wrong. Let's go to Muntader's brand new explanatory op-ed! More » -
#omg
Arizona Children as Young as 12 Think Vodka Red Bull Anus Tampons Are 'Cool'
Arizona has been on a crazy streak this week. Judge not, coastal elites; if you had vodka in your tampons and crystal meth in your highlighter, you'd be crazy too. More » -
#explanations
We Were Attacked By Dastardly Hackers!
Well here's your last (Hopefully!) technical difficulties update: According to a memo sent out tonight by our IT team, the recent Gawker Media server problems were the result of a DDOS attack against Consumerist. [Image via] -
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#explanations
They Dropped Off Too Many Kids at the Pool
The swim club in Philadelphia that turned away some African-American day campers fearing their presence would "change the complexion" of the pool, now says that over-crowding was the real issue and it all had "nothing to do with race." [NBC] -
#explanations
We Just Can't Quit Mark Sanford
A reader passed along a quote from Mark Sanford she ran across in an April edition of Time: "I think the fatal flaw of a lot of people in politics is that they want to be loved." Ha! [Time] -
#explanations
Sun Reports Michael Jackson Collapsed After a Demerol Injection
Rupert Murdoch's Sun coaxed some paramedics and UCLA hospital employees into talking anonymously about Michael Jackson's death today, and according to those sources, Jackson collapsed shortly after an injection of the painkiller Demerol. More » -
#explanations
Danny DeVito Addresses His Proclivity for Public Drunkenness
Danny DeVito was a guest on Letterman's show last night and Letterman took the opportunity to ask DeVito about his most recent episode of public drunkenness. More » -
#diversity
Black Guy Photoshopped In
Oh. Oh no. Oh no they didn't. Today in "Onion Stories Come True": The city of Toronto adds some diversity—magically! More » -
#explanations
Maureen Dowd Admits to an Act of Accidental Plagiarism
Yesterday we learned that an entry in Maureen Dowd's Sunday Times column appeared to be lifted straight from a blog post by TPM's Josh Marshall on Thursday. Last night, Dowd admitted to plagiarizing Marshall. More » -
#explanations
Washington Times Explains Obama Girls Photo Flap
Yesterday we told you about how the Washington Times ran a photo of the Obama girls with a story about schoolchildren being murdered in Chicago. Outrage ensued. Now we have the Times' explanation. More » -
#explanations
Why didn't SEC employees catch Bernie Madoff? Porn browsing. [ProPublica]
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#oldmen
Tom Wolfe Explains Hip Hop
Friend of the commoner Tom Wolfe is all white on the outside. But don't judge. The Observer caught up with the fancy author and had him explain what the rappers are talking about (SEX): More » -
#explanations
No Way Bush Is Letting Obama's Narcs Shut Down His Shindigs
More details have emerged on how the White House is bravely defending the DC area from the freeloading Obama family and their rowdy entourage. No adults allowed, it's neocon party time! More »
