Gawker: Rapists

Schizophrenia Is The New Ad Gimmick

Joshua Stein — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 14:25:24 EST

Walking westward on Prince St. between Mulberry and Mott Streets, I heard a woman's voice in my head whispering, "Who's there? Who's there?" Not like I "heard" a woman's voice like when I wear flared jeans with skinny shoes and I "hear" a woman's voice in my head say, "Wait, you've got to be kidding?" but like an actual woman's voice in my head. This usually means I've had a psychotic break.

But! Then I noticed that, above a billboard for some A&E show called Paranormal State were some speakers that looked like hypersonic sound beams, a device which uses your skull as a speaker—that is, it transmits soundwaves that resonate against whatever surface they hit.

So when they hit your head, it sounds like the call is coming from the inside the brain-house.

The billboard says 73% of Americans believe and I'm assuming that that means 73% of Americans believe in ghosts. So if that's true, why try to convert the skeptical/not crazy 27% by beaming voices into their heads? That's just greedy. Also it leads to a lingering sense of serious mental violation. How soon will it be until in addition to the Do Not Call list, we'll have a Do Not Beam Commercial Messages Into My Head list?

America's Most Smartest Model Also Most Rapiest

Joshua Stein — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 10:40:57 EDT

Apparently there's a television show on VH1 called America's Most Smartest Model in which a group of models live together and strive to perform basic tasks like eating and exercising and trying not to sexually assault each other. The winner receives $100,000 and the title "America's Most Smartest Model." For one of the contestants, a Russian named Andre Birleanu, the eating and exercising were fine, but that last part he had some trouble with.

The 25-year-old model was at Cipriani Downtown when, according to a young lady:

"He touched my genitalia and I immediately moved away," she said. "Then I looked over, and he looked really upset.... I went up to him. And he was standing there with his head down. He said something along the lines of 'no.'

"He then grabbed my boob."

In his own defense, Mirleanu said, "I already slept with that girl, so it's strange she would say I touched her inappropriately." Oh right, we forgot, once you sleep with someone they are yours forever! Another fun fact about Andre. When he was arrested, he was out on bail after being charged with stalking, aggravated harassment and attempted assault; in 2003, he spent 6 months at Rikers. What Would Tyra Say???

Reality Hunk In Sex Bust [NYP]

'Radar' v. Richard Johnson: It Is So On!

Emily Gould — Tue, 16 Oct 2007 16:56:28 EDT

"Emasculated? We'll See!" was the headline of the Page Six item this morning that basically told New York magazine's Vanessa Grigoriadis to watch what she said about that venerable gossip institution, because the males of Page Six would totally rape her... except maybe not because she's so darn hairy and ugly. Charming. Not to mention completely out of proportion! Grigoriadis's claim—that the column was "emasculated" after former Sixer Jared Paul Stern was accused of trying to blackmail supermarket magnate and (whatever, alleged) Radar investor Ron Burkle, wasn't even that controversial. And Richard Johnson's move to cover his ass by whipping out his dick, as it were, seems to have completely backfired.

There are not one but two items on Radar today about Johnson, one about the Grig slur and another pointing to Johnson's seeming favor-trading with Joe Francis, who he may have witnessed getting up to his rapey old tricks at Johnson's bachelor party.

Days before Johnson's April 8, 2006, nuptials to Sessa von Richthofen, Johnson and crew were crashed out in the living room of Francis's $25 million, 13-bedroom estate in Punta Mita, Mexico, nursing hangovers when the porn auteur came home and disappeared into a bedroom with a young woman. Eyewitnesses say later that morning the young woman burst out of Francis's boudoir, groggy, crying, and yelling, "That motherfucker raped me!" She staggered off saying her boyfriend in Oklahoma was a lawyer who would "sue the fuck out of" Francis.

Johnson and fellow revelers were left dumbstruck. But Francis—who has been accused of procuring underage prostitutes, promoting sexual performances from children, drug trafficking, racketeering, and rape—was quick to calm their nerves. "Guys, relax," he told Johnson and others, according to witnesses. "We're in Mexico."

Wonder what sort of retaliation will be in Page Six tomorrow morning!

Previously: Dispatch From The Gossip Wars