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recaps
Real World Cancun: At Least You Weren't Adopted!
This week was the Cleaning episode. It was also the Blowdown episode. And it was the Let's Watch the Roommate Who Won an Online Contest to Be Here Alienate Herself and Yell At Everyone episode. So many episodes in one! More » -
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NYC Prep: Winter Break My Heart
What is it about Mexico that provokes such drama from reality shows? There's sandy, stupid Real World. The Cabo adventures of the Hills gang. The lonely journey of Danielle from Jersey (mostly made up by me). And now, PC. More »
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Comment by Spirit Fingers: Feck! I was in a MJ stupor and completely forgot about one of the best comic parodies on television. Will... 7 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
Real World Cancun: Please Don't Spit In My Taco
Oh, Mexico. Land of sand and ruins. Place of history and blood. Of vines and mountains. Mexico: where you can get drunk at a laser lightshow nightclub and then spit in your roommate's taco and no one bats an eyelash. More » -
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NYC Prep: Embarrassment of the Riches
There was a moment on NYC Prep last night that was just so brutal, so true-to-life, that I feel I just have to get it out of my system and talk about it right now. Camille and her teeth. More »
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Comment by quatrevingtquatre: It is cruel to give us these awesome recaps with the knowledge that THEY ARE CEASING AT THE END OF... 12 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
Real World Cancun: The Y'alls of Montezuma
Like an ocean breeze mingling with the scent of cheap fajitas, last night the Real World: Cancun swept into our lives. Not with a bang or a whimper, but some strange harmony in between. Yes, I said harmony! More » -
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NYC Prep: You Don't Know How It Feels to Be Me
Well, great TV spirits be thanked/damned, it finally arrived. NYC Prep! The show about Real Life rich kids who are real life Girls who sometimes Gossip. Even the two boys, Sebastian and PC, are Girls. Who Gossip. Let's talk. More »
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Comment by CeCeF1: I started watching and for the first time for something like this, I had to stop. I remember how awful... 6 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
Real Housewives of New Jersey: You Wouldn't Like Teresa When She's Angry
Things disappear so quickly these days. They just fleet past, like car lights out on the Turnpike. I'm speaking, of course, of the premature end of Real Housewives of New Jersey, a show that we'd only just gotten to know. More » -
top chef
Top Chef: Masters Spies on Girl Scouts, Snoops In Dorm Rooms
Hello. My name is Joshua David Stein. I think we should probably talk about what happened last night on Bravo's Top Chef: Masters. It was at once heartwarming and a little creepy. More »
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By Joshua SteinComment by The Lone Scout: Kelly Choi started out on public television in the Gotham City, but even then she aimed big. She hosted "Eat... 2 Responses | Other threads
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Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Gorge Between Tasteful and Tacky
What does one do with bubbies? Does one shake them and quake them and hopefully not break them? Or do they just dangle and bulge, like boats or balloons? We sought to find the answers to these questions last night. More » -
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Real Housewives of New Jersey: A Criminal's Guide to the Garden State
Martha Graham once said that "dance is a song of the body. Either of joy or pain." Last night's New Jersey deep dive proved her sage point. There was joy and there was pain, but also there was dancing. More » -
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The Hills: The Death and Birth of Lauren Conrad
Well that, I guess, is it. The last we'll see of old Lauren "LC" Conrad on The Hills, the reality dynasty that she helped build with her own two well-groomed hands. How did it all go down? Well, like any good comedy, it ended with a wedding. More » -
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Real Housewives of New Jersey: We're Talking About Blowjobs
I can't with this show. I really just can't. I mean, these are people? These are people? Last night an alien was murdered while her friends watched, two teenage girls fell off a cliff, and then everyone died. I mean, that's basically what happened. More » -
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The Hills: Love Means Having to Grudgingly Say You're Sorry
The pen is indeed mightier! In fact, the pen is ultimate. Which is to say, last night was the second-to-last episode of The Hills this season, calloo callay. As any good second-to-last episode is, it was all setup for the dramatic finale next week. So let's sift through the setup. More » -
recaps
The American Idol Finale: Everybody Loves Kris
Well, that's it. After all this tumbling and mumbling and Kara bumbling, the eighth and most bespangled season of American Idol yet has come to a screeching, crooning end. How'd it end for you? Are you satisfied? Surprised? Gassy? To work through all these emotions and sensations, let's discuss. More » -
recaps
American Idol: Guy Next Door vs. Guyliner
Oh Ryan, you master of the turn of phrase. Clever little frosted minx. I'm gonna miss you when they pack you back up into your E! radio locker and I don't get any of you until next January. Sigh. The last competition night of the year! It was... just aight. More » -
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Real Housewives of New Jersey: A Palace Made of Marble and Makeup
You guys? I think I have to confess something here right at the start. No offense to my beloved O.C. harpies and my bankable New York climbers, but the New Jersey broads might be my favorite of all the Housewives. More » -
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The Hills: Steve Martin Shoots Spencer Pratt In the Face
The Hills has fallen victim to the recession. Yes, a single job loss has swept the dusty mounds, and, presumably, has blown over the actual hills as well. We weep for Handbags, deprived of employ. More » -
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Gossip Girl: The Five People You Meet in High School Hell
Graduation is kind of the most anticlimactic day of high school. There it is just sorta... there. You don't feel different, you just feel bored and pandered to. At least I did last night. More » -
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The Real Housewives Reunion: The Time of Our Lives
Last night was Part Two of The War of the Grosses, alternately titled the Real Housewives of New York City reunion special. It was: ladies yelling in an echoing room while a gay dude sighed. More » -
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American Idol: Victory Over the Dan
Have you ever had an angel burp on you? Ever felt the soothing hand of God as He gives you a purple nurple? If not, then you didn't watch American Idol last night. More » -
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American Idol: The Unholy Trinity
Three is a number steeped in magic and myth—the three fates spinning our doom, the three versions of Jesus (dad, son, creepy ghost), the three bears. And now, the three Idol men. Heroes all. More » -
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Real Housewives of New Jersey: Make Our Garden State Grow
We took that turn! Whistling through tunnels, sailing o'er the bridge. We blinked our eyes, suddenly out of the city, in a new, strange place that the Indians named New Jersey, a thousand years ago. More » -
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The Hills: The Trip to Satan's Dungeon
That wisp dancing up into the azure sky isn't smoke from the Fire of Santa Barbara. No, it's bits of the dearly departed soul of Spencerina, fleeting up to heaven to make handbags with God. More » -
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OMG House Last Night!!
Last night on tv's Dr House, MD, House finally slept with Cuddy!! But it turned out that he didn't. SPOILER ALERT: this made the internet, and Times critic Gina Bellafante, feel very :( More »
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By PareeneComment by allyzay: I WAS GOING TO WATCH THIS ON TIVO TONIGHT, AND I DIDN'T KNOW, THANKS FOR RUINING MY ENTIRE LIFE ASSHOLE 10 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
Gossip Girl: The 80's Were Just Like Today, Only Much Worse
Oh look. The CW built us a time machine. And, hey, a date's already programmed in. It says "sometime in the 1980's." Huh. That's sorta vague and unfocused. Oh well. Let's step in. More » -
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God Damn American Idol
Are you happy with yourselves, America? Satisfied yet? This is what you wanted, right? A bunch of thick, charmless white guys for your Top 3? Well you got it! More » -
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American Idol: YAAAAAAGGGHAHGH!!!
Richard is... dead, maybe? Richard is in heaven, with Barack Obama's mom and Danny Gokey's wife. Either that or France. Regardless, he did not watch American Idol last night. But we did! More » -
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The Real Housewives of New York Meet Their Ends
Your beloved recapper Richard Lawson was in Paris for the finale of the Real Housewives of New York City which aired last night. I, Joshua David Stein am filling, the best I can, that void. More »
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By Joshua SteinComment by pmarble: It's not Richard, but kudos for the effort -- or as Ramona said last night, kha-doos. Man oh Manischewitz. 10 Responses | Other threads
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Gossip Girl: Sooty Sextopia
In our continuing series of guest recappers, we present a mysterious woman known only as Octavia Thundersnatch who braved one hour of insipid TV so you didn't have to. More » -
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The Hills: The Week 'Skankily' Entered the Lexicon
Richard is off tra-la-la-ing through Paris this week and for some reason MTV still decided to air an episode of The Hills. Guest recapping the MTV abomination is hero Megan Kustra. Be nice to her. More » -
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The Most Dramatic Rose Ceremony in American Idol History
That's how you do Idol! I mean, that's how you do it. Manufacture "surprises" so people will keep watching a full hour of television that should only take five minutes. Did your jaw drop? More » -
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Real Housewives: The Brooklyn Sex Dungeon and Other Adventures
The penultimate Housewives! With tales of rejuvenation and renewal, discord and disharmony. But mostly tales of women on the verge—about to pop or explode, to shit or get off the pot. How'd it go? More »
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Comment by Excusado: A few great moments in the show last night that you didn't mention so I will: *Marty Markowitz attended Silex's party! *Lunz... 7 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
The Hills: Each and Every One a Virgin
Go tell Isabella Rossellini that we've found the saddest music in the world. It's the sound of a dozen idiots chirping on The Hills. Last night, there was bible study. On The Hills. Religion! More » -
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Gossip Girl: No One Ever Leaves New York
Gossip Girl!! What did you doooo??? Last night's episode definitely stepped on some toes, what with its swift plotting and actual things happening. Josh Schizzy must be pissed, yo. Queller, was this your doing? More » -
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American Idol: Disco Ain't the Only Thing That's Dead
Oh American Idol Season Eight. You're showing your age. Two more dreamers were sent packing last night, they were—just by coincidence probably!—the two most conspicuously brown of the bunch. Obama Era nothing, huh? More » -
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American Idol: Disco? Balls.
So Disco Night happened on American Idol. Everyone still with us? Ten toes, ten fingers? All right, good. We made it. That wasn't so bad, was it? I mean, it could have been much worse. More » -
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Real Housewives: The Scariest Halloween Of Your Life
A Halloween episode of Real Housewives of New York City is awfully redundant, isn't it? Costumery, scary skeleton people, the ache in your tooth from too much junk? That's every week on this miserable show! More »
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Comment by somethingsfishy: kelly's boobs....anyone?? i know this has been done before....but these were the worst....ever 10 Responses | Other threads
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recaps
The Hills: Working Hard to Make a Better World for None of Us
In 1974, the great Studs Terkel published Working: People Talk About What They Do All Day and How They Feel About What They Do. In 2009, Handbags Pratt, an idiot gypsy, finally went to work. More » -
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Gossip Girl: Serena and Dan Hate the Jews
What is Gossip Girl? Is it shadow? Is it light? Is it some dusky energy in between, full of whispers and haunts and newborn ghosts? Maybe. But it's also just a silly TV show. OK: More » -
recaps
The Most Important American Idol In History
The fuck? The long-threatened veto was finally exercised last night. On Lil! Wait, no. On Gokey! Oh, hm, not that either. On Matt Giraud. Really, Irdol? A season's worth of build-up for... Matt Giraud. More »
recaps
New York, 7:45 PM
Fri Jul 10
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