The former musician who lives in Waco, Texas was interviewed for a paper in Phoenix, a collection of drive-thru latte stands and regional theatre stages in Arizona. For some reason he got hilariously riled up with the interview, a hapless shmo named Martin Cizmar. It's like Deliverance but over the phone. Choice bits below:

UP: How do you make rock n roll and conservative politics fit together?

TN: How old are you, Martin?

UP: I'm 28.

TN: Then you haven't the faintest fucking idea...[Rush Limbaugh] had a prescription drug problem for a period of time. But, in the final analysis, is Rush in the asset column or the liability column. Did he learn from his mistakes or didn't he?

UP: I don't know. I don't know him.

TN: You call yourself as journalist and you don't know that?

UP: I don't know him personally, I don't know where he is personally.

TN:... Martin, I gotta tell you, when I see you I'm going to have slap the shit out of you. I'll buy you a mocha, then I'll knee-cap you. Because that is so soulless. What a far-reaching fantasy.

...Martin. Did you go to college, are you in college, did you graduate from college?"

UP: Oh yeah.

TN: Did they ever tell you about the Bataan Death March in college? Did they ever tell you about how the trains lined up in Nuremburg in '37 and '38 and took people to Auschwitz, to the internment camps, and then ultimately to their death? Did they ever tell you about the Japanese emperor who gathered up Japanese little girls for the army to rape and torture and murder so they could get in the right frame of mind for war. My point is: In the absence of the most evil moments in human history you can pretend those moments didn't happen, so you can pretend that certainly no human would ever force another human to be unarmed and helpless. Unfortunately, there are people in America, there are people in politics, there are people in positions of authority, who want to forcibly unarm, and force in to helplessness, American citizens. That's what this is all about... None of the politicians who want gun control - they can't claim ignorance - they all know that forced unarmed helplessness is a guaranteed victim orgy. They know that. So, they can't claim ignorance, they are either evil to the core or just deranged. Either way, they must be stopped.

UP: Hmmm.

TN: Hmmm.

UP: You believe that anyone that believes [in gun control] is evil or deranged?

TN: Evil to the core or deranged. If you would force me to be unarmed and helpless I would have to do everything in my power to neutralize you... Peace and love will get you killed. That doesn't sound like a hippie. Good try, Martin. You've gotta tell me, I want the words, say "Uncle Ted is the best interview I've ever done." Say it.

UP: Uncle Ted is the best phone interview I've ever done.

TN: Well if I was there in person with my short shorts on then you'd say it.

Compare:
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(Sung by Obama to the theme song of “The Jeffersons”):

“Well we’re movin’ on up,
To Washington, D.C.
To a deee-luxe pimp pad,
Painted whiiiite.
Yeah we’re movin’ on up,
To the White House.
I’ll be jetting with P. Diddy cross the sky.

McCain can’t score on the east coast,
Palin was just a cute, cheap thrill.
Took a whole lot of campaign promises,
To take over Capitol Hill.
Now we’re livin’ in the White House
Chewin’ on the government fat.
As long as we here
It’s tax, tax, tax!
Ripping off the rich fat cats!

Well we’re movin’ on up
To the big time.
To a dee-luxe sweet crib
That’s just too fly.
Moooovin’ on up
To D.C.
I finally showed McCain I’m the guy!”

[Murfreesboro Post via Romenesko. Don't miss his section on Rutherford County's new state Rep. Dr. Rishi Saxena and his crazy Bangladeshi accent, either!]

Exhibit 1: The use of the word "Baby Daddy" by everyone from Drudge to Radar to Us Weekly to the Daily Intel. Everyone's using this phrase, because it's easy and snarky. It's not particularly original, though, and it's no longer funny if everyone else is saying it. Cut it out. (Also, I am aware that many persons of color sometimes use this phrase un-ironically, but you sound like an ass if you're white.)

Exhibit 2: Alaska, OMG! Even the highfalutin' Bill Maher couldn't help reaching for some easy laughs, jumping into the fray with, "when [Palin] got a phone call at three in the morning, it was because a moose had gotten into the garbage can." Funny! But also: "If [McCain dies] this stewardess can handle it." Snob!

Exhibit 3: Redneck Hillbilly White Trash Hicks
Levi Johnston, Bristol Palin's soon-to-be teen dad, called himself a redneck out of pride, so there's his excuse. Everyone else, however:

"Is Alaska a statutory rape jurisdiction? If so, wouldn't Levi "Redneck" Johnston fit the profile of a child rapist or molester? Just asking," wonders an innocent HuffPo commenter.

Also:

"what a VP this would make. How many of the rest of her kids will get pregnant or get someone else pregnant in the next 4 years? Welcome to rightwing Christian fundie land. This is the reality—my guess is those Bible-thumpers have more pregnant teen kids than those of us who wouldn't get a Bible near our kids," opines a Daily Kos commenter

(And there's the photoshop attached above, which has already been sent to our own inbox multiple times. Get it? She's a woman from a rural area who hunts. Will they rename it the White Trash House?)

And so the precious blue-state liberals reveal themselves to be the small-minded yokels suspicious of anything and everyone that's different.