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New York, 4:48 AM
Sun Nov 29
12 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #richardsimmons more →

    Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV

    Ongoing Richard Simmons Terror Campaign Leaves Dozens Wounded, Sweatin'

    Richard Simmons Psychotically Grateful For TV Time

    'Today' Set Held Hostage By Best Gams In The Business

    Couch Jumper Richard Simmons Stops Just Shy of Declaring Love for Katie Holmes

    BREAKING: Jennifer Aniston Submerges Self In Water, Possesses Nipples

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    Richard Simmons Falls Down! (Yup, That's The Whole Thing!)

    Richard Simmons Brings Whispered Affirmations, Sassy Pom Poms To 'Dancing With The Stars'
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    I like when he argues with David Letterman.
     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of DoctorEcks DoctorEcks
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    I checked out the link. It has the single craziest sentence I've ever read.


    ..... said Dr. Linda Norr, a specialist in elementary-school-related respiratory diseases. "Those sufferers who are not put on a rigorous program of treatment often spend their last days on respirators, hacking up a thick, dazzling mucus."


    A "dazzling mucus"?!? This Doc has the worst bedside manner of anyone I've ever read about. Sorry you lost your mother....but her mucus was just "dazzling". Are you sure Richard Simmons wasn't being quoted somehow?

     Reply
    DoctorEcks was starred DoctorEcks was unstarred
    Image of Bellyboop Bellyboop
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Awww...he's like an animated, loving chia pet. He seems like such a sweetie. But isn't he cold in those short shorts and tank top?
     Reply
    Bellyboop was starred Bellyboop was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    01/06/09

    @Bellyboop: I think the hair acts like one of those giant Russian fur hats.
     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    He's practically a lactating breast, but long live Richard Simmons. 80's weekday mornings wouldn't have been the same without him.


     Reply
    Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of homoviper homoviper
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    You stay crazy, Richard Simmons.
     Reply
    homoviper was starred homoviper was unstarred
    Image of rollergirl76 rollergirl76
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    His new workout DVD is coming out. It's called "Molestin' to the Oldies".
     Reply
    rollergirl76 was starred rollergirl76 was unstarred
    Image of Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Richard Simmons- the non-threatening threat


    or alternately


    Simmons Fruity-guest

     Reply
    Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate was starred Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate was unstarred
    Image of overunderover overunderover
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Richard Simmons is the Olean of the fitness world.
     Reply
    overunderover was starred overunderover was unstarred
    Image of Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) Oy Veh (Informality Reigns)
    01/06/09

    @overunderover: Or perhaps the Olestra of the fitnes world (may cause severe intestinal cramping)?
     Reply
    Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) was starred Oy Veh (Informality Reigns) was unstarred
    Image of contradicto contradicto
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Remember kids: It's not rape if you're gay.
     Reply
    contradicto was starred contradicto was unstarred
    Image of kabamli kabamli
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons Psychotically Grateful For TV Time
    If he can get Slyvester Stallone's and Dustin Hoffman's parents to work out together, the man is funny in my book.



    + Watch video
     Reply
    kabamli was starred kabamli was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    01/06/09

    @kabamli: This is all kinds of awesome. Thank you!
     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of Baroness Baroness
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Paraphrasing Blair Waldorf, "LEGS are NOT PANTS!"
     Reply
    Baroness was starred Baroness was unstarred
    Image of Rumpelstilskin Rumpelstilskin
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    He scares me more than Ann Coulter. Does he wear those shorty-shorts everywhere?
     Reply
    Rumpelstilskin was starred Rumpelstilskin was unstarred
    Image of everfade everfade
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    I hope he never stops.
     Reply
    everfade was starred everfade was unstarred
    Image of MidTwix MidTwix
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    Still love him. Short-shorts, crazy cloud hair, screaming... LOVE him.
     Reply
    MidTwix was starred MidTwix was unstarred
    Image of ginger rant ginger rant
    01/06/09

    @MidTwix: Agreed. I also love how there is ZERO PUBLIC SPECULATION about whether or not he's gay. Because ... I mean, COME ON.
     Reply
    ginger rant was starred ginger rant was unstarred
    Image of fileunder fileunder
    01/06/09

    @MidTwix: Same here - he's a good 20+ years older than me (at least!) and he just keeps going.

    I met him at a taping of Live! with Regis and Kathie Lee years ago.
     Reply
    fileunder was starred fileunder was unstarred
    Image of Aaron Altman Aaron Altman
    01/06/09

    In reply to Richard Simmons, the Serial Groper of Morning TV
    If you look carefully... HIS EYEBALL IS GONE.
     Reply
    Aaron Altman was starred Aaron Altman was unstarred
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