In the aftermath of Lady Gaga's meaty VMA performance, erotic revelations. Kanye West is a puddle of sorrow. Robert DeNiro cures boner problems with Tiger Balm. Andre Leon Talley falls off a bench. Monday gossip starts the week right.

Here's a trailer for Stone, a thriller starring Robert De Niro and Edward Norton, reunited some nine years after they thrilled in The Score. This looks like a slightly more sedate movie, with a lot of sitting and yelling.

Here's a trailer for Little Fockers, the threequel in the epic and groundbreaking Meet the Parents triology. We are in the future, Ben Stiller and his wife have kids, and Bob De Niro is still doing his comedy thing.

After an argument outside of LaGuardia, Robert De Niro's driver sprayed a paparazzo in the face with pepper spray. The actor was already past security when it happened. Let's hope this press aggression doesn't continue. Be careful out there, boys!

The blood of a thousand PR assistants runs through the streets after a frightful error leaves Wintour in the cold. Elin debates attending Tiger's press conference. Gabourey Sibide is so over Vanity Fair's all-white Young Hollywood issue. Thursday gossip ahoy!

Al Pacino steps into Robert De Niro's Italian leather shoes. Amanda Bynes' sex comedy. Judd Apatow forsakes the bromance for Kristen Wiig. Erector Sets' movie adaptation is not a soft-core porn. The Trade Roundup just ate an entire frittata.

A complicated back-story could lead to a Taxi Driver remake—starring Robert De Niro. The ACE awards happened. Barbara Walters won't torture us anymore before the Oscars. Today's Trade Roundup is dedicated to former president Martin Van Buren.

Martin Scorsese and Robert De Niro are teaming up with Lars von Trier to "reboot" Taxi Driver. In 3D! (Your totally credible source for this information: "Copenhagen film magazine Ekko.")

[Straight allies Robert De Niro and Bruce Springsteen show President Obama their support for gay rights at a reception for the Kennedy Center Honors recipients at the White House on December 5. Image freshly uploaded to the White House's Flickr]

Hotmess Courtney Love reports that hotmess Britney Spears was molested as a kid. Usher is a girlyman. Captain Scuzzybutt Esq. will make Page Six one day. Natalie Portman's "tits." Barbara Cocoran's PR team. Presenting your late-edition Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

In a time of chaos, the wise mogul keeps his enemies close, and his off-their-rocker trainwreck creations closer.

It's a season for endings and beginnings and new beginnings and final endings and a reboot or two. Today's trades make Hollywood look like one of its own over-handled franchises.

Nothing that excites Hollywood more than the thought of a studio changing hands; the implications spilling down over a generation of executives and deals might be completely incomprehensible from this distance, but they are darn exciting.

Now here's a Big Apple-based show we could love. Spike Lee and Robert De Niro are coming together to bring Showtime a new drama series about the nitty-gritty 80s-version of the once-fearsome Alphabet City. It's called Alphaville. [THR]

Robert De Niro turns 66 today. Sean Penn is turning 49. Controversial book publisher Judith Regan is 56. Yankees star Jorge Posada is turning 38. J. Crew CEO Mickey Drexler and Oracle CEO Larry Ellison are both turning 65 today. John McDonald, the restaurateur behind Lure Fishbar, Chinatown Brasserie, and the…

The Sun claims that Brad and Angelina are on the rocks and they're just pretending to love each other, Ed Westwick and Jessica Szhor partied together last night, a Gossip Girl spinoff is definitely in the works, and Patrick Swayze poses for a photo so everyone knows he's still alive.

• Presumably this is what happens when you spend time hanging out with John Mayer: Dick Parsons (right), the former chairman and CEO of Time Warner and currently the chairman of the board of Citigroup, not only cheated on his wife of three decades with a "model-philanthropist" 29 years his junior, he fathered a…