Get ready for some truly horrible jokes from our nation's least funny people, political pundits: Former White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs may be joining Facebook in "a senior role in helping to manage the company's communications."
Outgoing White House spokesman Robert Gibbs started his press briefing after hours of delay this afternoon, and man, did he look terrified! Probably because there's a semi-revolution in a crucial American client state, currently. Will American turn on Egypt's president?
Barack Obama's new press secretary will be Jay Carney, who's been serving as Joe Biden's communications director. Before that he was a Time reporter, so steel yourself for endless "lamestream liberal media" screams from Sarah Palin and whatnot.
Robert Gibbs, the nation's highest-paid kindergarten teacher, will resign in February, the New York Times reports. He says he'll continue to advise Obama and intends to get working on his 2012 re-election campaign.
Poor President Obama! All of his besties are leaving the White House. Advisor David Axelrod and Press Secretary Robert Gibbs are likely leaving soon, Gibbs as early as Friday, at which point Obama may announce a new Chief of Staff.
White House press secretary Robert Gibbs threatened to call off negotiations with Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh today after three U.S. reporters were barred from covering the meeting. "Angry words" were shared, but Indian officials finally relented. Image via AP.
President Obama's upcoming trip to India won't cost $200 million a day, and "34 warships" aren't accompanying him to the subcontinent. But it doesn't matter! It's already the hot new right-wing anti-Obama rumor.
White House press secretary was so nasty to whiny liberals — sorry, the "professional left" — in an interview published this morning, getting everyone all worked up. Now he's in the apology stage, calling his comments "inartful" and counterproductive.
Nothing's more fun for the White House than a public whipping of whiny-baby liberal hippie bitches. Today, it's press secretary Robert Gibbs' turn! In an interview with The Hill, he complains about the "professional left," who whine about everything.
The Administration has begun its grueling cleanup process after the hasty firing of USDA official Shirley Sherrod, following Andrew Breitbart's latest idiot nonsense. At today's White House press conference, press secretary Robert Gibbs apologized on behalf of the administration.
CNN, the network that brought us the hologram interview, once again innovated news today. Shirley Sherrod, the woman wrongly accused of discriminatory behavior and fired by the USDA, was brought in to watch Robert Gibbs's press conference on the topic.
Oh god, Democrats are infighting again. Nancy Pelosi hates White House secretary Robert Gibbs! Most other House Democrats hate Robert Gibbs! Robert Gibbs probably hates someone too! Time to get these kids in a room and "clear the air."
Many Democrats are upset with White House press secretary Robert Gibbs for saying, over the weekend, that enough House seats are in play this November for a Republican takeover. Hey, upset Democrats: This was not news to anyone.
Will Barack Obama fire Stanley McChrystal after the general talked shit about everyone to Rolling Stone? Press secretary Robert Gibbs was pretty mum about this in today's briefing! Obama is "angry," though. Isn't that all people really want to hear?
During yesterday's televised White House briefing on newly passed heath care legislation, Press Secretary Robert Gibbs compared an unhappy John McCain to his 6-year-old son Ethan when his toys are taken away. Shots fired.
Recently Presidential Special Advisor David Axelrod has been painted as a beleaguered figure, upset at the world he sees around him. Today he told the Republicans to "make my day" and the Israelis a new policy announcement was an "insult."
Today was ABC White House correspondent Jake Tapper's birthday! He got a Dora the Explorer cake. And then he made mean jokes about Robert Gibbs, who was just trying to have some fun.
This is how the transcript of today's White House press briefing begins. Can anyone explain who Bill is? And also what the hell was going on in the Brady Briefing Room today? Real journalists doing real journalism.
