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Michael Bay Made Robot Balls

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DorothyBarker
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
Seeing the noisy, empty, fracas that is the Transformers 2 commercial I actually had this moment of feeling sorry for Michael Bay and his sorry, shallow, shitty career. And I am UNEMPLOYED.
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knacko
06/18/09

@DorothyBarker: I'd gladly take a shallow, shitty career when I'm making $80 million per picture.

[www.movieline.com]
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Krashstar
06/19/09

@knacko: Yeah, shallow and shitty in that "I own my own fucking tiger and I feed it raw money" way is way better that shallow and shitty feeling that comes with a barista job at Starbucks.
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Perhaps Not
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
See how sexist these movies are? Decepticles, but no Autobagina.
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Perhaps Not
06/17/09

@Perhaps Not: ...and Contradicto totally got there first. I lose.
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KarenaRucker
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
The balls are there for a quick quip from John Turturro (who gets the film's few good one-liners). The whole thing plays like a nagging two-and-a-half-hour trailer for a decent one-and-a-half-hour movie. Just like Bad Boys II. The $700m take of the 2007 outing still kachinging in Paramount's ears, they let Bay loose here, and he promptly suffocates what little charm that first outing possessed with as much CGI crash, bang, wallop as Industrial Light & Magic can muster. If you gave a 12-year old boy six espressos and told him to cram all his fantasies - giant killer robots, shagging dogs, hot triplets on motorbikes, bumbling parents, fast cars, slapstick sidekicks, metallic hi-tech hardware, Megan Fox with her ass in the air - this is the shiny ball of confusion he'd spew out.
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skahammer
06/18/09

@KarenaRucker: Um, did you say something about Megan Fox?
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Wrapitup
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
Fuck this asshole. He hit his peak with The Rock way back in 1996. Just like his mentor Jerry Bruckheimer, he's lost his way into jump-cut and shitty lighting hell. The first Transformers sucked. It was like the first time you get drunk. You think your head will explode from all the awesomeness, but then you just feel disoriented and headachy, and everyone around you sounds dumb, and you want a nap. All this Pyramid vs Testicle shit sounds great. But Michael Bay will find a way to make it stupid and embarrassing.
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contradicto
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
Isn't the correct term "decepticles?"
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johnny_carsick
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
gawdy, over-the-top and puerile. how unlike michael.
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johnny_carsick
06/17/09

@johnny_carsick: gaudy. urk.
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Richard Lawson
06/17/09

@johnny_carsick: Oh, he's gawdy too.

As in, "Oh my gawwwd was that movie bad."
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johnny_carsick
06/17/09

@Richard Lawson: the success of michael bay tests my faith in Gawd.
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TedSez
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
Is that a pyramid in your pants, or are you just glad to see Megan Fox?
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Kid Twist
06/17/09

In reply to Michael Bay Made Robot Balls
Balls of steel.
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T.S._delegate
06/17/09

@Kid Twist: Balls to the (soon to be demolished) wall.
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