Now that she's free from the bonds of her Nickelodeon overlords, Sam and Cat star and subject of furious fapping Jennette McCurdy can finally say what she's wanted to say since her (actually pretty tame) sexy lingerie selfies leaked earlier this year: "I am not a role model."
Brazilians do not just hate the World Cup theme song; with the world's biggest sporting spectacle just weeks away, it's becoming clear that Brazilians hate the whole fucking World Cup. Why can't we all be like Brazilians?
Want to know what's wrong with kids these days? Good. I'll tell you. In my day, we had a concept known as "selling out." These days, there is new concept, called "selling out." Kids love it!
Graduation season always brings with it entertaining tales of lazy, desperate, or just plain dumb graduation speakers, who chose to plagiarize their speeches. Already this year we've had a medical school dean ripping off Atul Gawande, and a law school graduate pleading ignorance about the fact that plagiarism is…
This delightful nugget about an early Sarah Palin encounter with her possible presidential rival's ex-wife comes from the April 3, 1993 edition of the Anchorage Daily News:
A poll on TVGuide.com is asking the public to vote on the best teen role model on TV. Bristol Palin only has 4% of the vote just behind that hussy Miley Cyrus. iCarly's Miranda Cosgrove leads by a wide margin.
Huh, says here that fitness superstar Perez Hilton is starting a new site about fitness, "FitPerez" dotcom. (Perez has "four trainers," after all). We've scored this exclusive pic of the new site's content, below.
Lt. Col. Vincent Nyakarundi, a veteran of African peacekeeping missions, is Rwanda's first-ever military attache to the UN. He doesn't need to come all that way to get mugged. Could you face crime with the equanimity of Vincent Nyakarundi?
Jay-Z is a pretty good rapper. Jay-Z is not the best rapper ever. Jay-Z is not a role model. Jay-Z is not a hip hop hero. Not even for you, cool kids. Get off Jay-Z's dick.
With cable TV rerunning our favorite movies at a vicious rate, it is hard to determine whether or not one should give up two hours to the cable gods. Finally, we have a handy formula to help us decide.
What did New York's A-list socialite Tinsley Mortimer do with her very glamorous weekend? She hosted Serena Bancroft's birthday party. Who is this Serena Bancroft? She's the towns hottest up-and-coming tween socialite. Everything about this is just insane.
Another month, another glossy fashion magazine spread for Marissa Mayer, this time in Glamour. We get it, already: the Google veep is a computer scientist in Oscar de la Renta; a nerd invited to prom. Why embellish her achievements?
Self magazine editor Lucy Danziger should be awarded some sort of prize—the Nobel people should establish a new category, if necessary—because she chooses to ride a bicycle to work.
In case there was any doubt he's a walking angel among us, Chesley Sullenberger has done penance for being overdue on a library book stuck in that plane he safely landed on the Hudson River.
"Dear Mr. Charney," begins the most misguided letter ever from a third grader to someone she looks up to. What are they teaching in the schools now, porno sex for the kids?
Is hero pilot Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger a normal man, or a superhuman paragon of ethics sent to earth to shame us into being better people? His treatment of an overdue library book points to "superhuman":
