If sparkly vampires shit in the woods, would you listen? Did Michael Jackson drink Pepsi? Is Amy Winehouse on drugs again? Does being Ashley Durpre get you invited to parties? Is Jay-Z still gangster? Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Tila Tequila's crazy domestic abuse squabble: drank and puked out by the D.A., while Anna Wintour gets stalked by teenage crazies. Mischa Barton channels Marissa Cooper. Mayor Bloomberg might know about Lady Gaga's peener. Presenting: your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup.

Twitter, the 140-characters at a time blogging service, was shaped by its founder's dry, understated sense of humor. The company, not to mention the service, seems to be a sort of Silicon Valley inside joke that, improbably, Ev Williams and his fellow Twitterers have managed to play on the rest of the world. For…

Yelp, the local-reviews site, is as infamous in San Francisco as it is nonfamous anywhere else in the country. Its parties, always hedonistic rampages of drunken conversations, burlesque troops, and makeout sessions in the photobooth, helped establish its local reputation and cement the loyalty of hardcore users. (…

Thanks to commenter yarbles, we were alerted to evidence of two more members of the PayPal Mafia posing, like YouTube founder Jawed Karim, in mafioso costumes. Pictured, above, Yelp cofounders Russell Simmons and Jeremy Stoppelman. (Stoppelman's the one with the fake mustache. At least, we hope it's fake.) Any more…

Note to big boss guys: If you're going to hook up with underlings at the company Christmas party, try to avoid leaving photographic evidence.

That goes for you Russel "It's-Better-With-Butter" Simmons, Yelp's co-founder, chief technology officer, and hottie in charge.