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sad things

videuhoh

An Andy Dick Meltdown Medley

In light of Andy Dick's recent unfortunate legal news, we thought we'd take a further look into the mind of the troubled comedian, then watch him get dragged off of a live television show after groping heiress/sorta business lady Ivanka Trump. In the first clip, Dick is talking about comedian Michael Richards' racially-charged on-stage freakout, delving into the thorny and busy psyche of a clown. In the second clip, well, he gets dragged off of the Jimmy Kimmel show after groping Ivanka Trump. Watch, sigh wearily, and, just maybe, learn a little something.

5wpr

Sad Flacks Secretly Edit Their Boss's Own Wikipedia Page

An IP address affiliated with America's most inept agency, 5WPR, was used to edit the Wikipedia entry about 5W's CEO, incompetent superflack and bad apologizer Ronn [sic] Torossian. This is the same IP address that the agency was using to leave fake blog comments, which it was busted for last week. Hey 5W, you guys think you could stop doing this stuff? It's really depressing to cover you. After the jump, a look at the major edit of Ronn's page, which is now flagged for sounding "like a news release.": More »

photography

"The empire struck back and laid me off"

A couple months ago we brought you the elegiac newsroom photography of Martin Gee, a designer at the San Jose Mercury News who picked up a camera one day and documented the ghostly quality atmosphere inside a newspaper dessicated by layoffs. Well, guess what: Gee has now been laid off! With no warning. While he was on vacation. Sucks. He's pissed, but he never put down his camera. After the jump, three photos that express his feelings towards his old employer: More »

fallen idols

From 'Greatest Of All Time' To 'Craigslist Cash-Waver'

Pictured: Kanye West posing next to once-dignified boxing hero Muhammad Ali, who is wearing Kanye's shutter shades. We know this is Kanye's favorite pastime, but it should really be reserved for less noble fashion victims. Now we have to go cry. (Click to enlarge). [Consequence via Byron Crawford]

sad things

Defeated Britney Spears Tells Us Where She'd Like to Be Buried

Poor, deep-fried, wistful tiny car driver (and, I suppose, musician) Britney Spears has chosen her burial plot. It's located in the bittersweetly named Hollywood Forever Cemetery. After hearing about Marilyn Monroe picking her own grave site, the singer wanted to follow suit and "when Britney saw Rudolph Valentino's grave at the cemetery she shrieked and said she wanted one." Though, she doesn't plan on going there anytime soon. "I'm going to live so I want to be brought to the Forever Cemetery when I'm 101," she said, with devastating optimism, to a pal. We like to imagine that the service, before she is entombed in Hollywood Forever, will consist of mournful piano renditions of her hit songs like "I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman" and "Lucky," while her two sons, wearing sailor costumes, slowly waltz. More »

crime

Tatum O'Neal: Surprisingly Bad At Buying Drugs

Tatum O'Neal, the child actress who won an Oscar at age 10 and then got heavily into drugs, booze, and self-destruction, was arrested last night for trying to buy coke not far from her Lower East Side apartment. Her situation is sad—she's struggled with serious addiction for a long time, but has reportedly been clean for two years. The second thing to be said, though, is: A veteran wealthy druggie was "spotted handing money to a street dealer," seriously? That method is far too gauche for the sophisticated cokehead. More »

open caption

On the Set of Neil Gaiman's Santa Claus

[Ruined singer Amy Winehouse at her London home yesterday; image via INF]

Bad Karma Oh dear. Poor Boy George. Once a sex, drugs, and music queen of the '80's, the singer has been reduced to peddling t-shirts at a London street fair, looking glum. OK, to be fair, the 46-year-old is selling his own line of clothing, called B-Rude, but it's still a bit depressing. Perhaps this marks the nadir of a long downward spiral that included such memorable milestones as his failed musical Taboo, his New York City trash clean up, and his arrest for allegedly kidnapping a male escort. I don't really want to hurt you Mr. George, but yikes.

public relations

CEO Ready To Sponsor Event Where Nothing Dies

You like to play with the pretty horses? Step away, until you pony up some cash, ha. High profile horse racing has become an entirely corporate marketing-driven spectacle, where horses are sponsored by UPS and owned by hedge funds. The big sponsor of the Kentucky Derby is YUM Brands, owner of Taco Bell and KFC. Who could embody the noble spirit of galloping stallions better than the nation's leading purveyor of Mexican Pizzas? Anyhow, YUM's CEO, David Novak, found out the perils of sponsoring an event with live animals when a horse up and died on the track at the Derby last weekend. With no idea what was happening, Novak stepped up moments later and gave his little speech plugging his company, which has proven to the world that he hates dead ponies: More »

the hills

No One Likes Anyone Anymore

Last night on not so crazy exciting television, The Hills mumbled on toward next week's finale. The penultimate episode of the MTV "reality" soap was about home and the pulling apart of things; relationships, friendships, and familial bonds were all torn slightly asunder as the sun continued to slowly broil our friends to a (hopefully) inevitable crisp. Heidi accepted new responsibilities at her fake PR/events job, which would take her to Las Vegas a lot (on a fancy private jet, no less) and away from sour old Spencer. The be-sweatpanted layabout further bitched at his sister, who kindly requested that he stop sleeping on her couch. Understanding that the cameras follow the women on this show, he returned to Heidi's condo, hoping for continued air time, only to find it empty. He sat there lonely and, I'm sure, hungry. But bluer still was poor Audrina. More »

the gays

Today In Sad Gays: Blogs and Ballads

It's Wednesday, and the gays are sad. As we stare out the window, pink rain spattering on the glass, and sip our tea with Valium crushed all up in it, we would like you all to know about it. Specifically, suspected (and, um, proven) geigh and American Idol runner-up Clay Aiken would like to sing about furtively masturbating to pictures of Chad Michael Murray while locked in a closet, and some sorta geigh (he dated Lance "On The Line" Bass) named Reichen Lehmkuhl (evidently that's a name) wants to teach us an important lesson. Clay was on QVC recently promoting a new album or haircut or line of products for lonely people. He sang his new song, subtly called "The Real Me," which includes lyrics like "Do I let it show, does anybody know?" (yes, dear) and "Living a charade, always on parade" (charades imply guessing, love). So yeah. That dude is blue. Reichen was apparently dumped by someone who was just into him for his massive, massive fame. He wrote a blog entry on his MySpace account saying things like "Never believe them when they say they're only going to sleep with you, especially when there is a social climbing opportunity in front of them." Oh how terrible. That must be a constant cross to bear for someone who was on Big Brother Amazing Race once. After the jump, find a video of Clay singing the sad gay bastard song, and get the full Reichen blog entry. More »

photography

Picturing The Death Of A Newspaper

Martin Gee is a designer at the San Jose Mercury News, which, like every other paper, has been gutted by budget cuts, layoffs, and buyouts recently. One night on a whim he took a camera and shot a series of photos inside the almost abandoned newsroom. They do an amazing job of capturing the junkyard aura of the place [PDN via Animal]. It's newsroom-as-battlefield, the day after. You can see his full set of photos here. Below, our five favorite shots. More »

gayme shows

Pack Up the Gilmore Girls, Nancy. We're Goin' On TV

As the entertainment industry continues to poke at gays with sticks, trying to see what makes them work, I guess it was inevitable that a Will & Grace-themed game show would emerge. AfterElton recently spotted a Craigslist ad for a "major cable network" game show that will feature lovable duos of self-loathing gay men and the let-down-by-life-one-too-many-times women who befriend them. It has something to do with trivia or some such nonsense. The really gross and unfortunate casting call lies (intimately, yet platonically) after the jump. More »

reality checks

Life Is Not a Fairytale

Sure, it may seem like a good time, but the laissez faire minor-celebrity party scene doesn't always do wonders for one's psyche. Take the sad (but maybe hopeful!) story of Marc Jacobs' former paramour Erik Rhodes. The successful and eager porn star was recently all over the place; enjoying Fashion Week and fancy celebrity-packed dinners, dating a famous designer, etc. He seemed a little dim, yes, but that only made him a more enjoyable character in the Jacobs saga. Dopey guy makes big (for a moment). And yet just a few short months later, Rhodes seems to be having something of a meltdown. More »

sad things

We've Had The Time Of Our Lives

It was sad news indeed to find out that actor Patrick Swayze, suffering from pancreatic cancer, has been given a grim prognosis. Though faded from the limelight for a time, he's remained a mostly beloved actor, as liked for his rough-and-tumble fighting in Road House as his dancin' and romancin' in Dirty Dancing. A supremely talented physical performer, at the height of his career Swayze perfectly embodied, and perhaps helped create, a certain type of sensitive, maybe even thoughtful, machismo that could be seen as a direct precursor to today's better rounded, more casually masculine movie stars (Matthew McConaughey owes him a debt of gratitude.) He's had a lasting effect on cinema, and that's about as much as any actor can hope for. However he's done it, he's brought people joy. And for that, we're grateful. Clips of some of his notable work after the jump. Update: Reps for the actor say his status is better than some are reporting. More »

sad things

Woman Not Actually Raised By Wolves, Did In Fact Have A Hard Life

Oh dear. The book Misha: A Memoire of the Holocaust Years by Misha Defonesca, about her time as a little girl escaping from the Nazis and living with wild animals, was very popular. It was translated into 18 languages and was made into a French feature film. The only problem with this embiggening, lupine story? It's not real. It seems that Defonseca did not, in fact, escape the Warsaw ghetto, kill a Nazi, and befriend a pack of wolves during the war. "I ask forgiveness to all who felt betrayed. I beg you to put yourself in my place, of a 4-year-old girl who was very lost," Defonseca, whose real name is Monique De Wael (and is not actually Jewish), said in a recent statement. Though, to be fair, her parents were killed by the SS, just not the way it happens in the book. Sigh. Just don't tell me Life Is Beautiful wasn't real. What wacky places those concentration camps were! [CNN]

gawker stalker

The Lonely Ballad of Timothy Gunn

If his behavior at gay bars is any indication, Tim Gunn has a sad. A tipster writes that the white haired, perfectly groomed Project Runway mentor was spotted at The Townhouse last night, alone and upset. More »

reality tv

It Was Producers Killed the Beauty (and the Geek)

A reality show I actually like, Beauty and the Geek, is disappointing me in two ways right now. First, the season features a Geek contestant named Greg who is a "Clothing Designer/Pastry Chef" and "Self-Proclaimed 'Gaysian'". This rankles not because the guy is gay (or Asian) but because a fashion designing pastry chef who calls himself a gaysian isn't exactly the kind of pasty, Brillo-haired, clodhopper-wearing Geek that we've come to expect from the show. Hopefully it's all just marketing spin and Greg will walk onto the first episode wearing a cape and speaking Ferengi. The other, more alarming, news about the new season is the rumor that, for the first time in the show's history, beauties and geeks will compete against each other, rather than with one another. But then how are they supposed to learn and grow and change and become bestest, strangest friends and possibly more?? Sigh. [AfterElton] After the jump, an interview with Dave, one half of my favorite couple from last season. (He discusses LARPing briefly!) More »