According to Lynn, Lutfi once kept Britney "quiet for three days" by lacing her food with ground sleeping pills. He also, says Lynn, controlled Brit by convincing her that only he could help her win back custody of her kids.

"Take the pills. You should do what I tell you to see your babies," Lynn says Lutfi warned Britney.

"She was sad, floundering, ripe for a predator to come along. Britney was open to this man who rode in on a white horse.

"Within a month of meeting, Sam was in complete control of [Britney's] life. He appointed himself as her gatekeeper, and there was no one he wanted to keep the gate closed to more than Britney's family," Lynne writes.

The elder Spears also accuses Lutfi of disabling Britney's cars (which was probably for the best), hiding her cell phones and chargers, and, bizarrely, hiding her pet dog London from her and then producing the animal and claiming to have found it himself.

A judge eventually issued a restraining order against Lutfi and Britney's dad Jamie now oversees her affairs. [NYP]

• Amy Winehouse may have lasted up to nine days clean of drugs before she called herself a "zombie," burned herself and did "cocaine, ecstasy, cannabis and booze." Of course the sensationalist Sun spins it negative and says she's "back in drug hell," typical. (Check out the sidebar from their "Bizarre Editor.") [Sun]
• The Olsen twins have a deal for a book, but it's the kind of book you pose for, and then people with a sense of irony buy it for their coffee table. It is decidedly not the kind of book where you have to type the hard words. [AP]
• Britney Spears made outrageous demands at an LA clothing boutique, but then the only thing she would buy was "the yellow wig on a mannequin in the window... the manager eventually agreed to offer it to her for $100." This is, of course, one of the most awesome things Spears has done for, oh, maybe six months. [Gatecrasher]
• TMZ tried to tell the world the LA police were investigating Sam Lutfi for drugging Britney Spears, but every media outlet ever said they were wrong and printed an LAPD statement to that effect. Well guess who now has a piece of paper saying the LA police really are looking at the Lutfi drugging charge?
• Jon Eardley wants control of Britney's money and life, but he can't even convince a judge he's even her attorney in the first place. He vows to keep fighting this "oppressive and unjust" situation. [Reuters]
• Orlando Bloom doesn't bathe. Also he doesn't wash his clothes, but maybe he just has those French jeans you're not supposed to wash, ever.
• Ashlee Simpson and her boyfriend made up a story about being pregnant to somehow stop internet music piracy, and you and I are the dumb ones for not getting the joke. [TMZ]
• Angelina Jolie should start selling subscriptions just to her St. John ads because apparently everyone finds them very pretty and is posting them to their blogs. [Faded Youth]

Anyone with a phone and a computer can hang out a public relations shingle these days. In fact, with today's bloggers and party planners fancying themselves as high-powered PR gurus, just about anyone has. That's why Media Image Consultant MICHAEL SANDS stands out, and away, from this self-absorbed, self-important crowd...

MICHAEL SANDS has been instrumental in helping the Public Relations industry of the '80s transform into Media Consulting in the '90s and evolve into the wide range of competencies that constitute today's Media Image Consulting profession. In fact, he coined the phrase...

For many years, Michael said "Cheese" to the clicks of Nikons...

Michael was photographed for: GQ, ESQUIRE, BRIDE'S, L'UOMO VOGUE, PARADE, TIME, the NEW YORK MAGAZINE, NY TIMES SUNDAY MAGAZINE, and even a few JC Penney catalogues...

Michael knew when it was time to stop saying "Cheese" and start saying "Cheesecake," as in C'est Cheesecake, his successful LA-based gourmet cheesecake business...

Designed and implemented Los Angeles Police Chief Daryl Gates' campaign and slogan "Gates Must Stay", increasing public awareness during the Rodney King incident.

• Britney Spears hanger-on Sam Lutfi must henceforth keep 250 yards from the singer because as Britney's mom reminded us, he "gave Britney Spears pills ground up in her food to keep her quiet and at one point he told Britney she had to take 10 pills a day if she wanted to see her two young children." [Reuters]
• Lutfi's lawyer tried to say he wasn't properly served with the restraining order paperwork. The judge basically laughed. Lutfi's legal team then asked if the judge would like maybe a home-made scone or some coffee or maybe an "aspirin."
• Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes will supposedly come to Prince's hot Oscar party, along with Penelope Cruz. When the catfighting and Scientology recruiting speeches begin, scoot on over to the real LA Oscar party, hosted by queen diva Elton John.
• Ryan Phillippe endorsed Obama, and has the cool Shepard Fairey t-shirt to prove it. Against all odds, the left-of-Hillary, cool and charismatic black Democratic candidate is dominating among gorgeous celebrities. [X17]
• Brangelina were confused, until they realized Clint Eastwood and his wife were waiting for them at the uncool restaurant across the street. Then everyone not pregnant ordered wine and got drunk and happy. Lesson: Clint Eastwood likes to drink. Oh, and you'll usually have a better time at the uncool restaurant! [Showbiz Spy]
• Teen star Miley Cyrus apologized for not wearing her seatbelt in a movie or raising your children for you or transforming you into a responsible human being who has better things to do than yell at a teen star over some stupid shit. [AP]
• Riverbank Hotel staff "baffled" that Amy Winehouse trashed her room over two weeks, leaving "the floor strewn in champagne bottles and unwashed knickers." Maybe if she had checked in under the assumed name "I Live To Trash Hotel Rooms" they might have seen this coming. Probably not, though. [Showbiz Spy]
• Eminem to finally let the world in on his family dramas and emotional issues, in a book. [People]
• Moby thinks people hate him because Natalie Portman was his girlfriend this one time. Oh, Moby. [P6]

Michael Sands, Sam Lutfi's spokesman, exclusively tells us that "Internet tabloid gossip Web sites need to stop reporting bogus stories without knowing the truth. They need to stop brainwashing the public."

..... Reported PageSix.com.

Bonus hilarious quote:

Follow-up calls to the LAPD Media Relations department were answered by Officer Lee, who said, "Who would you believe? The LAPD or Internet reports?"

• To unveil her new video, "Break The Ice," Britney Spears will appear on Total Request Live, and has been practicing for everything at her favorite dance studio. Hopefully that includes the dance-and-boob-flash synchronization she carefully rehearsed in January, because there's nothing more embarrassing than an out-of-rhythm wardrobe malfunction. [Showbiz Spy]
• TMZ reported police were investigating Spears codependent Sam Lutfi for drugging the singer, but they are apparently very secret police, because every media outlet in the world that called the LAPD was told the story was bogus.
• George Clooney blew $40,000 on his 28-year-old cocktail waitress girlfriend for Valentine's Day, which was so romantic some crazy stalker made his portrait out of jelly beans. [Showbiz Spy]
• Frail wimpy Angelina Jolie fainted on an airplane just because she's pregnant with twins and it's an 18-hour flight out from Iraq to Los Angeles. [Sun]
• Brits complain about drunkenness and profanity on one of their music awards shows. Yes, limeys, that's called Rock N Roll, you kind of helped invent it, remember? [Daily Mail]
• Minnie Driver would like to hide her pregnancy forever, but she had to go shopping at some point! [P6]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are talking about making their own awful reality show, because there just aren't enough outlets for their ample talents. [P6]

Q: Why did Sam give her prescription medications when he is not a doctor? Sands: "Sam had been giving prescription medication smashed up to Spears via a psycho-pharmacologist. It was a cocktail of sorts. It was pills that she had to take and he took care of her."

Q: Who was Sam to Britney?
Sands: "Sam was Spears manager. if you look at the movie "Frances," Britney is the 21st century version of Frances Farmer. Spears has mental illness called 'bipolar disorder,' I know this because my ex-wife suffered from it."

[JJ's Dirt]