schools - Gawker

posts about #schools more →
College Rankings Totally Made Up
School's Out Forever
Swine Flu Panic Paralyzes Horace Mann
Oprah Winfrey Directly Responsible for South African Teen Lesbianism
Graydon Carter's Golden High School a No Go!
Andrea Peyser Occasionally Hates Something Correctly
Celebrity-Backed Mediacentric High to Add New Dimension to Private School Snobbery
Palo Alto shuts out global competition

Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

Dsmvwl Admin Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×

yojeezy
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Wow, those guys really must like cock.
Reply

Trulymadlyme promoted this comment yojeezy was starred yojeezy was unstarred

Botswana Meat Commission FC
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Someone needs to hurry up and rescue that small black child before a white woman three counties over gets raped.
Reply

tigolbitties
08/07/09

@Botswana Meat Commission FC: ha! (as in ridiculous ha, not funny ha - rape is never funny) ooooh south carolina...
Reply

Edited by tigolbitties at 08/07/09 4:32 PM tigolbitties was starred tigolbitties was unstarred

No Day Like Friday
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Where did you go, HamNo?
Reply

Botswana Meat Commission FC promoted this comment No Day Like Friday was starred

Botswana Meat Commission FC
08/07/09

@No Day Like Friday:
I'm pretty sure he started out at the Fashion Institute of Design before transferring to Wasilla Technical College for its outstanding fisheries program.
Reply

Spirit Fingers
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Sheesh. I thought the Merchant Marine was something that existed in the 1940's. You know, when someone said all Bogey-like, "I'm going off to join the Merchant Marine, schee. And I won't be here to love you anymore, Darla." He grabs a fedora off the coat rack. Looks at Darla with a smirk, then walks out the door in a huff. Cue organ-based, high drama end-scene music. No?
Then am I to assume it has something to do with the red cocks at the forefront of the picture, because really that could just be a Tuesday in Boston.
Reply

Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred

Lucky
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Princeton Review's ratings are obviously bullshit. UCSB only made #10 on their party schools list. I refuse to believe we were beaten by any school in Wisconsin.
Reply

SaraRueful promoted this comment Lucky was starred Lucky was unstarred

SaraRueful
08/07/09

@Lucky: You ever been to Wisconsin? Three bars (minimum) on every block, and half the cities have breweries. They know what they're doing up there.
Reply

SaraRueful was starred SaraRueful was unstarred

Lucky
08/07/09

@SaraRueful: Have you ever been to Isla Vista on a Saturday night? :-)
If you haven't, I don't even know how to describe it in a way that does it justice. But just to give you an idea, energy and alcoholic drink companies sponsor parties. Add to that the already formidable purchasing power of the well-off white kids who make up the frats and sororities – it's amazing.
Reply

Lucky was starred Lucky was unstarred

Botswana Meat Commission FC
08/07/09

@Lucky: Wisconsin is basically just a state full of drunk people. Seriously. They're easily tops in per capita alcohol consumption every year.
Reply

Lucky
08/07/09

@Botswana Meat Commission FC: I don't know what the per capita alcohol consumption for IV is, but I'd bet money we could give Wisconsin more than decent competition at the very least. But maybe I was too quick to dismiss Wisconsin.
Reply

Lucky was starred Lucky was unstarred

Lucky
08/07/09

@SaraRueful, @Botswana Meat Commission FC: BTW, hearting both of you for contributing to my education.
Reply

Lucky was starred Lucky was unstarred

Lucky
08/07/09

@SaraRueful: I also forgot about Floatopia.
I think Floatopia alone should guarantee a higher spot than #10.
Reply

Lucky was starred Lucky was unstarred

RonMwangaguhunga
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
These things are so scammy. I prefer lists which have journalists covering the education beat over years that have actually visited some of these schools than some dubious metrics put together by a magazine editorial committee.
Reply

RonMwangaguhunga was starred RonMwangaguhunga was unstarred

Lymed
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
If Rory followed her dream and went to Harvard instead of Yale I bet she would have gotten that NYT scholarship. What was she thinking going to a school with the 3rd best newspaper?
Reply

Lymed was starred Lymed was unstarred

DahlELama
08/07/09

@Lymed: More importantly, North Carolina? Really? Who knew?
Reply

DahlELama was starred DahlELama was unstarred

RussianTaco
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
The US military colleges regularly beat ivy league schools when ranked side by side. West Point, for instance, compared to Harvard, is harder to get into (they have a more stringent admission policy than Harvard's), offers a better quality education, and costs you 100 percent less (actually, if you go to West Point, they pay you, versus you paying them). Put a Harvard fourth year student next to a West Point fourth year student and you'll see a huge difference. Most likely, the West Point student will be smarter, in better shape, have better moral character, more developed leadership skills, and could kick the Harvard kid's ass. Provided when you graduate Harvard you don't have to commit to four years in the Army as an officer, but still, in most respects, the military colleges are the best schools in the country.
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd promoted this comment RussianTaco was starred RussianTaco was unstarred

Paul.B.Dodd
08/07/09

@RussianTaco: "four years in the Army as an officer"
There's always a caveat isn't there?
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd was starred Paul.B.Dodd was unstarred

SaraRueful
08/07/09

@RussianTaco: McCain: West Point; Obama: Harvard. Sorry, I win.
Reply

SaraRueful was starred SaraRueful was unstarred

Paul.B.Dodd
08/07/09

@SaraRueful: McCain didn't go to West Point. I don't think he had the chops academically to get in. He attended The Naval Academy and probably got in on a legacy pass because his father and grandfather were 4-star admirals in the Navy.
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd was starred Paul.B.Dodd was unstarred

tigolbitties
08/07/09

@RussianTaco: can you define better quality education please? especially compared to the ivys... thanx
Reply

tigolbitties was starred tigolbitties was unstarred

SaraRueful
08/07/09

@Paul.B.Dodd: Fuck my lazy and cursory Google search that said he did. Maybe I could be Alessandra Stanley's fact-checker.
Reply

SaraRueful was starred SaraRueful was unstarred

RussianTaco
08/07/09

@tigolbitties: Well, i would define a "better quality education" as one that more definitively prepares you to overcome the obstacles you'll encounter in the real world. I don't have statistical information that cross analyzes the curriculums of the ivys vs. the military academies, which is maybe what you're hoping for. But what I can say is that the military colleges either meet or beat the the ivys when it comes to class size, quality of faculty, course intensity, resources available to the students, and students' performance expectations. If you were to consider all those being equal, I think the tipping factor in showing that the military colleges offer a better education is the leadership training, which isn't a required course at any ivy (i'm assuming, is it?). Learning how to think quickly and make life or death decisions under heavy stress is required of all West Point grads. I think it would be hard to argue that that kind of preparation for real world circumstances (even if those circumstances were navigating the corporate world and not the battle field) are more effectively taught anywhere other than a military college.
On a side note, I just ran across this on West Point's Web site: "West Point and Princeton University are the only academic institutions in the nation that rank in the top four in both Rhodes and Hertz Scholarships awarded for excellence in undergraduate study."
Reply

Edited by RussianTaco at 08/07/09 6:02 PM RussianTaco was starred RussianTaco was unstarred

RussianTaco
08/07/09

@Paul.B.Dodd: Actually it's five years. I don't count so hot.
Reply

RussianTaco was starred RussianTaco was unstarred

Trulymadlyme
08/08/09

@RussianTaco: West Point is a fantastic deal so long as you're gay and you're okay with never, ever being able to openly serve...and well, being outed the moment you're up for a promotion (because let's be honest, that's how peeps get bounced).
Reply

Trulymadlyme was starred Trulymadlyme was unstarred

Conchie Birdie
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
That Forbes list makes no sense.
Personally, I chose what colleges to apply to based on Princeton review's Social Scene rankings... and, surprisingly, it worked out quite well.
Reply

Conchie Birdie was starred Conchie Birdie was unstarred

Nice Beaver
08/07/09

@Conchie Birdie: I applied to school's based on Playboy's 1992 "Girls of the Big Ten" issue and all I got was a stupid restraining order against me. Ann Arbor judges just don't understand romance.
Reply

Nice Beaver was starred Nice Beaver was unstarred

tigolbitties
08/07/09

@Nice Beaver: omg! i just visited michigan a few weekends ago and i am officially jealous. champaign-urbana is no ann arbor, and if i could i'd like to move my dept. to michigan so i can experience ann arbor all the time...
Reply

tigolbitties was starred tigolbitties was unstarred

Conchie Birdie
08/07/09

@Nice Beaver: Kinda like how Fairfield cops just don't understand fun? I feel ya.
Reply

Conchie Birdie was starred Conchie Birdie was unstarred

Nice Beaver
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
New Jersey Tech seems overrepresented in the negative categories. Maybe students thought they were applying to "New Jersey Techno."
Reply

Nice Beaver was starred Nice Beaver was unstarred

Heneage
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Forbes bases its rankings on how well a college scores at ratemyprofessor.com among other things. Apparently, having "hot" professors is critically important to the quality of a student's academic experience. Also, according to this list, Berkeley is the 73rd best school in the country - competing with the likes of Suwanee University of the South.
Reply

Heneage was starred Heneage was unstarred

Paul.B.Dodd
08/07/09

@Heneage: If "hotness" of the professors were a major factor I don't see how all the service academies came out in front of all the Florida schools.
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd was starred Paul.B.Dodd was unstarred

Niko Bellic
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
America's Best College is when I teach you how to tell bullshit on sight, for free. This Forbes list is bullshit.
Reply

Niko Bellic was starred Niko Bellic was unstarred

DahlELama
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Oh whatever, this list is so skewed. How about "Most pathetic protests"? "Most self-entitled bitches"? "Least amount of awareness as to the actual meaning of democratic process"?
Also, listing both Barnard and Columbia in "best neighborhood" is a serious WTF. Especially since, somehow, GW is between them.
Reply

DahlELama was starred DahlELama was unstarred

___
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Vassar is the best college if you are a straight male because there is 1 man per every 4 woman and 75% of those men are gay so it is more like 1 straight man per every 12 women.Its like being Jon Gosselin at a sorority party 24/7!!
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd promoted this comment Edited by ___ at 08/07/09 3:20 PM ___ was starred ___ was unstarred

Paul.B.Dodd
08/07/09

@Her Madgesty: No one told me this when I was applying to college. Actually someone told me Vassar is an all-girls school. Bastard.
Reply

Paul.B.Dodd was starred Paul.B.Dodd was unstarred

Z und Vielpunkt's chick
08/07/09

@Her Madgesty: The same is true of Sarah Lawrence. Except that 3/4 of the women are lesbians, which complicates the equation.
Reply

Awesome X
08/07/09

In reply to College Rankings Totally Made Up
Are college rankings like those poetry submission scams, the ones where college dropouts submit their awful poetry and then get letters saying their awful crap is being published, but they'll have to pay $50 to get the book? Like that?
Reply

Edited by Awesome X at 08/07/09 3:12 PM Awesome X was starred Awesome X was unstarred

Earlier discussions Other discussions Show all discussions Show featured discussions only Start a new discussion

SUBSCRIBE TO Gawker

Login

Reset Password

Register

Submit Your Comment