Anything that can be pitched as a startup acquires an undeserved sheen. It’s not a water bottle; it’s a hydration system. This isn’t an overpriced group home from hell; it’s a Brooklyn co-living space.
Brooklyn—the brand—is more popular than ever. It’s the hottest thing in Paris fashion! What can Brooklyn—the city—get from this, besides exasperating trend stories? Perhaps something useful.
A real estate website marketing expensive luxury condos in Fort Greene, Brooklyn boasts that former neighborhood residents “include household names like Malcolm X.” In fact Malcolm X never lived in Brooklyn, though he did love gentrification.
Trendsetting neighborhood Williamsburg, Brooklyn will soon have more than half a dozen new hotels, including one with a 30-seat lounge inside a rooftop water tower, “Which might sound like some inspired repurposing, but this is new construction — they’re building a new water tower for the watering hole.”
Renters at the most expensive building in one of the most rapidly gentrifying neighborhoods in the least affordable housing market in America are receiving "insane" monthly heating bills of up to $700 for a two-bedroom apartment. Disabling the heat in all of Brooklyn's new condos could solve a lot of problems at once.
The beautiful borough of Brooklyn, New York is home to almost 2.6 million people, and none of them can afford to live there.
Williamsburg, Brooklyn has often been referred to as a neighborhood of "hipsters" but now robots live there. [Image of "hipster" neighborhood via]
The music industry has shifted from a business model of "selling albums" to a business model of " sell out hard as hell and hope to get your song in an ad campaign." Now, bands can directly pimp themselves out to the Sour Patch Kids™ brand in exchange for room and board.
Fort Greene is one of the loveliest, and most expensive, neighborhoods in Brooklyn. It's the neighborhood that inspired Spike Lee's anti-gentrification rant earlier this year. Wealthy Fort Greene dog owners will not put up with homeless people, in the park.
In Brooklyn, America's Coolest Land Area, the "name of the game" is staying one step ahead of the tidal wave of gentrification that wants to swallow you and price you out of your own neighborhood. Bad news: it's time to find the "next" Brooklyn neighborhood.
Vice Media is the tech bubble. Vice Media is not as cool as you think. Vice Media is about to get very, very rich. But what is Vice, above all? Vice is Williamsburg.
A city of 2.5 million is now home to a venue for a sport that has been in the Olympics for more than a century. What will those hipsters think of next?
"I would not consider it fair if someone in Williamsburg were complaining that we weren't portraying Williamsburg in an accurate light," says a TV location scout, "considering that person probably just moved here from Ohio." It's too hard to tell who to dislike in Williamsburg these days.
Someone at the New York Times Style section should be fired for getting scooped on this "New hipsters fight old hipsters in Bushwick" story.
Another Thursday, another New York Times Style section faux-trend story about Williamsburg. It's all a bit tedious, isn't it? Since these stories are written primarily to generate blog posts by people like us, we feel entitled to demand a few changes in how this neighborhood is covered, moving forward.
Brooklyn Is Everywhere, And Everywhere Is Brooklyn:
Williamsburg, which our nation's greatest newspaper has scientifically determined to be the only neighborhood in New York City that really matters, is responsible for the invention of the swimming pool, the cocktail party, and the man bun. What will the hip young creatives in this hot and happening area give to…
Cool, edgy parents who hold their babies with one hand have been observing for years that infants are like drunk people. They can barely hold their heads up! They’re always bursting into tears! They’re steady tryin' to suck on titties in public! Now, New Yorkers have found a way to make their children even more like…
For the past few years, the only thing preventing Williamsburg babies from sleeping soundly at naptime was their crippling #FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). A sleeping baby can't check out Mateo's great new loft space. A sleeping baby can't purchase a $4 locally brined pickle.
It's not just that you don't have anything interesting to say about Brooklyn; we don't have anything interesting to say about Brooklyn. Neither blogs, nor magazines, nor newspapers, nor serious academic thinkers, nor urban planners, nor philosophers, nor international jet-setters, nor fashion mavens, nor foodies, nor…
