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1. Baby Mama.Hateful fear-mongering neo-fascist moron Michelle Malkin—who we thought had given up on Fox after her beef with Geraldo?—popped up the other day to abuse Michelle Obama. The on-screen chyron, inexplicably, referred to the candidate's wife as "Obama's Baby Mama." Because he's black, and that is a term black people use, you see. Because they have so many children out of wedlock... unlike the Obamas.... Really, it makes absolutely no fucking sense. Whatever.
Result: A producer admitted to exercising poor judgment. See, he accidentally judged black black people to be irresponsible and all-the-same. Whoops!

2. Madrassa!
So you know those racist crazy emails the relatives you don't like that much send you? Those emails ended up at Fox, and they did a whole news story on it! Fox reported that Barack Obama secretly attended a Muslim Madrassa, which is secret Islam-talk for "terrorist school for Islamo-fascist tots." In fact he went to a secular public school, but it was in Indonesia, where, as we all know, people speak funny crazy terrorist talk instead of Christian English.

Result: As seen in the clip above, CNN took Fox to task in a heartening segment correcting all the rumors. Steve Doocy, though, just acted like an ass when it came time to "apologize."

3. Assassinate Osama!
Former Washington Times editor Liz Trotta: ""And now we have what some are reading as a suggestion that somebody knock off Osama, uh Obama. Well, both, if we could." Ok, Liz! You fucking nutcase.
Result: She apologized. That was about it.

4. Lynching Party USAThis one's actually a little tricky. Shouty mad-man Bill "FUCKING THING SUCKS" O'Reilly suggested to a caller that we (we?) should not organize a lynching party and go after Michelle Obama. It is actually on odd case, because Bill—who was astounded to learn recently that some black people use silverware just like grown-ups—used incredibly racially-charged language in what was actually an utterly uncharacteristic defense of Michelle Obama. But Jesus, Bill, "lynching party"? Maybe you shouldn't have done it live.
Result: The requisite apology, complete with the typical failure to take responsibility for his own goddamn words (he blames Clarence Thomas! So many high-tech lynchings, these days, what with the internet not having been taken back yet and all).

5. Terrorist fist-jab. Interchangeable blonde hostess E.D. Hill (right) opened a segment on the meaning of the "body language" behind Barack Obama's affectionate fist-bump with his wife by calling it a "terrorist fist-bump," an insane characterization comparable only to the craziest of anonymous online commenter discourse.
Result: E.D. Hill gave a disingenuous half-apology. Then, oddly, her show was canceled. This particular slur, while idiotic and disgusting, was not much worse than the rest of the ones presented here. So... sea change on the way? We've been wrong before, of course.

And Lacey, good job of respecting the crowd you were speaking to on the 40th anniversary of MLK's death:

Billye Paulson, a black journalist who works for the Tribune, called the speech "offensive" and fired off an angry e-mail to Lacey demanding an apology.

"I found your acceptance speech at the April 4 SPJ awards banquet disgusting, inappropriate and vulgar. And I DID take offense. But the obscenities take a back seat to the use of the n-word, which was not necessary and very insulting," she wrote in the e-mail.

Paulson attended the event with the 82-year-old mother of the late Tribune sports writer Bob Moran, a black journalist who died last month from cancer. His mother was there to accept a special recognition award on behalf of her son.

So how much contrition has Lacey shown for his remark—the classic fatal mistake of white men who mistakenly believe they're down enough to say whatever they want—delivered to an audience including grandmothers? He's sorry that his "comments about a dead colleague rankled listeners."

"My words, meant to honor a friend, were inappropriate," Lacey said. "All present have my sincere apology. It is regrettable that any phrase of mine offended those attending a First Amendment awards banquet."

He's sorry the sticks in the mud in the audience are oversensitive enough to get offended. They probably didn't realize he was down.

This is not only the thousandth demonstration of the fact that Mike Lacey is, by all appearances, an asshole; it is also a reminder to whites everywhere: JUST LEAVE THAT WORD ALONE, FOR GOD'S SAKE. Whether ending in -er or -a, it is not for you.

[via Romenesko]