THE Flâneurs:

Liam McMullan: The 19-year old son of the 80s most infamous air-kissing, matchmaking, Hilton-pose-perfecting photographer Patrick McMullan, Liam is not only easy on the eyes but shockingly sweet. We hear he has a screenplay in the works, but before rolling any eyes, note his rumored inspiration for one scene: that fateful February evening when Julia Allison and Hud Morgan fought over the title of teenage soap star Leven Rambin's Fakest Friend With Biggest Blow Job Fetish.



Paul Johnson Calderone: Having perfected the art of wearing ass-tight denim shorts and bowler caps without shame, the Papermag.com blogger (recently promoted to Market Editor) and Peter Davis arm candy is the closest thing New York has to Michael Alig these days (minus all the glitter and tendency to murder rival queens mid-meth rage.)

Sean Glass: This Manhattan-born, Dalton-educated filmmaker is slowly-but-finally making his mark with short films starring friends like Liam and Byrdie Bell at underground film festivals—after impatiently-but-determinedly wading through Emerson's film school program. A reputable ladies' man.

James Cruickshank: Known by some as "J.C.", "that Hamptons kid whose proctologist dad threw him some cash to live out his childhood dream of presiding over a skateboard company," and, of course, "Annabelle Dexter-Jones' boyfriend," James and his childhood crew are responsible for LOLA, the high-end t-shirt line named after their beloved childhood skate park in the Hamptons. The then-12-year old posse's public protest against Southampton's rent-a-cop division's decision to shut it down was quasi-legendary and successful. (Back in 1995, when pot clouds prompted Hamptstein cops to close the tween version of the hidden-from-sight hilltop version of Beatrice hangout, James and his droogs held a town-wide petition against the Mayor, complete with a mini-parade.)

Michael Martin: Rare handsome straight young rich under-the-radar charmer, head of the National Arts Club's Junior Committee. Single, freelance art writer (New York magazine, for example)

THE NEW EDIES

Kelley Hoffman: After internships with Vogue and New York mag, the SoCal native and Smith graduate recently left her job in Vogue's Creative Services dept. to break out on her own as a rapidly successful style writer for refinery29.com—and is known as the cutest dancer at Beatrice. Instead of using the dusty "high/low" aesthetic, she prefers "low/low," perfecting her look as a snow-blonde, thick-banged Chloe Sevigny lookalike with better boobs and a penchants for vintage Betty Page one-piece swimsuits worn as tops underneath American Apparel mini-skirts.

Molly Friedman: Comeback kid. After following in many a magazine editor's footsteps by putting a couple of perfumes on eBay, the daughter of novelist and screenwriter Bruce Jay Friedman has finally moved on after her 2006 banishment from Conde Nast. After toiling away for our own sister site Defamer.com, Friedman is currently finishing a novel said to be Alice in Wonderland meets Vile Bodies.

Lizzy Fraser: The ghost of Edie Sedgwick reincarnate: model, Columbia undergrad, Warholophile and photographer favoring self-portraits of herself surrounded by a minimum of four mirrors in varying sizes and shapes. See lizfraseronline.com.

Harley Viera Newton: See here.

Annabelle Dexter-Jones: The one Dexter-Jones-Ronson kid to avoid controversy, this girlfriend of James Cruickshank shies away from anything "coke den"-related. She's moved on from modeling for half-sister Charlotte Ronson and Teen Vogue to simply smiling her way through after-hours Manhattan.


THE NEW "SOCIALISTS":

Summer Rej: Born and raised on Park and 68th, the Calhoun- and Cornell-educated blonde who began toiling for Vogue's business side days after graduation recently hosted a garden party to launch her own jewelry line 3 Blondes. The event, its guests, and the line itself merited coverage on parkavepeerage.com, and garnered three times as many comments from notoriously vicious Park Avenue Peerage readers than otherwise innocuous and repetitious posts on former social stars like Amanda Hearst and Olivia Palermo.

Pamela Love (right): See here.

DJ Nick Cohen: UES rich kid turned famous DJ and sneaker brand entrepreneur

Joey Goodwin (right): Palm Beach- and UES-raised, Goodwin is the actual designer behind Unruly Heir, despite Kristian Lalliberte's offensive decision to portray himself as the face of the brand. Rumor is that Goodwin is planning on firing Lalliberte ASAP.

See also: Rebecca Schiffman

THE NEW ARISTOCRACY:

Rory Guinness: Yes, the long-haired front man for iLash is a bonafide heir to the Irish beer empire, but rumor has it that he refuses the monthly trust fund deposit entrusted to him (and sister/Vanity Fair scribe Rebecca Guinness) choosing instead to take the bohemian, starving-artist approach when it comes to
reputation.

Marissa Bregman: daughter of Scarface producer Marty Bregman.

James "Carlton" DeWoody III: Son of Rudin Management heiress/Upper East Side art collector Beth Rudin and artist Jim DeWoody, Carlton fools most partygoers into thinking he's a poor man's Dash Snow with his oddly-shaped glasses and skinny white jeans. But the underground artist and designer of both The Big Empty's album cover and Vornado's logo is a closeted hottie who inspired a group of 50 media-centric partygoers to chant "OBAMA!" on a Chelsea rooftop this past April, despite wearing a fur-lined hat and shearling winter jacket.

Mickey Sumner: When you're the daughter of Trudie Styler and Sting, blonde, Fieldston-educated, and grew up in a Central Park West apartment (complete with one room occupied only by Sting's vintage guitar collection), the natural progression to actress/model is tempting. But after a half-hearted attempt to join the Richards sisters and Liv Tyler among rock royalty's laundry list of quasi-talented pretty young things, Sumner quickly chose art over artifice—drawing, photographing, and paintings. She also stars in her friends' short films; see Michaelimagirl.com.

See also: Tess Brokaw

Nightlife and Bungalow 8 queen Amy Sacco, Andrew Kennedy, Ronson mom Ann Dexter-Jones, former Dalton teacher and Schooled author Anisha Lakhani, professional gossip Ben Widdicombe, Bronson Van Wyck (the expressway was named after his family), Caroline Rowley, Charles Rockefeller, Charlotte Ronson, Danielle Vreeland, NYLON magazine's Dani Stahl, David Gruning, socialblogger David Patrick Columbia, Social Life magazine's Devorah Rose, New York magazine's Emily Nussbaum, socialite Fabiola Beracasa, someone named "Hannah Chadwick Tippy Tart," Mens Vogue's dandy Hud Morgan, soccer player Aaron Chandler, clothing designer Izzy Gold, Lauren Bush, Misshape's Leigh Lezark, model-actress Natasha Henstridge, rock-and-roll photographer Mick Rock, attorney Petra Von Ziegesar, society photographer Patrick McMullan, a bunch of Soho House people, and socialite Olivia Palermo (she once told Page Six magazine she wants to be a "brand" when she grows up.)

God, I need a drink.

Update! From charity:water:

"Emma has now raised more than $8,000 for water wells in Africa. She's helped more than 1,000 people get clean and safe drinking water and has been a tireless supporter of the cause. It just kills us to see her crucified because we gave her bad information. We take full responsibility for the mistake, she used our online Spread the Word widget and was given incorrect information by a volunteer that it would NOT reveal her friend’s addresses (she asked). It is entirely our fault. we feel awful and apologize sincerely to all her contacts."

"LuAnn is nothing if not an all-American girl. I think she’s even of Native American descent. She may be sophisticated, married as long as she has been, but the patina of a European “countess” is not there."

Oh, come on. DPC isn't any more of a member of society that crass LuAnn is: he used to own a head shop in upstate New York, and has worked as a stockbroker, a freelancer, and a sportswear designer (?). So cut the snobbery! He and LuAnn have more in common than he thinks: they're both from humble backgrounds (David's the son of a chauffeur and a building super, LuAnn used to be a LPN), and both have made careers out of being hangers-on. What's not to like?

This just in: Lydia wrote us—and you—a letter!

From: Lydia Hearst-Shaw
Date: August 7, 2008 2:02:39 PM EDT
To: tips@gawker.com

I do not care what you say about me. I am a fan of Gawker! I think you guys have a very clever site with a witty take on celebrities, gossip and current events. I understand that people enjoy to read the negative articles about public figures and indulge in hiding behind an anonymous account and blog posts. Honestly, I'm surprised that anyone takes so much time out of their day to comment. I have a sense of humor when it comes to everything that is written and do not take any of it personally. Let's just clear a couple things up... I hope that by now you do realize that the situation with Aubrey was a scene for a film I have been working on between NYC and LA by director/designer Tara Subkoff for the new BeBe collection out this fall (remember ). I have a boyfriend. Also, there is absolutely no feud with the Hiltons. And as far as my name, let's get one thing straight - My legal name is Lydia Hearst-Shaw, professionally I am known as Lydia Hearst. Just so everyone is aware, the decision to use Hearst was made by my agents years ago when I began my career in modeling - course I have made this quite relevant is multiple interviews in the past. I love my family and they are more important to me than anything else in this world.

And, I do love Gawker, so keep up the good work and enjoy the rest of summer.

Lydia

Alex Linder, the head of the neo-Nazi Vanguard News Network (VNN), was particularly incensed. “It’s not that small a deal,” wrote Linder to a defender of Chloe Black who was minimizing the importance of her comments. “It shows that at the end of the day money matters more than principle to WN [White Nationalist] leaders.”

...At least one prominent anti-Semite defended Black: April Gaede, mother of the teen twins who make up the neo-Nazi singing group Prussian Blue. “Very few people in White Nationalism have the ability to earn a living openly being racial,” wrote Gaede. “If she can earn a living and support her family and nationalism then who cares.”

However, Gaede’s post was not well received. “But at the cost of helping the muds and jews? Don’t be stupid,” wrote “Akingu” on VNN. “That’s like teaching an attack dog to attack yourself!”

The commenters are also upset at Chloe Black's husband Don for recently banning from his website Nazi symbols like the swastika and SS lighting bolts, along with the word n—--r.

It's going to be so awkward for Chloe Black at the next big white separatist convention. Maybe she and her husband can make new racist friends at that charter school Fanjul is bankrolling with money from her and her Cuban American husband's sugar empire. You know, the one for the poor children of impoverished migrant workers.

[Southern Poverty Law Center]

(Photo of Emilia Fanjul: New York Social Diary)

"I decided to get going on Schooled at the Carlyle Hotel where my dad often took me for breakfast before beginning my Dalton days. The main dining room was always a power scene on weekday mornings and I’d leave feeling charged. These unique ways I sometimes began my days weren’t atypical for children who grew up in ‘the bubble’. When applied correctly, privilege cultivates intellect... I wasn’t special for the fact that I had caught Meet the Press or read so and so’s Op-Ed."

It sounds like these Dalton kids are indeed very high-minded! So what's a Dalton grad like Brill doing blogging for free about the Hamptons and C-list party-benefits?

[Essentially Emily]

The Southern Poverty Law Center noticed, in a magazine piece about Emilia and her work with the school, this innocuous-looking line: "For more information about Glades Academy, call Chloe Black." That name probably doesn't mean much to you, but it's very familiar to a group like the SPLC, which battles racist organizations.

Chloe Black used to be married to David Duke. Former national leader of the KKK David Duke. Straight-up neo-Nazi David Duke.

While less visible in the white supremacist world than either of her husbands, Black has a strong movement history of her own. She met Duke at a college meeting of the White Youth Alliance in the 1970s, and, after marrying him, became vice president of his Knights of the Ku Klux Klan. She long held the copyright to African Atto, a weird 1973 booklet that instructs blacks on how to kill whites — and which was written, as was revealed by enterprising reporters, by Duke, who then claimed he was using it to compile a list of “radical blacks.”

Yes but that was years ago, you say! People change! Sure. Her next husband was Don Black. Another former Klan leader! But far, far more famous these days for founding and operating the most notoriously hateful site on the internet: Stormfront. Look it up yourself if you don't know the deal—it's generally considered poor Internet form to mention it, let alone link. It's basically a neo-Nazi message board. Fucked up shit goes on there.

Don Black claims to be unemployed, though he pays to operate Stormfront all on his own in a house owned entirely by his wife Chloe. And where does Chloe get her cash? From Emilia Fanjul, the Cuban-American sugar magnate socialite! Black is an executive assistant at Florida Crystals, the Fanjuls' sugar conglomerate. They had no comment.

They maybe didn't even know! Though a GOOGLE SEARCH would've revealed that in recent years Chloe Black has attended the conferences of hate groups and says lovely things about David Duke to the press.

So yes a neo-Nazi is flacking for a school designed to help poor minority children out of poverty, and using the money she makes to run a site dedicated to raising hatred and inciting violence against those little kids. And a wealthy socialite is involved!

WTF.

[Photo of Emilia Fanjul: New York Social Diary]

Oh, it's about socialite Tinsley Mortimer's sister-in-law, Minnie. Minnie's brother is Paper magazine's Peter Davis. Minnie has a line of clothing to hawk:

Each of the apparel pieces in the collection is named after one of her best friends. "These are the people that I've known since I was five years old." Distance makes the heart grow weary, and the two months she will spend in her beloved Southampton is the time of the year she looks forward to the most. Stephen taught her to surf the waves in Biarritz, Mustique, and in St. Bart's, where they honeymooned, and Minnie wants to take him to Flying Point Beach, so she can share with him the coastal community that she loves more than any other in the world. She plans on staying put once she gets here and intends on visiting Manhattan only rarely. Minnie asks, "Why leave when everything I need and everyone I love is here?"

[Hamptons Style]

James Franco was at The Whitney Art Party last night with a surgically attached girlfriend and literal hangers-on. Watching him carry the weight of those four people all night was exhausting. In my memory it was like they all had their arms draped around his neck and he was just dragging them along like some kind of human cloak. I was drunk though.

[EssentiallyEmily]

1. College:
Hearst: attended Sacred Heart University. But did she graduate?
Hilton: did not go to college

2. Television:
Hearst: small role on Gossip Girl.
Hilton: Five seasons of The Simple Life, guest-starred on The O.C..

3. Journalism:
Hearst: monthly Page Six mag column.
Hilton: a 2004 autobiography, Confessions of an Heiress: A Tongue-in-Chic Peek Behind the Pose. (An awesome work of literature—in its own, ghostwritten way.)

4 Fashion/Modeling:
Hearst: ad campaigns for Sephora, Italian Vogue.
Hilton: has appeared in major ad campaigns, including those for her own perfume, as well as countless magazines.

5. "Designing":
Hearst: designed some purses and athletic wear for Puma/Heatherette.
Hilton: designed some purses for Samantha Thavasa, and some jewelry for Amazon.com

Sorry, Lydia, but Paris wins! Paris wins!

Blasberg, who was once implicated in conspiracy theories over who's really pulling New York's socialite strings, has appeared in a couple of pictures palling around with the younger Bush—including one of them sitting next to each other at a New York Rangers game:

So what conclusions can we draw from this weighty evidence?

1. Derek Blasberg likes hockey.
2. Barbara Bush likes hockey, or at least likes attending hockey games in the company of Derek Blasberg.
3. As well as doing some other stuff about town with Derek Blasberg.
4. Hockey may or may not become a standard event for the socialites of New York to attend.
5. Blasberg and Bush have not been photographed together at a Knicks game.
6. The Knicks suck way more than the Rangers.
7. In the words of the intrepid investigative blogger Eric McErlain himself, "Not a whole lot."

[AOL Fanhouse]

1. The New (New) Bohemian

Core Members: Tara Subkoff, Arden Wohl, Leigh Lezark, Stella Schnabel, Waris Ahluwalia, Chiara Clemente, Leelee Sobieski
Style.com says: With their creative-class roots and Opening Ceremony duds, these free-spirit types are giving the anemic benefit circuit a badly needed shot in the arm. Find them anywhere "It" is at—from fancy galas to the smoky back room at the Beatrice. Suggested conversation starters? Indie filmmaking, whatever patron saint Chloë Sevigny is up to now, headbands.
Absurd quote: "We're always looking for answers. Some people are looking for it in a socialite maybe. But you know, it just depresses me: Some girl named Peaches who lives in the Bronx…looks at this world and says, 'Oh wow.' And I would never want to give off something that is an illusion, because you hurt people that way. And they're already struggling so much—the people." —Arden Wohl
We say: If these people are bohemians, then we're a goddamn mango. There's nothing free-spirited about putting on a $4,000 dress you didn't pay for and then hitting a $10,000-a-plate dinner (which you also didn't pay for), even if you follow it up with a night of indoor smoking at "The Bee." Anybody who uses "headbands" as a conversation starter should be punched in the face immediately, and have their headband stolen so they no longer have anything to talk about.

2. The European Union

Core Members: Vladimir Roitfeld, Julia Restoin-Roitfeld, Tatiana Santo Domingo, Margherita Missoni, Stavros Niarchos, Andrea Casiraghi
Style.com says: What do young moneyed Euros do in New York? Stick together. More cliquish than seventh-grade girls, this group's regular haunts include Cipriani, Da Silvano, and anywhere else that can charge $35 for a plate of pasta and keep a straight face. They also congregate at the Washington Square Park town house of longtime couple Tatiana Santo Domingo (the Colombian beer heiress) and Andrea Casiraghi (Princess Caroline of Monaco and Hanover's son). Margherita Missoni, who dates Casiraghi's stepbrother, Ernst of Hanover, is arguably the most outgoing of the bunch (and the most liable to mingle with the other social groups). But Stavros Niarchos, who's reportedly romanced Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, has his own unique way of sampling American culture.
Absurd quote: "I've been in New York for four years now, and I feel that I have done it. It's a place where you can be busy all the time without ever doing anything." — Margherita Missoni.
We say: Busy all the time without doing anything? They could have a career in blogging — if they had careers. Apparently, one of the E.U.'s favorite "hotspots" is the British Airways' entertainment space at JFK, which pipes in the scent of freshly cut grass (you can't have them breathing QUEENS AIR, after all). Also, Stavros Niarchos? Bring your Valtrex prescription!

3. The Swans 2.0

Core Members: Amanda Hearst, Tinsley Mortimer, Fabiola Beracasa, Lauren Santo Domingo, Zani Gugelmann, Claire Bernard
Style.com says: This group is a closed set. Olivia Palermo, for example, has yet to recover from last spring's misstep—you know, when the now-defunct Web site Socialiterank.com published a letter that Palermo supposedly penned, apologizing for her status-seeking ways. It's still unclear if the missive was a hoax or an honest plea, but, no matter, it fell on deaf ears. Palermo's persistence has kept her at some of the parties, but not all the right ones. If you're not in the club yet, you probably won't be. Meanwhile, these socials—now inching into their thirties—can do no wrong. Tinsley Mortimer made a questionable move, posing for the cover of the New York Post's weekend glossy, Page Six Magazine, and no one blinked a false eyelash.
Absurd quote: "Paris Hilton brought to light the existence of the socialite to Middle America and the world. Before, it was either models or actresses—but socialites were, most times, born into this lifestyle. That's what fascinates people. It's a continuous lifestyle that people are fascinated by. But it's not all the media's fault. You know, it's us posing for the cameras and going out and exploiting the spotlight for our careers." —Fabiola Beracasa
We say: Olivia dodged a bullet, wethinks. Actually plenty of people blinked (and cringed and shuddered) at Tinsley's neurotic, self-consumed weight loss confessional. Also, no one really became "fascinated" with Paris until she started getting naked. Pretty much no one in Middle America has ever heard of Zani Gugelmann. In fact, they probably think that's the name of the ring master at Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey's Circus.

4. The Art Stars

Core Members: Dan Colen, Dash Snow, Ryan McGinley, Aaron Young, Nate Lowman, Mirabelle Marden, Melissa Bent, Amy Greenspon
Style.com says: Despite their "whatever, dude" mien, Colen, Snow, and their scruffy tribe of Lost Boys know that a gift for self-promotion is just as important as having a way with a paintbrush. Their biggest sell—apart from their actual art, of course—is their cooler-than-thou posse, of which everyone below 14th Street seems to want to be a part. "You realize that, like, your social context has a lot to do with, like, your success," Colen recently articulated.
Absurd quote: "It's funny to me that Dash [Snow] has become like a rock star, but he's so paranoid. That comes from graffiti culture—like, you want everybody to know who you are and you're going to write your name all over the city, but you can't let anyone know who you really are. It's, like, this idea of being notorious." —Ryan McGinley
We say: Full disclosure: We know next to nothing about art, so we can't even tell you if these dudes actually sell their shit. But everything you need to know can be found in the phrase "cooler-than-thou posse." And a person's popularity (excuse us, their "social context") shouldn't be determined by their success. It should be determined by the quality of their drugs.

5. The Catwalk Queens

Core Members: Lisa Cant, Gemma Ward, Lily Donaldson, Caroline Winberg
Style.com says: The only thing more intimidating than standing next to a model at a party is standing next to four models at a party. Especially when they're all giggling and taking pictures of each other on their camera phones and just generally having a waaay better time then you are. Curious as to how this sorority of gorgeousness operates, we turned to our trusted source on the inside, who gamely broke down the group dynamic: "Lily is the funny one, although Lisa has a good sense of humor, too. Gemma started off timid, because she's a long way from Australia, but is now comfy being a ringleader. And Caroline is just always up for a good time." So there you have it. Oh, and there's this: Aside from Donaldson, who dates Vladimir Roitfeld, everyone's single. Gentlemen, start your engines. (OK, forget it, you have no chance.)
Refreshingly non-absurd quote: "I had come straight from my auntie and uncle's farm, and I was wearing this big gray barn jacket with mud all over it. When the scout came up to me, I said, 'No, thank you.' But my friends were like, 'Hell, yes!' They forged my mum's signature and pushed me in front of the cameras." —Gemma Ward on breaking into modeling
We say: Anyone who's ever stood next to four models at a party and had to duck to avoid their protruding, malnourished sternums knows that it's usually more frightening than intimidating. What looks great in a picture can be kind of horrifying in person.

6. The New Kids on the Blog

Core Members: Leven Rambin, Hud Morgan, Mary Rambin, Julia Allison, Emily Brill, Devorah Rose, Annabel Vartanian, Kristian Laliberte
Style.com says: This year's crop of newbies owes a lot to the gossip bloggers who, under pressure to churn out a certain number of posts a day, are always ready to make a scandal out of a tidbit. Gawker.com's obsessive coverage of Julia Allison (including plenty of bikini shots) heightened the Star magazine editor's profile immeasurably. In case readers are itching to know more, there's always Allison's own navel-gazing site, Itsmejulia.com. In fact, a lot of these kids have turned to the Internet to document the minutiae of their daily life, from party-hopping (Emily Brill's Essentiallyemily.com) to Restylane injections (Mary Rambin's Stylebymaryrambin.com). If Truman Capote, notorious divulger of social secrets, were around today, he'd be out of a job.
Absurd quote: "I want to be New York's answer to Rachel Zoe…. Yeah, Nicole Richie did fire her and called her a bitch, but you know she worked her way up to that. She's one of my idols." —Kristian Laliberte
We say: Oh noes! It's all our fault! At the risk of adding fuel to the fire, we'll just say this: The last time we saw Leven Rambin she was getting her hair did at our salon a few months ago. She texted the entire time. While she was getting her hair washed, some man friend perched on the end of the chair facing her and she had her legs up in the air draped OVER HIS SHOULDERS. Then she ran out on the bill.

In large type on the invitation, you find the names of chairs and co-chairs, those boldface attendants who, often in lieu of paying, draw into involvement the names below them. Those include the honorary chairs, dance chairs, benefit committee members and underwriters.

"It's basically a pyramid scheme," says the 25-year-old event planner Martin Dawson.

Meet the Free Ballers [Page Six Magazine]

[Photo: Karin Kohlberg]

There are a lot of people who—they're just too rich. I mean, I remember several years ago I went to have dinner one night on the yacht of a very, very rich man. He has just built this big, huge... I think it was 300 feet or something like that. It was enormous; it was parked in New York Harbor, on the West Side.

And he gave a dinner party. As we were leaving the party, I hitched a ride in the taxi with a man who—he's now passed away—but he was a very successful, very well-known, and very wealthy businessman. And he was telling me that this particular man who owned this yacht was also very—he's still alive, but he was a very old man at the time—wanted to get in on another business deal.

He was talking about the business deal he was getting in on and he was saying, 'You know, the problem with these guys is they're just bored. Because actually, they have more money than they can spend even the income on. But they just want to make more money because it's something to do.'

Says DPC of Erica:

She has spent time with Mrs. Clinton and she knows that she is a woman who will look after the children. Not all women, she said, are interested and not all men can, but Hillary will. Her record already speaks it. This was all expressed by Erica very quietly and matter of factly. I saw Hillary Clinton somewhat differently.

Later on in the day I was thinking about our conversation. These are very uneasy times for many. So many people talk about the political campaigns with confoundment and no strong feelings in any direction. Disappointment is almost a given. Is it the time, or is it the way life is.

As to avoid dragging Designers For Darfur into some sort of public scandal or faux feud between Lydia Hearst and myself, I have decided to share my side of the story with the Gawker after reading the article printed in today's New York Post "Exploited Name". It has been made blatantly apparent that the folks of the New York Post will not give me fair shake against their "celebrity reporter" Lydia Hearst, and I simply would like to have my side of the story told....

When Designers For Darfur was originally formed, Lydia Hearst and I agreed that we would hold periodic events and initiatives in order to raise awareness, particularly within fashion industry, as to the ongoing crisis/genocide currently taking place in Darfur.... Unfortunately, Lydia's participation in the "real work" and/or "decision making process" for these events and initiatives left a great deal to be desired. That being said, Lydia and I both have always known the deal - the trade was simple - we do "all" the real work and you use your name to promote the events (the absolute least a "co-founder" should be able to do is to show up, look pretty for the cameras, and smile)... I can assure you that I have taken no great pleasure in always having to explain Lydia's absence at every single event instead of focusing on explaining to guests what they can do to assist in ending the genocide taking place in the Sudan.

Whilst Lydia is most certainly a delightful person and I have nothing bad to say about her character, I do believe that today's breed of "socialite" simply pales in comparison to the ideals set forth by great women such as Brooke Astor, Nan Kempner, Pat Buckley and many others that felt innately compelled to participate in a lifetime of charitable efforts. I simply believe that Ms. Hearst wasn't fully aware of the seriousness nature of the "grassroots" organization that she "committed" to join. It is my belief that Ms. Hearst was under the impression that after the "runway shows" and "pretty parties" the folks in Darfur would certainly now be out of harms way.... Unfortunately a crisis as serious at the situation in the Sudan does not simply go away after the disco ball of the most recent gala stops spinning....

You must forgive me for my heartfelt response, but I don't have the luxury of being able to afford a mouthpiece or publicist to speak on my behalf therefore, I am more than willing to be Malcolm Harris/designer/activist/"party-promoter"/humanitarian/or backslash anything else... But what I do have on my side is the sheer commonsense of humanity... I continue to wish Lydia Hearst well in all of her efforts.

Best regards,

Malcolm Harris

She continues:

It's going up to $81 now. The subway is the easiest and cheapest way to get around. And unfortunately it's the only way during rush hour. I am in favor of the congestion tax, though. People who live and work here all year round should get some sort of exemption sticker and driving visitors should be taxed. Traffic is getting out of control.

According to Rush & Molloy, that new film by creator of the worst T.V. series ever Aaron Sorkin called Charlie Wilson's War and also according to anyone with access to the internet and/or facts, Ms. Herring was instrumental in the United States' decision to launch a covert CIA operation in Afghanistan, supplying the mujahideen with weapons with which to combat the Soviets after their 1979 invasion.

That year, Ms. Herring smuggled herself, her son and a filmmaker into Afghanistan and documented the Soviet atrocities. She took the footage to Washington where her husband Charlie Wilson, a US Congressman, transferred more than 300 million Pentagon dollars to the mujahideen.

Aaron Sorkin, in his usual dumb, literal, obvious Aaron Sorkin way, suggests that United States actions in Afghanistan in the 70s and 80s had some causation with the events of September 11, 2001. (No kidding!) The last shot of the movie (starring Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts!) was supposed to have been "a shot of the Pentagon in flames, implying that Herring and Wilson had abetted Osama Bin Laden and his Al Qaeda crew."

But Sorkin rolled over in the face of Herring's objections and that scene was cut. Also:

Herring also didn't cotton to the way Sorkin had Roberts swearing, spouting evangelical screeds and engaging in martini-fueled romps with Hanks.

"I didn't like the cursing, the drinking, the blatant sex," says the 78-year-old thrice-married Houston socialite, philanthropist and former talk show host. "They turned me into a kooky, hypocritical tart."

As he was slightly in his cups, Mr. Mortimer was quick to begin his indictment of the charity circuit. "What I'm saying is, I want to see some results from all these benefits," he said. "Do you think any of these people would be involved if they didn't get credit for it?"

But even though Tinsley comes across in this article, as usual, as a caricature of herself—"she arrived for an interview with a stack of press clippings and photographs of Graymont, the large house she grew up in. ("Because, you know, there are rumors that my father was like 'a carpet salesman,' and actually it's a family-owned carpet-manufacturing company.")—the Mortimers appear to have met cute and to... love each other?

Or he loves her, at least. On their introduction at boarding school: "It was a snowfall and she was walking across the campus with a couple of her friends and I just grabbed her and threw her in a snowbank. Anyway, that was my approach. She didn't like it but she was laughing so hard she couldn't breathe." And:

"I adore her," he said, affecting reluctance. She made a pouting face and said, "Adore me, Topper." "I don't care what anyone else thinks," he said. "If you want to live a certain way, I love you the same. I'll still be here."

The facelift king of America [Guardian]

The prime candidates for string-pulling action would seem to be James's former competitors Olga and Valentine Rei, the siblings behind the bizarre sociological experiment that was Socialite Rank. But they say they've got nothing to do with him and we sort of believe them! "We have not read his site for months. We're not sure anyone does. The only brief contact we've had with James was when he came to New York for the first time. We politely invited him to lunch and he was unfortunately too busy at the time. We wish him luck, though," Valentine sniffed.

A competing and perhaps more credible theory is that James may be the puppet of "writer" Derek Blasberg and muppet-faced socialite Fabiola Beracasa, who "gave James a list of what socials can and cannot be on it," according to a tipster who claims to have heard this from "a credible source."

"He stopped covering all the 'controversial' people, and all the black or asian people and the only people he puts are all the same. And just derek and lyle are the only guys." Fascinating! We've yet to hear back from James about this. Perhaps his dark overlords vet his correspondence.

Give Till It Hearst, Baby! [NYO]

i was sitting outside at la esquina, and i saw cory kennedy and genevieve jones. they were all dressed up with no place to go apparently because they circled the block a couple of times and then cory kennedy said, "well, we can wake up early and go to the gym! LOL!" i only overheard it because they were standing next to our table when it was said. ugh. genevieve jones is really unfortunate looking, by the way.

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Just Asking [Page Six]

I was recently at a luncheon in Manhattan, one of those socialite and magazine editor gatherings where photographers almost outnumber the wait staff. The party was hosted by a handful of boldfaced names and it was one of those boldfaced-named ladies, also a writer — let's call her Ms. Incredible — whom I was most excited to see that day. Ms. Incredible and I were talking during the pre-lunch 'cocktail' hour when another lady writer — let's call her Mrs. Brash — came up and said hello. I introduced myself to Mrs. Brash, who apparently sized me up as someone of limited importance because for the next 10 minutes she talked and talked, cutting me off almost every time I tried to jump into the conversation. I decided to cu