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Will Obama Shapeshift Into His True Reptilian Vampire Form Tonight at His Final State of the Union? Perhaps! If So, Gawker Will Liveblog It!

Tonight, at 9 p.m. Eastern, President Barack Obama will deliver his final State of the Union address to a joint session of Congress. The White House has promised a “non-traditional speech.” It’s a stretch, but that could mean the outgoing president will reveal himself to be a member of an interdimensional race of…

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