This morning on Fox & Friends, Fox News aired a straight-up, unadulterated four-minute attack ad mocking Obama's "Hope and Change" message and cataloguing the purported failures of his administration, complete with ominous music, depressing charts, and voiceover audio of Mitt Romney attacking him. Not someone else's…
This morning on Fox & Friends, Geraldo Rivera said unarmed black teenager Trayvon Martin's choice to wear a hooded sweatshirt in public "is as much responsible for Trayvon Martin's death as George Zimmerman was." He used the example of "a dark skinned kid like my son Cruz, who I constantly yelled at when he was going…
This morning on Fox and Friends, an unusually stupid walrus named Geraldo Rivera offered "a different take" on the case of Trayvon Martin, the unarmed black teenager gunned down in the street by a vigilante because he "looked suspicious." Tell us your take, Geraldo:
So the New York Times' Dining section wrote one of those things for Southern food yesterday that it writes for every type of food, at one point or another: How there's a new wave of chefs trying to revive traditional fare with more expensive and local ingredients, etc. "They want to reclaim the agrarian roots of…
Red alert in the War on Christmas: An elementary school in Stockton, California has banned poinsettias. Also, worshiping Santa Claus, and other holiday deities. The only appropriate response to this is that of Fox & Friends host Brian Kilmeade: "Who doesn't pray to Santa Claus?"
We're still pretty early into the holiday season, but lo, enemy forces have already entrenched themselves on a central front in this year's War on Christmas: Rhode Island, state of... whatever. The governor there — like other recent governors! — has decided to call the 17-foot blue spruce in the Statehouse a…
Fox & Friends co-host and celebrated public intellectual Brian Kilmeade could barely catch his breath today, as he shared the hot new rumor about Justin Bieber impregnating a lady.
The morning muppets on today's episode of Fox News' illiterate dementia variety hour, Fox & Friends, had much to discuss. Well, really only Herman Cain.
This morning on bad idea ball pit Fox & Friends, the melting Crisco sculpture known as Gretchen Carlson got outraged over a new program that requires "translation assistance" for the non-English speaking parents of Cleveland public school students. Boy was she mad!
This morning the clown-wigged sea snakes of Fox & Friends shifted from Christmas to Halloween, discussing some school principals who are waging war on school-time Halloween festivities. The sad outrage of it all!
Another day, another bit of time spent with the dilapidated horseshoe crabs over at Fox & Friends. Once again they were discussing this curious thing called Occupy Wall Street and today they focused on how these weirdos feed themselves.
The concerned swamp monsters over at Fox & Friends did a little profile in courage this morning, focusing on a young woman named Hannah Lucas who is saying NO to B. H. Obama's healthier school food initiatives.
The mumbling woodchucks over at Fox & Friends were discussing Texas governor Rick Perry's support of the DREAM Act this morning and, to provide an opposing voice, brought on two young men from Texas A&M's Texas Aggie Conservative Student Group.
The wheezing gophers over at Fox News' Fox & Friends spent a good deal of time this morning talking about the Occupy Wall Street protests, and then, as a service, decided to "give us a flavor" of just who's doin' this crazy thing.
Hank Williams, Jr., living monument to the irrelevance of genes in determining ability, appeared this morning on Fox & Friends to, as philosophe Steve Doocy put it, "break down the 2012 GOP field." And break down he did!
The chuckling cheeseburgers at Fox & Friends broached the topic of Chaz Bono, who injured his knee on Dancing with the Stars. All three hosts cringe at the mention of Chaz's name.
The irradiated mealworms on Fox News' morning gab show Fox & Friends were talking about that free-falling satellite today and in doing so exposed a sad insecurity. They think we wish them ill!
President Obama introduced the American Jobs Act yesterday at the White House, clutching a print-out bound by a paper (or binder, fine) clip. Can you even believe that he would use a clip like that? What a jerk. Wait, what?
Gilded dildo casket Donald Trump sure was peeved during his weekly call into Fox News' illiterate dementia variety hour, Fox & Friends, today. Muammar Qaddafi, he's no good, sure, but why do the people of Libya now get to manage all of that sweet untapped brent crude under the sands of their own country? Can't NATO,…
The human buoys over at Fox News' morning brain drain Fox & Friends were doing a little of this earlier today and discussing an educational video shown to kids by the Department of Education in which beloved character SpongeBob Squarepants learns about human-made global warming.
