Fried Squirrel Cuts Power to 2,000 in Silicon Valley
An electric company spokesperson says a squirrel was responsible for an outage that took out power for nearly 2,000 Cupertino, California residents on Saturday.
Penn State Junior Dresses Up, Whispers With Squirrel Named "Sneezy"
Penn State junior Mary Krupa is, according to her peers and WJAC-TV, the "Squirrel Whisperer." Over the course of her college career, she's developed a deep and lasting relationship with Sneezy the Squirrel, who seems to not mind the fact that Krupa likes to dress her up and take pictures of her. Sneezy is chill.…
Greased Pole Confounds Hungry Squirrel In Search of Bird Food
To deal with a meddlesome squirrel stealing seed from his garden’s bird feeder, the wife of YouTube user Robert Krampf slathered Vaseline on the pole supporting the feeder. The result: A squirrel’s profound existential crisis.
Woman Accused of Stabbing Beerless Man With Ceramic Squirrel
A South Carolina woman was arrested Wednesday for stabbing her common-law husband in the chest with a ceramic squirrel. His offense? Returning home without beer on Christmas Eve.
Tippy the Fainting Squirrel Has Had One Too Many Nut Cocktails
He's been dubbed "Tippy the Fainting Squirrel" for fairly obvious reasons: This foraging black squirrel just can't seem to stay upright for more than a few seconds.
Tennessee Cop Fired After Shooting, Pepper Spraying Squirrel in Store
A police officer lost his job after a bloody confrontation with a squirrel at the Dollar General store in Mountain City, Tennessee last month.
Yale in Uproar Over Missing Campus Squirrels
A distressed Yale senior emails Gawker:
This Is Quite Possibly the Most Florida News Story Ever Written
Not even The Onion could make up a more Florida story than the real-life misadventures of one William Daniel Lloyd, AKA Florida Man.
Crazy Cat People Have Nothing on Crazy Squirrel People
Kelly Foxton estimates that she has spent over half a million dollars taking care of and, most importantly, dressing her squirrel Sugar Bush in various insane outfits that include gowns and faux furs. (You probably saw pictures of Sugar Bush — or one of the 5 squirrels named Sugar Bush that Foxton has owned over the…
Drunk Guy Goes For Drive With Pet Squirrel, Blames Subsequent DUI on Squirrel
Luckily the local news was there to interview the drunk guy (and the squirrel). According to police reports, the squirrel was "eating him." According to Drunk Guy's girlfriend, the squirrel wasn't "eating him; he was just crawling around in his shirt." According to Drunk Guy himself, the squirrel was "just tired"…
Plucky Young Animal Lover Plays with Dead Squirrel Against Her Mom's Wishes, Contracts Bubonic Plague
In a tale that will soon pass into Mom Urban Legend, a 7-year-old girl in Colorado, a 7-year-old girl not so very different from you, in fact, in a Colorado much like your own state, played near a dead squirrel after her mom told her to leave it alone. And do you know what happened to that little girl?
The Woman Who Fed Squirrels Too Much
Annick Richardson not only feeds peanuts to the squirrels who frolic about on her yard, but also allegedly enters her neighbors' properties to feed their squirrels as well. This is how she ended up being charged with two counts of criminal trespassing.
If You Don't Want a Personal Jet Pack Then You're Dumb
Gravity existence! Personal jetpacks! Squirrel love! Treadmill shrimp! Lion theories! Worm brains! Dwarf stars! Futuristic pots! And x-ray food from the very near future! It's your Monday Science Watch, where we watch science—without any fancy science degrees!
Meet the Bizarre Scientology Stalking Squad
What happens if you leave the official Church of Scientology, but remain an independent, practicing Scientologist? As apostate Marty Rathbun learned the other day, a group of bearded men with cameras attached to their heads stalks you. Seriously.
Cop Horrifies Middle School Children by Torturing Baby Squirrel
A cop in Mesquite, Texas, decided to pepper spray a baby squirrel at a middle school while horrified children and teachers looked on. He keeps on going even though they plead with him to stop. Now that the cop has been caught on film, let's hope PETA or some other animal rights group comes calling. Just when you…
Greenwich Village Squirrel Massacre Divides Community
A Daily News report on squirrels being massacred by one woman's dogs has some people heated, and undercover Parks Enforcement officers are issuing tickets for unleashed dogs. Hopefully they'll start busting people for not picking up their dog's crap, too.
The End of History Ale: The World's Strongest Beer Comes Inside a Dead Squirrel
British brewery BrewDog is producing a $750 beer called "The End of History Ale." At 55 per cent volume, it's stronger than whiskey or vodka. Also, all the bottles are placed inside dead animals.
Squirrel is Flummoxed by Peanut Tied to a String
Every squirrel fisherman knows that the best squirrel fishing technique is to tie a peanut on a string. Alas, they won't be making any squirrel burgers tonight, as this very determined squirrel is hungry and up to the challenge.
God Damn Squirrels
One squirrel gets in some tourist picture and now it's squirrels in TV ads, forever.
At Long Last, 'The Squirrelizer' has Arrived
Surely you've heard about the squirrel that photo-bombed a Minnesota couple's timed shot on a Canadian lake? The whole world's gone mad over it! Well now you can have your own photos squirrelized by "that squirrel" as well! [The Squirrelizer]
