Lifetime, the TV network that "celebrates, entertains, and supports women," has finally pushed its schadenfreude reality programming too far. After airing an extraordinarily child-sexualizing episode of Dance Moms once, the network pulled the episode from rotation and scrubbed it from the internet. The episode in…

"Girl, 7, Gets £7,000 Liposuction Voucher for Christmas from ‘Human Barbie' Mum," The Daily Mail reports.

Liv Tyler's mother Bebe Buell gave an interview to America's trashiest magazine Steppin' Out, and the result is a bizarre portrait of the conflicted mind of a momager and old school fameball.

A year after Simon Cowell abandoned ship on American Idol to produce an American version of his other popular televised singing competition, he returned to Fox tonight—and reunited with a no-doubt hysterical Paula Abdul—as The X Factor made its stateside debut.

An Australian mother is pitching a fit because her daughter won "Best Personality" at a children's beauty pageant, which is evidence of anti-meritocratic judgment, she says, because her daughter's personality sucks. The Herald-Sun reports,

Botox Mom Kerry Campbell (who might not be "Kerry Campbell" at all, but a multi-named mystery chupacabra of indeterminate origin) has returned to The Sun, the publication where her insanity spree began, to apologize for shooting botulism into her 8-year-old daughter's face, then bragging about it on TV.

I hate to be the one to tell you this — and on Mother's Day, of all days! — but your mom might be part of a syndicate of hardened thieves who steal credit cards and cash from distracted shoppers.

Like a vulture circling a mound of rotting flesh, Lindsay Lohan is closing in on the role of Victoria Gotti in an upcoming mafia movie. To seal the deal, Lindsay and Victoria posed for pictures; the result was like one of those fairy tales where a damsel looks in the mirror and freaks out when she sees what she will…

On Kourtney and Kim Take New York, Kim agrees to support Scott at his event until her mom/manager tells her it's a bad idea to be seen promoting another product. When Kim goes anyway, her mom confronts her.

When television celebrities collide! Did you know that Kris Jenner (mother of all Kardashians) and Kathie Lee Gifford have been best friends for 35 years? Well, now you do.

"Sometimes just raw energy and intelligence wins out." This man, an entertainment executive, is talking about Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates. But he is also specifically talking about the Kardashians. [Jezebel]

"My fantasy is to have Keeping Up With Kardashians, Season 26. Who knew it would be this profitable? I should have had more kids." —Kris Jenner to The Hollywood Reporter, on her family's $65M income and fear of "overexposure."

Dina Lohan gave the Today Show an exclusive interview this morning. Lindsay's mother went on to defend previous statements she had made about her daughter. She also discussed the star's current treatment.

Greg Kelly of Good Day New York asks Kris Jenner the question on everyone's minds: which of her daughters does she love the most? Check the clip to see her sly answer.

Miley's eighteenth birthday party features bumping and grinding with her mom. Jay-Z shot his brother at age 12. Charlie Sheen's hooker gives an interview. Lenny Dykstra's dog could get repossessed. Just another manic Monday gossip roundup.

Britney doesn't want her kids to be famous. A Real Housewife leaves a stroller unattended and two kids nearly die in a swimming pool. Heidi Montag's mom is "mourning the loss of a child." Wednesday gossip has maternal anxieties.

After the world collectively shrieked with horror at two-year-old smoking baby Ardi Rizal, the parents of this three-year-old Chinese tot thought to themselves, "Hey, we've got a smoking baby. Ours is a boozehound, too." Self-destructing babies: Your ticket to fame.