Gawker
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finally
Nate Silver Moves On to the Real Issues
Politiconumerical nerd-guru Nate Silver is totally in the tank for Peet's Coffee, and uses his statistical wizardry to imply it's better than Starbucks. But is it better than McCafé? This marketing crap is your future, Nate Silver. Drink up.
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30
Comment by dado: I'm quite certain my life was better before I knew what a macchiato was. 6 Responses | Other threads
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Yuppie Wars
McDonald's Sucks Starbucks' Lifeblood
McDonald's is trying to take advantage of the recession to crush Starbucks by flooding America with cheap, faux-fancy McCafé coffeé. Despité the nation's most annoyingé ad campaigné, McD's is winning the battle for the (formerly) yuppié soul: More »
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Comment by Stacy Davis: I've had three friends laid off from Starbucks in the last couple months. In Seattle they are a major employer,... 7 Responses | Other threads
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corporate america
Starbucks Robot Martian Commenter Approves
Why did Starbucks decide to sponsor MSNBC's Morning Joe? To "promote its ethical commitments." Whatever that bullshit means. One human-like online Starbucks advocate supports them strongly!: More »
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Comment by Fry_Bread_Power: I hate it when doctors order healthy interaction with other people. 2 Responses | Other threads
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Media Crack
If Newspapers Die, It Won't Be Because of Donald Trump's Lackeys
In your merry Monday media column: Hearst Magazines is not dying quite so quickly as others (news!), the New York Times wants more of your money, a thing happens at 'Morning Joe,' Sun-Times people invite Bill Rancic to suck it, and more: More »
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Comment by naugahydeinplainsight: Morning Joe, brewed by Starbucks? Coming soon on MSNBC: The Timex Countdown Hour. Hardball, courtesy of Major League Baseball. more » | Other threads
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class war
Mad Bomber Tries to Make It As Clear As Possible: Die, Yuppie Scum
The rhetoric is over. The violence has begun! A bomber is on the loose! New York City has been struck by its fourth explosion in as many years, a slow reign of anarchist terror as the yuppies slumber. The message: "Bourgeoisie, repent or die." Or maybe: "We are bored teenagers." More »
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Comment by Mama Penguino: Why is no one looking at Dr. Evil and Mr. Bigglesworth? 2 Responses | Other threads
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advertising
McD's, Starbucks, and the Battle for the Yuppie Soul
Are you overwhelmed today by the sheer force of the $100 million "marketing blitz" for McDonald's McCafé, the "mother of all campaigns" that's "impossible to escape"? Dié Starbucks! Drink McDonald's Coffeé Or Elsé! More »
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Comment by Private Hangnail: Could the recently impoverished Starbucks client bring a gently used Venti cup to McDonald's and request a McLatté be extruded... 6 Responses | Other threads
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Sad NYC
Starbucks Releases Its Death Grip
For as long as mankind has occupied New York, there have been two Starbucks locations on Astor Place, a block away from each other, which occasioned many predictable remarks. No more! This means everything.
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Comment by misslinda: Don't get yourself into a caffeine withdrawal tizzy, this has nothing to do with Starbucks shutting down stores. The 'buckys... 17 Responses | Other threads
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Media Crack
Getty Wants its Money Back, Freelancers
In your crazyland Tuesday media column: PR wizardry at the bankrupt Philly papers, Starbucks sliding down the publishing D-list, the perils of journalism in Utah, and Getty says you owe it money: More »
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Comment by DahlELama: Wow--dick move, Getty. Don't you pay people to get this sort of information right? Maybe you should use those salaries... 1 Responses | Other threads
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marketing
Anna Wintour Types Sought By McDonald's Coffee Division
McDonald's is providing the "official coffee" of New York Fashion Week in a bid to boost its image among fashionistas. Fat chance. But it will probably do something to Fashion Week's image. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by KristaJulieva: Thing is, it's not like Starbucks is this elitist brand. Any common bastard in Peoria can drive five minutes... 11 Responses | Other threads
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liberals
The Smuggest Thing That Has Ever Happened
Barack Obama's inauguration will be a blessed, historic event. Also, a catalyst for liberal self-caricature, starting with $4 latte-sippers watching the ceremonies in coastal Starbucks cafes. On which network? More »
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By Ryan TateComment by yourfriendandneighbor: Actually, I think middle America is where you can still afford an expensive coffee. The recession hasn't hit there yet. 10 Responses | Other threads
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starbucks
You Can't Even Get A Starbucks Job Anymore
Poor Starbucks is barely making any money. The coffee chain's profit dropped 97% in the fourth quarter, because it's spending so much money closing down all the stores it opened earlier, when they thought every block in the world needed a Starbucks. At least they're good at giving away coffee for free! Hey, remember when Starbucks was the emergency backup job of the creative underclass, where you could make some scratch and get health care as a starving artist? Now it's aspirational. The emergency backup job is burglary. [AP]
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Comment by zapfdingbatme: Starbucks and Wal-Mart seem to work on a similar business model for their respective markets. Could Wal-Mart be far behind?... 5 Responses | Other threads
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starbucks
Starbucks Also Wins Election
Starbucks may be awful at traditional advertising but the company seems to be just ingenious at tricky guerilla marketing campaigns. Witness its big election-day coffee giveaway: It was a massive PR victory for the company. Starbucks spent maybe $350,000 on a single ad during Saturday Night Live, then kicked back and watched as the Wall Street Journal, CNBC, Newsweek etc. gave the promotion tons of free press. And the cost of the coffee? Oh that's the best part: It was practically free! Reports Ad Age: More »
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By Ryan TateComment by ronniedobbs: I think Starbucks should really consider segregating its customers: 1 line for the actual coffee drinkers; another for the "skinny... 10 Responses | Other threads
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marketing
You can thank us later, slackers, felons, children and so forth. [Starbucks]
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crime
Hippie Corporations in Illegal Gifts-for-Votes Scam
Tomorrow is Election Day, the famous American Holiday in which people are not given a day off of work but are still expected to wait in lengthy lines outside elementary schools during business hours in order to have their provisional ballots thrown away or watch their electronic voting machines helpfully select the Constitution Party candidate. Yes, voting is hard, and seldom worth it. Which is why civic-minded companies are giving people prizes for voting! A voter an receive a free cup of coffee from Starbucks, a free donut from Krispy Kreme, and free ice cream from Ben & Jerry's if they show up and tell them they voted. It's a great, fun way to boost turnout, and it's probably totally illegal! More »
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By PareeneComment by JulesNoctambule: I wish someone was giving away free liquor. The ice cream and the doughnut will help, but my nerves are... 8 Responses | Other threads
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starbucks
Starbucks Hated By Its Own Ad Agency
Last week Starbucks' ad agency, Wieden & Kennedy, quit the Starbucks account. As you can imagine, it's pretty fucking rare for something like that to happen, especially with a company of that scale. At the time, the agency just mumbled something about how it was "time to move on." But now the truth has come out: Starbucks is a notorious headache. Thanks largely to "mercurial" CEO Howard Schultz. More »
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Comment by CaptainFantastic: Doesn't everybody hate their clients? 9 Responses | Other threads
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coffee
Will Broke Americans Turn To Cheap Coffee?
Could the current US economic meltdown destroy expensive coffee shops, as penniless consumers abandon Starbucks in order to huddle in unheated apartments brewing cheap coffee filtered through a sock? Folgers sure hopes so! The middlebrow coffee roaster is about to debut a big new ad campaign, hoping that now that your retirement fund has evaporated, you'll be interested in a lower-cost coffee experience. And hold onto your threadbare hats, newly poor caffeine addicts: Folgers has just made the "biggest innovation since the launch of decaf": More »
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Comment by Monkeyrash: I like my coffee to match my attitude - dark and bitter. 7 Responses | Other threads
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retail
Downtown San Francisco no longer capable of supporting three Starbucks per intersection
Next year's Macworld may be the last chance to make a shamefaced Starbucks run to the mall-kiosk latte dispenser in the Metreon. Why did the Seattle coffee monoculturist give six months' notice of that coffee-bar's closure, and 599 others? Why, to retrain loyalists on other locations within footsteps. We already know that you drink only at establishments where the coffee pickers are unionized, graduate-degreed, and constantly hugged. And so do we. But here's our map of the remaining South of Market Starbucks — and all the Blue Bottle locations — anyway. Only to show to your sleep-addled board members when they visit for a meeting. More »
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Comment by Web2PointOhShit: You missed the uber seekrit Blue Bottle on Ritch St, between Townsend and Bryant. You seem to infer SoMa... more » | Other threads
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advertising
There Is No Issue More Important
Tim Horton's, a coffee chain that caters to the Canadian Menace, is kicking Starbucks' ass on Facebook. There is a group called "Biodegradable Cups at Tim Hortons" with more than 10,000 members. This means that Starbucks could use some of T.H.'s online marketing savvy. And, that Canadians are suicidally bored. [Ad Age]
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Comment by Gosukusan: @jfk1624: Ha the lead singer of the Barenaked Ladies was busted for drugs today in upstate NY! more » | Other threads
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google
Street View finally coming to Seattle
The Google Street View car was Spotted in Microsoft Country last week after launching in many smaller markets around the country first. Apparently the drivers, rather than use some fancy, newfangled Internet doohickey, simply burn the data captured by the rooftop camera array onto a CD and mail it back to Mountain View. The fact that Portland, Oregon and Juneau, Alaska were added to the list of Street View cities before Seattle inspired an April Fools article in local publication Naked Loon quoting a fictional Google spokesmonkey as saying the addition of Seattle was "extremely unlikely, save for some kind of highly localized disaster centered somewhere in Redmond." More »
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By Jackson WestComment by CosmoGolem: This is really creepy technology. I wonder when we'll see people through the walls of their homes! My 85-year-old... more » | Other threads
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the rich
Class Warfare Over Starbucks Seats
Starbucks just unveiled a special rewards program, offering free refills and wireless internet for its most loyal addicts. But this isn't enough for Times columnist Ron Lieber, who considers himself a very special, lucrative customer and who has a list of demands. He would like his own special, shorter lines and a special VIP seating section with Aeron chairs and reserved electrical outlets. He would like to be invited to exclusive parties. And everyone else would like his head on a platter. Again. More » -
wi-fi
Starbucks' desperation means free Internet for card customers
With the purchase of a $5 gift card, or by entering your personal information in the company's database for a rewards program, Starbucks will allow you to sip on two hours of free Wi-Fi from AT&T at stores. The Seattle-based fast food chain may be one of the first to be hit by any economic downturn as Americans cut back on the affordable luxury of $4 caffeinated drinks and spend that money at competitors like McDonald's. One look at the stock's performance over the last year, down over 30 percent, and you can see why CEO Howard Schultz would look to freebies like Wi-Fi to keep the company's FrappucinoTM junkies coming back. As our very special correspondent once put it, "Wi-Fi isn't a luxury or even a commodity. It's a condiment."
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By Jackson WestComment by raincoaster: @sample032: Did we not have this discussion already, right here on Valleywag? And did I not predict this? It's coming, people:... more » | Other threads
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scandal
Starbucks Barista Once Tried to Fatten Up the Olsen Twins
Ha! A former barista for the small coffee shop chain Starbucks has come forward and admitted to switching whole milk for skim when making caffeine cocktails for the Olsen twins. Mary Kate and Ashley have been frequent and loyal customers of the humble little java huts over the years, and have also (well, especially Mary Kate) been involved in various "so skinny!" grumblings. "The barista thought the Olsens were too thin, so whenever they ordered their usual drink, he would replace the skim milk with full-fat," said a source. What a nefarious, strangely philanthropic plot.
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Comment by swagv: Thanks. I can sleep at night now, knowing that this important issue has been settled. more » | Other threads
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corporate america
Saving Starbucks Through Micromanagement
Howard Schultz, the founder of Death Star coffee chain and religious icon Starbucks, built the company up from nothing with pure grit, energy, and a visionary outlook. Then he went too far, aiming to open 40-freaking-thousand stores (more than McDonald's), and the company's stock price cratered over the past year. Schultz brought himself back as CEO earlier this year, and the dynamic caffeine pusher has now revealed how he plans to revive his floundering company: by micromanaging the shit out of every god damn thing: More » -
branding
Ethiopia's Problems Solved By New Logo
Ethiopia doesn't have the world's most sterling reputation. Many people think of "famine" and "drought" when the country's name is mentioned. But the Ethiopians are lucky, in the sense that Starbucks has forged a connection between the parched and war-torn nation in northern Africa and yuppie coffee swillers across America who just adore the subtle fruity undertones of the Ethiopian Yirgacheffe blend. So the country went to a branding firm to come up with a logo to stick on all of its coffee, to make people think of it as more of a luxury item. The logo is pictured. It looks like it should be in lime green on the side of can of a new and exotic type of energy drink. Instead, it's on the oldest energy drink ever. The kind that comes from Ethiopia (and is not qat)! We wish the country well in its yuppie-swindling mission, but we would have gone with a logo that's a little more cutting edge, with both hipster appeal and a strong connection to Ethiopian history. Like this: More »
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Comment by raincoaster: I was working in Starbucks when some hipster-dweeb thought he'd go apeshit on us and started lecturing us about our... more » | Other threads
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energy
Starbucks Shovels More Stimulants Into Caffeine-Addled Masses
It's about time that Starbucks offered weary consumers a little energy with their oversized caffeinated beverages. The coffee chain and infectious disease spreader is now providing the option of a "+Energy" addition to any drink. The new energy formula contains B-vitamins, guarana, and ginseng, which is the same mixture that they toss in most canned energy drinks these days, along with eye-popping amounts of caffeine. What I would like to know is this: what one flavor could possibly taste palatable mixed with every single thing that Starbucks sells, from coffee to tea to fruit-flavored goop? More »
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Comment by famousauthor: Pumpkin macchiato with meth might be a good pick-me-up for the last part of the work day. more » | Other threads
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boycotts
Slutty Starbucks Logo Offends Crazies
"The Resistance," which describes itself as a "Christian Group" but, judging by its website, is more of a "Wacko Conspiracy Theory Group," has just launched a boycott of Starbucks. They object to the coffee chain's new retro-style logo, which features a mermaid who wantonly possesses boobies. They "might as well call themselves Slutbucks"! In the past, The Resistance has lobbied celebrities like Paris Hilton and Tom Cruise to change their "ridiculous" behavior. So their calls for action have clearly been huge failures thus far. The full, weird press release is below. More »
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Comment by mmejanvier: We were discussing this over on barista exchange. (It's like facebook for coffee geeks) And I'll say it again. Icthio-huminoid breasts do... more » | Other threads
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crusades
Starbucks Doesn't Have Any God Damn Lemons
Denver Post columnist Al Lewis is on a crusade. A cranky Starbucks crusade! "How 'bout a slice of lemon to go with that $2.10 iced tea?" he asks, rhetorically. Because there is no lemon! Other places, they give you lemons. But fancy-schmancy Starbucks? No lemons. Don't blame Al Lewis. He's written (multiple) columns! He's sent his concerns all the way up the chain to the CEO! And now he knows why Starbucks' stock has lost half its value in a year: because they can't get Al Lewis a freakin' slice of lemon: More »
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Comment by sayswho: @Freegan: haha shmegma - that made my day. i will take a $1.50 triple xl coffee from donut delite over... more » | Other threads
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security
AT&T turns off free Wi-Fi
AT&T meant to make Wi-Fi free only for iPhone users. But a hack made it free for laptop users at Starbucks and other network points controlled by AT&T. The free Wi-Fi has now been disabled. Guess the hoi polloi stealing bandwidth ruined it for iPhone owners. [Gizmodo] -
wi-fi
Get free Wi-Fi at Starbucks with or without an iPhone from AT&T
AT&T is offering iPhone owners free Wi-Fi at hotspots managed by the company, including those at megachain Starbucks. But all the system checks is the user-agent string supplied by the iPhone's Safari browser and a phone number from a working iPhone. So anyone with a laptop can simply change their browser's user-agent string, put in the phone number of a friend with an iPhone, et voila! Free Wi-Fi. Why you won't get? The phone number of the cute barista you've been flirting with in vain. (Via Slashdot, photo by Synthesis Studios)
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By Jackson WestComment by raincoaster: Sooner or later, there will be free wi-fi at all Starbucks. They're about the only place in Vancouver that still... more » | Other threads
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marketing
Starbucks Reaches Out To The Simple People
Are you the type of consumer who's always been interested in trying that "Starbucks" that you've heard so much about, but are intimidated by its mysterious ways? In other words, are you a half-bright mole person? Well the company has a new website just for you! "What the online experience does is mimic the experience [consumers] would have in the store, if they went to the barista and said, 'I want to try Starbucks, but I don't know where to start,'" says one exec [Ad Age]. With StarbucksCoffeeAtHome.com, all the frightening guesswork is taken out of the coffee-going experience. What's your "flavor profile?" More »
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Comment by whitjm5: @Isabelle15: Shoulda punched her. Ppl like that need to remember that the world does not revolve around them and... more » | Other threads
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starbucks
Wait, Why Did We Buy A Record Company, Again?
"Starbucks also said it would turn over management control of Hear Music, its in-house record label, to its partner in that venture, the Concord Music Group... As part of the changes, Starbucks said Ken Lombard, president of the entertainment unit since 2004, had departed... The chairman and chief executive, Howard Schultz... said the company was 'committed to examining all aspects of our business that are not directly related to our core.'" [Times]
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By Ryan TateComment by famousauthor: I suppose they will now be dispensing with the coffee business so they can concentrate on manufacturing brown napkins. more » | Other threads
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earnings
Starbucks quarterly results spill scalds analysts's laps
Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz dampened analyst expectations for the company's performance ahead of its April 30 quarterly earnings anouncement, sending shares tumbling 10.4 percent in after-hours trading. "The current economic environment is the weakest in our company's history," he said to explain why the company is facing the first quarterly profit decline in eight years. The retailer has long traded on being a relatively affordable yuppie status symbol, serving up a dose of psychological salve for four dollars a cup to an American middle class in decline. But it looks like Schultz's stunt to bloster the elite cachet of a brand now as ubiquitously plebeian as your local McDonald's might not be enough to fuel continued growth. (Photo by Peter Kaminski) More »
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By Jackson WestComment by raincoaster: @Rachel Marsden: I'm not a man, but I don't hesitate to tell them to put their sticks away if I'm... more » | Other threads
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bad ideas
Starbucks Has Ways Of Making You Talk
Despair is in order for those of you who balance out your vague sense of revulsion at visiting corporate Death Star and coffee shop Starbucks by telling yourself, "Well, at least I don't have to talk to anybody there." The company is now seriously considering promoting conversation in its stores. And the sunny, terrible people who frequent the Starbucks public suggestion factory, MyStarbucksIdea.com, think it's a "great idea!" More »
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Comment by amxeh: I'm a barista at Starbucks; I'm always quite 'chatty' to our customers, especially with the good looking lads and the... more » | Other threads
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coffee
Starbucks' Ugly Brown Cups Give McDonald's The Opening It Needs
What exactly is Starbucks doing? They came out with their revolutionary, game-changing, not quite as burnt new house coffee last week, which pairs well with chocolate marble loaf. But along with the new $11,000 machines to make said coffee, the Death Star-like chain has introduced new coffee cups, and they're... brown? Was the design consultant who knows how to appeal to yuppies sick the day that decision was made? And now the company has bigger problems: McDonald's is determined to kick Starbucks' ass right where it lives. In Seattle! More »
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Comment by javysan: @saltwatertaffy: I thought I recognized that mic. My favorite spot is El Triangulo on the intersecting corner of 47th Ave. &... more » | Other threads
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In Brief
For Some Reason This Made Me Laugh Harder Than Anything Else Today
A straight-faced blog comment about the hotly anticipated new flavor of swill that Starbucks just started selling: "Went in early to my favorite Starbucks this morning so that I could get my favorite seat and people-watch. Settled in with my 9-minute old Pike Place Roast and a piece of the new chocolate marble loaf—a fabulos pairing, so good that I did not have any cream in my first cup, the sweetnes of the chocolate marble loaf brought out the chocolate tones in the Pike Place Roast."
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Comment by City_Dater: @TheHonJudgeSmails: No question this is the work of a dipshit; however, I bet the dipshit is being paid by Starbucks to... 1 Responses | Other threads
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coffeehouse politics
Starbucks won't "laissez faire" — even on its gift cards
Starbucks will let you create your own customized Starbucks gift card with anything you want stamped on it. Well, almost anything. When Roger Ream tried to get "Laissez Faire" printed on his Starbucks card, it was rejected. Starbucks says "we review each Card before printing ... but we can't honor every" request. Starbucks policy considers "overtly political statements" inappropriate. The Wall Street Journal discovered that "People Not Profits" and "Yes We Can" both sailed through just fine. For a company that's fighting in court against paying back tips to its employees, I'd think Starbucks would embrace "laissez faire" wholeheartedly.
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Comment by giftcardblogger: Very funny. What is political is in the eye of the decision maker. more » | Other threads
starbucks
New York, 1:49 AM
Fri Jul 10
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