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New York, 2:17 AM
Tue Nov 24
47 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #studies more →

    Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii

    Catholic Dude Jealous of Sexy Study

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of RaptorAvatar RaptorAvatar
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    Unfortunately, carrying a water bottle everywhere like some kind of tumorized keychain makes me look like too much of a dork to attract a mate anyways. (Or it's, you know, one of like 20 dorky things that contribute to this). #erections
     Reply
    RaptorAvatar was starred RaptorAvatar was unstarred
    Image of Jes St.Lawrence Jes St.Lawrence
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    Right. Like the world needs THAT GUY to have priapism. The stuff of your dreams, right girls?

    And by dreams I mean the kind of nightmares that make you jump up and turn on all the lights and check behind shower curtains. #erections
     Reply
    Jes St.Lawrence was starred Jes St.Lawrence was unstarred
    Image of Richard Petty Bourgeoisie Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    If you wanna take away my BPA-laced drinking container, you'll have to pry it off my cold, flaccid penis!!!
     Reply
    Edited by Richard Petty Bourgeoisie at 11/11/09 1:03 PM Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was starred Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was unstarred
    Image of bytememehard bytememehard
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    My dog is healthy as an ox, gets an erection at the drop of a pheromone, and drinks water straight from the toilet. I'm going to start following his lead. #erections
     Reply
    bytememehard was starred bytememehard was unstarred
    Image of morninggloria morninggloria
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    Maybe their robust erections are what allowed them to get rich enough to afford fancy schmancy water bottles in the first place. #erections
     Reply
    morninggloria was starred morninggloria was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    But some of them are so frail from ingesting soybeans and re-purified air. How can they all be schlong-hounds? It looks like it takes a mighty effort to walk down those flights of stairs in their apartment walk-ups just to recycle plastic, walk to the Food Co-op, or plant seedlings in the community garden. I'd hardly think they'd have the energy to woo the ladeeez or whomever with their unwieldy sausage rolls.
     Reply
    Edited by Spirit Fingers at 11/11/09 12:30 PM Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of senatormayer senatormayer
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    So I should drink bottled water to get unstuck from this damned gloryhole? #erections
     Reply
    senatormayer was starred senatormayer was unstarred
    Image of Beau Nerd Beau Nerd
    11/11/09

    @senatormayer: You could do that. You could also just ask the individual(s) on the other end to kindly "let go." #erections
     Reply
    Beau Nerd was starred Beau Nerd was unstarred
    Image of i'm a bottle i'm a bottle
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    Hamilton, I were your Latin teacher, you'd have recieved a sharp slap on your wrist with a ruler for declining a singular masculine i-declension noun in the nominative case according to the second declension. Now run along and go practice all your passive conjugations.
     Reply
    Edited by i'm a bottle at 11/11/09 12:17 PM i'm a bottle was starred i'm a bottle was unstarred
    Image of Richard Petty Bourgeoisie Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: Somehow, that comment just cured my ED. #erections
     Reply
    Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was starred Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    11/11/09

    @Richard Petty Bourgeoisie: @i'm a bottle: Seriously, I am so turned on right now. How do you say "Standard Hotel" in Latin? #erections
     Reply
    Richard Petty Bourgeoisie promoted this comment AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of Richard Petty Bourgeoisie Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
    11/11/09

    @AzureTexan: "Lorenzo Lamas" believe it or not. #erections
     Reply
    Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was starred Richard Petty Bourgeoisie was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    11/11/09

    @Richard Petty Bourgeoisie: Strange. Someone else told me it was "Ricardo Montalban." #erections
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of i'm a bottle i'm a bottle
    11/11/09

    @AzureTexan: Khaaaaan! Khaaaaan! #erections
     Reply
    i'm a bottle was starred i'm a bottle was unstarred
    Image of iplaudius iplaudius
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: This is all covered in my new book about self-loathing homosexual grammarians: Declining Penis: Crises of the Testes. #erections
     Reply
    iplaudius was starred iplaudius was unstarred
    Image of AzureTexan AzureTexan
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: Ah, but now he's living out eternity in Regula 1, newly upholstered in rich Corinthian leather. #erections
     Reply
    AzureTexan was starred AzureTexan was unstarred
    Image of disinterested 3rd party disinterested 3rd party
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: Not to mention the ability to repeat the same motion 5,000 times in a row without tiring. Swam 3000 meters this morning.... #erections
     Reply
    i'm a bottle promoted this comment disinterested 3rd party was starred disinterested 3rd party was unstarred
    Image of disinterested 3rd party disinterested 3rd party
    11/11/09

    @disinterested 3rd party: Sorry meant to reply to your other post. Although I did have three years of high school Latin. Sadly all I can tell you is that Gaul is divided into three parts..... #erections
     Reply
    i'm a bottle promoted this comment disinterested 3rd party was starred disinterested 3rd party was unstarred
    Image of i'm a bottle i'm a bottle
    11/11/09

    @iplaudius: Yes, some of your major theses were also name checked in the seminal work on feminine homosexuality and Latin grammar: Conjugating Vaginae: The Dilemma of the Supine.
     Reply
    Edited by i'm a bottle at 11/11/09 1:34 PM i'm a bottle was starred i'm a bottle was unstarred
    Image of Jes St.Lawrence Jes St.Lawrence
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: "Hamilton, I were your Latin teacher, you'd have recieved"

    Thank Bog you're not my English teacher. #erections
     Reply
    Jes St.Lawrence was starred Jes St.Lawrence was unstarred
    Image of i'm a bottle i'm a bottle
    11/11/09

    @Jes St.Lawrence: Hehe, "i" before "e" except after "c."
     Reply
    Edited by i'm a bottle at 11/11/09 1:43 PM i'm a bottle was starred i'm a bottle was unstarred
    Image of iplaudius iplaudius
    11/11/09

    @i'm a bottle: Ha, genius. #erections
     Reply
    iplaudius was starred iplaudius was unstarred
    Image of i'm a bottle i'm a bottle
    11/11/09

    @iplaudius: That was a fun thread. #erections
     Reply
    i'm a bottle was starred i'm a bottle was unstarred
    Image of manchops manchops
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    somebody please forward a link to this to the producer of Levi's photo shoot.

    Like, now? #erections
     Reply
    manchops was starred manchops was unstarred
    Image of iplaudius iplaudius
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    This would explain why the REI in Chelsea is a 24/7 bathhouse. #erections
     Reply
    iplaudius was starred iplaudius was unstarred
    Image of DennyCrane DennyCrane
    11/11/09

    In reply to Dudes With Fancy Water Bottles Have the Hardest Penii
    Note To Self:
    Buy fancy non-BPA water bottles.
    Also, grow beard and drop 25 pounds.     #erections
     Reply
    DennyCrane was starred DennyCrane was unstarred
    Image of Nuckin Futz for you Nuckin Futz for you
    11/10/09

    In reply to Catholic Dude Jealous of Sexy Study
    Do studies really do that?

    No, the scarcity of college men who have a clue in hell what they are doing down there encourages that. Once they get over the porno way of thinking smacking a chick in face with their members is foreplay and get some schooling on how to get things warmed up down there I'm sure the girls would happily drop their solo sessions. #sexytime
     Reply
    Nuckin Futz for you was starred Nuckin Futz for you was unstarred
    Image of heartbreakturnip heartbreakturnip
    11/10/09

    @Nuckin Futz for you: Good post, but you have violated the moratorium on the word "members." Please make a note of it. #sexytime
     Reply
    heartbreakturnip was starred heartbreakturnip was unstarred
    Image of ShanghaiLil ShanghaiLil
    11/10/09

    In reply to Catholic Dude Jealous of Sexy Study
    Because without encouragement, college students wouldn't play with themselves. At all. They'd just go to classes and learn to be industrial engineers or nuclear scientists or something. #sexytime
     Reply
    ShanghaiLil was starred ShanghaiLil was unstarred
    Image of Magister Magister
    11/10/09

    In reply to Catholic Dude Jealous of Sexy Study
    Just twenty or so years ago, a prosecutor a handful of exits north of Duke reached across county lines to go after Adam & Eve, a sex aid distributer near Chapel Hill. And now, two short decades later, their products are part of a widely-publicized, legitimate scientific study in the "City of Medicine".

    Times they are a-changing. #sexytime
     Reply
    Magister was starred Magister was unstarred
    Image of God God
    11/10/09

    In reply to Catholic Dude Jealous of Sexy Study
    The only things worse than young men sitting around and masturbating is women of any age sitting around and masturbating. Thank Me for small mercies, kids: masturbation can only be accomplished as long as the sinner is "sitting around". Standing, lying down, lounging and squatting are not at all conducive for a good masturbate. Every time Satan hears the sinister hum of a vibrator, a demon gets his horns. Oh also please keep in mind that a woman's satisfied moans can sometimes cause famine in Ethiopia. Dangerous thing, the female vulva. That's why Satan made it. Be afraid, my children, be very afraid.

    If you can read this, you've not been masturbating. #sexytime
     Reply
    God was starred God was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    11/10/09

    @God: But Lord, what about when a woman rubs one out and it's so amazing that she yells Your holy name, as in, "Oh. My. God!" Or is that only a mitzvah if the husband does it for her? #sexytime
     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of God God
    11/10/09

    @BookishLookish: Oh. My. Me. This is all sorts of wrong, dear daughter. Never whisk the batter if you don't intend to put a bun in the old oven. Because I care, I give you a simple rule of thumb: if it's fun, you're enabling famine in Ethiopia. #sexytime
     Reply
    God was starred God was unstarred
    Image of Cogito Ergo Bibo Cogito Ergo Bibo
    11/10/09

    @God: So does this mean that every time I masterbate, a kitten doesn't die?

    The internet. It always lies. #sexytime
     Reply
    Cogito Ergo Bibo was starred Cogito Ergo Bibo was unstarred
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