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Jeff Zucker's Great Escapes
So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Short, Crazy Model Triumphs
Operation Running Watters Has Concluded
A Present, For Us?
Someone Wrote a Play About Jonathan Safran Foer!
Vanity Fair Will Not Make You, But Will Break You

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Clare
10/12/09

In reply to Jeff Zucker's Great Escapes
Where does the Natalie Portman rap (0:34) fit into this timeline?
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unclevanya
10/12/09

@Clare: Nowhere. Lorne Michaels is a universe unto himself. (Classic bit!)
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Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
10/12/09

In reply to Jeff Zucker's Great Escapes
So, is Zucker a douchebag who sucks at his job or a nice guy who sucks at his job? If he's a nice guy, bully for him!
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John Cook
10/12/09

@Richard Petty Bourgeoisie: Jeff Zucker is definitely not a nice guy. But having met with him, I have to say his bravado and arrogance can come off as rather charming, in a dickish older brother kind of way.
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Richard Petty Bourgeoisie
10/12/09

@John Cook: There's something to be said for the "dickish older brother" vibe. Maybe he stays afloat based on the hope that he'll get what's coming to him?
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MattLauerthePharmacist
10/12/09

@Richard Petty Bourgeoisie: I used to work in corporate and met big Z a few times... he's a child working in the costume of an ugly, sad man. He hasn't been fired because he's a great puppet of the GE mafioso and delivers the $$ that they crave, session C after session C (GE Speak). CFO Lynn Calpeter really runs the show and big Z just vomits out the same sad message of his corporate puppet-masters. If you really want to have fun pointing fingers for the NBC spiral, look upwards to Don Immelt.
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Richard Petty Bourgeoisie approved this comment

ThePantaloon.com
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
I smell an Oscar. Nope, my dog just farted. Nevermind.
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DahlELama promoted this comment ThePantaloon.com was starred ThePantaloon.com was unstarred

Elpon
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
I hope it sweeps the Razzies.
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Calraigh promoted this comment Elpon was starred Elpon was unstarred

Conchie Birdie
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
I'd love to know the audience demos for this opening weekend.
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MisterHippity
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Based on his grade for this film and one previous one, I have declared Entertainment Weekly's Owen Gleiberman "The Worst Film Critic of All Time," here: [misterhippity.tumblr.com]
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Edited by MisterHippity at 09/28/09 3:12 PM MisterHippity was starred MisterHippity was unstarred

PimpMyCouch
09/28/09

@MisterHippity: I KNOW! I was so shocked when I read his review. I've been wondering about Owen's competence for a while.
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MisterHippity
09/28/09

@PimpMyCouch: He's a good writer, but sometimes his taste is just ... whacked.
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Limecrete
09/29/09

@MisterHippity: I've learned to subtract two letter grades from any OG review that concerns a movie that includes boobs (didn't he give that piece of shit surfer chick movie an A?), and two letter grades from any LS review of a foreign film. They both have their kryptonite.
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MisterHippity promoted this comment Limecrete was starred Limecrete was unstarred

braak: You are, as usual, completely correct.
09/29/09

@MisterHippity: That's fucking crazy.
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Thistledew
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
My best friend saw it against her will. I asked her for her response and she said "I didn't know it was possible to be completely offended and totally bored at the same time."
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mharker
09/28/09

@Thistledew: Against her will? Sounds like a date-rape of her intelligence.
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Nick Douglas promoted this comment mharker was starred mharker was unstarred

Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
He did order the lobster. (Which means he owes, per the date-rapist recipe.)
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StonedAndDethroned
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
I'm guessing that within three days he'll be in a bell tower clutching a jar of GHB and an automatic weapon screaming, "I'M GONNA DATE RAPE YOU ALL!"
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Edited by StonedAndDethroned at 09/28/09 1:23 PM StonedAndDethroned was starred

RollsRoyceRevenge
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Open Caption for the above picture: "Thank you for the paper towelth to thtuff in my pink undieth."
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louisgreene
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
I'm glad Gawker is able to see this as a negative, because when I look at the numbers I see disappointingly good figures. I suspect it will do very well when it goes into wide release, because I have no faith in people.
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jrhys
09/28/09

@louisgreene: I really wouldn't worry about it, the per screen average sucks:
[www.riskybusinessblog.com]
[johnaugust.com]
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Heywoodjablome
09/28/09

@jrhys: Right! Movies in limited release (small number of screens) should in fact have a higher per screen average than say something released on 3,000 screens. It's basic supply and demand. Typically movies released on few or fewer screens have a significantly higher per screen average, upwards of $8-10K per screen, and even higher. For example, Milk's opening weekend was on 36 screens last Nov, with a per screen average of $40K (i know i know.. clearly this movie is not of the same caliber). The fact that this movie had such a tepid per screen average on opening weekend does not bode well.
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jrhys promoted this comment Heywoodjablome was starred Heywoodjablome was unstarred

jrhys
09/28/09

@Heywoodjablome: Yeah he's screwed. I was just at the IFP where everyone was talking about the hellish state of theatrical distribution right now. Its funny because technically he's doing everything right - he has a preexisting fan base, with presence on twitter, facebook,blog with updates, grassroots screening/ events with tie ins all around the country - but he blames poor showings on the word not being out. Theatrical is REALLY hard right now, but what he left out is that his film sucks. Even his fans hate it: [www.northernstar.info]
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Heywoodjablome
09/29/09

@jrhys: YES - and the distribution company is actually advertising this film on the teevee and in the right places (!), e.g. on Comedy Central which has the same demo as this movie (presumably). So the word is out there, but no one is listening and/or no one cares. (Except apparently those of us on Gawker).
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Edited by Heywoodjablome at 09/29/09 11:09 AM Heywoodjablome was starred Heywoodjablome was unstarred

jrhys
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Tucker Max on his projected gross: "depending on what facts I want to assume, I could make a very good argument for it making anything from 20 million all the way up to 200 million." [www.ihopetheyservebeerinhell.com]
OK I'm stopping now.
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jrhys
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Tucker's strategy in his own words: "Darko was able to independently raise the P&A we needed to distribute the movie ourselves. This is a very risky strategy–if the movie bombs, the investors lose everything and we get literally no money. With a deal with a major, we at least get some guaranteed money upfront. Doing it this way, there is NO guarantee. Plus, a huge distributor like Warners has 20 movies a year to mitigate risk–Darko and Rudius don’t have that luxury. We have to be right that this thing will do really well or we are in a world of fuck. But the upside is huge–if the movie is even a mild hit, we make ALL the money...On even a 40 million dollar box office with this movie, we are all swimming in money, whereas with a major distributor, we might have to hit 60 million before we start to see even pennies...Anytime I can bet on myself, I am down. It was ballsy and brilliant and I fucking loved it."

"EVEN a 40 million dollar box office" Ha!
[www.ihopetheyservebeerinhell.com]
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Edited by jrhys at 09/28/09 1:04 PM jrhys was starred jrhys was unstarred

jrhys
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
Fun fact: this film is being released as a service deal, which means that rather than selling the film to a distributor up front, filmmakers pay distribution costs themselves in hopes of keeping the profits. Indie film distribution is a bit of a mess right now, and a lot of people are doing this with 'niche' films, "The Passion of the Christ" being the highest grossing example of this model. By opening small Tucker was obviously counting on a niche hit to fuel enthusiasm for his wide release. This model has failed.
So: 1. If the 10/16 wide release is really wide, I'll eat my hat. At this point, I doubt it'll even happen.
2. Tucker is personally losing money on this thing by the minute. 3. His only hope of recouping costs is DVD, download, and VOD sales, which are very unlikely to net him any cash once his unscrupulous and tech savvy target audience rips it and puts it online for free.Poor baby!
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Edited by jrhys at 09/28/09 12:43 PM jrhys was starred jrhys was unstarred

YankBoffin
09/28/09

@jrhys: That fun fact made my day. Thank you!
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jrhys
09/28/09

@YankBoffin: Whoops I spoke too soon. He got investors to front the distribution costs. But he is still at personal financial risk ( see above).
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johnny_carsick
09/28/09

In reply to So How's That Tucker Max Movie Doing?
this is the way your career ends, bro. not with a bang (snort) but with, like, a fucking whimper.
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