Ted Cruz, bless his heart, has been out of the public eye for more than a week now. But it’s just a temporary reprieve: He’ll be back out brutally owning himself on the campaign trail soon.

A recent scandal out of Cranston, Rhode Island, is rocking the small New England city to its core. Sue Stenhouse, executive director of Cranston’s Senior Enrichment Center, resigned last week after asking a male bus driver to don a wig, earrings, and a really quite flattering shade of pink lipstick so that he would…

On Facebook, presidential candidate Deez Nuts (a.k.a. 15-year-old Brady Olson) endorsed Democrat Bernie Sanders and Republican John Kasich for their parties’ respective nominations. “This is not for the general election,” he clarified. “I endorse myself for the GE.”