Lock up your testicles. Octomom Nadya Suleman is on the prowl and bringing her love life into your living room, via a dating show on world's randomest cable network HDNet.

The Bachelor was breathtakingly ironic last night when contestant Rozlyn Pappa got kicked out for "cheating" on Bachelor Jake with a producer. Her elimination became a mindfuck when she told host Chris Harrison off for meddling in her "personal life."

Dancing With the Stars goes from camp to pure insanity when Donny Osmond, dressed as Jacko and wearing lipstick, dances the paso doble with Cyndi Lauper within the flashing interior of a Simon Says toy while LaToya Jackson looks on.