Gawker
vamp attack! chick scolds lazy hacks!
Posts Tagged “
tabloid media
”
vamp attack! chick scolds lazy hacks!
The Post reports that a woman was recently arrested at the Duane Reade on 94th and Third for stealing pain medication. Addiction is indeed an albatross; you have to be pretty hard up to commit yourself to finding a goddamn thing in a Duane Reade. We're thinking that perhaps the Post had some extra space to fill last night, seeing as how the lady was arrested for stealing fucking Aleve. Woman's got a headache, people! Ahh, but wait... 94th and Third does fall within the boundaries of the Upper East Side (despite looking a hell of a lot like Murray Hill) and Aleve is used to relieve aches and pains. How about: NABBED: POSH PAIN PILL PICKPOCKET. [NYP Police Blotter]
tmz killers
PageSix.com Launch Brings Us One Exciting Step Closer To Judgment Day
PageSix.com launched today with great fanfare,
where are they now
Rodney King Shot In Face; A TMZ Nation Mourns
Former taxi driver Rodney King, who had a 1992 riot named after him when the Los Angeles Police Department officers who were videotaped beating him on the street were acquitted, was shot in the face late last night. TMZ's commenters mourned the only way they know how.
The New York Post is all a-flutter today over how Brooke Astor's daughter-in-law, Charlene Marshall, "burst into laughter" when a Post photographer introduced himself to her yesterday, because of their funny "Bad Heir Day" cover. "We're A Hit With Mrs.," is the story's headline. We're surprised they went that far to promote themselves, since Mrs. Marshall is carrying yesterday's New York Sun in the accompanying photograph. (And on top of that she is carrying what looks like her husband's indictment, which strikes us as a bit callous, considering how hard she's hee-hawing away, but who's really keeping track?)
tabloid media
'Us Weekly' Online Loses Three Staffers In Two Weeks
"Violet Affleck Has Learned To Sing 'When You Wish Upon A Star'" was an actual headline on Usmagazine.com on November 6th, just 6 days after our sometime Guest Editor Noelle Hancock departed for the greener pastures of Pagesix.com. This was a sign that the site had already started hurting badly; it received two more blows this Tuesday when Us Online west coast blogger Megan Lynn left to join Pagesix.com's burgeoning west coast bureau and Colleen Curtis, who had been overseeing the website, was "mysteriously and abruptly" fired. We don't know much else about the exodus, except that "everyone didn't leave because they hate [EIC] Janice Min because they don't," and that our former Henry the Intern just went to be a Senior Editor there! Also, that one of their headlines this morning was "Angelina Jolie's Stylist Says Those Leather Pants Never Split," so maybe things are looking up, or at least holding steady.
capitalizing on tragedy
Missing Babies Are Cash Cows For Newspapers
A silver lining in the disappearance six months ago of 3-year-old Madeline McCann while on vacation with her family in Portugal? Sales for tabloids covering the case are up, says the New York Times! The struggling public relations industry has gotten a boost! Well it's about time someone came up with a viable solution for saving the communications industry. You can bet the U.S. tabloid editors are reading this and wondering which toddler to nab first.
European Tabloids Still Agog Months After Child Vanishes [NYT]
"The horror of having to evacuate homes during Malibu's biggest wildfire in recent history is not being helped by fallen pop star Britney Spears' recent custody troubles. 'Basically, all the paparazzi are still out there trying to get their Britney shot,' said one resident of the beachy burg. 'They don't even care much about the burning houses.'" [NYO, Photo: AP]
on the offense
Alleged Epstein Sex Vic Allegedly A Man!
Last week, we met young Maximilia "Ava" Cordero, who says she was degraded by maybe-millionaire money manager and sex disaster Jeffrey Epstein; her 57-year-old lover filed suit on her behalf against Epstein. Today, the NY Post has significantly advanced the storyline, claiming that Ms. Cordero is a man; she "was born Maximillian Cordero in 1983, records show." So that's why we couldn't find out anything about her—but the Post and their publicist who is also Jeffrey Epstein's publicist Howard Rubenstein sure could! "It wouldn't surprise me if the next claim was from the Loch Ness monster," says Epstein's lawyer. Really? Do you think that if you compare a transsexual to an immense and mysterious sea creature that we're still not going to believe he had sex with her? Or some actual sea critters, for that matter?
Gender-Bend Shocker [NY Post]
tabloid media
The PageSix.com Raiding Begins With Noelle Hancock
Noelle Hancock, who's been laboring at the Us Weekly website—she's a former New York Observer gal and one-time Gawker guest-editor—is the first hire that we've been able to confirm for the forthcoming blockbuster craziness that will be PageSix.com. Now it is on, TMZ! We have such great high expectations for the degrading battle of the web tabloid celebrity dirtiness that is coming so very soon—in particular, we hear PageSix.com will have a huge west coast bureau. Noelle, by the way, is the heterosexual lover of New York Times hottie Nick Confessore, who is apparently still on the Albany beat, the poor schmuck.
tabloid media
"TMZ TV," the most important development in television since Mary Hart first plastered on her face for Entertainment Tonight, continues to blow our minds. But they're not just an advance in the medium of television! We think you'll agree that their assault (demonstrated ably here) on the artificial public constructs and confusions of contemporary personhood is the best-articulated since Roland Barthes' Death of the Author!
TMZ Takes Stand Against Tree-Murderer Bette Midler
"TMZ TV," the most important development in television since Mary Hart first plastered on her face for Entertainment Tonight, continues to blow our minds. But they're not just an advance in the medium of television! We think you'll agree that their assault (demonstrated ably here) on the artificial public constructs and confusions of contemporary personhood is the best-articulated since Roland Barthes' Death of the Author!
the gossip
TMZ v. Perez Hilton: Which Should You Be Reading?
There are many important factors to take into account when deciding which trash gossip blog best suits your needs. Like: how many times per day would you like to hear about Amy Winehouse? Rosie and the Gays? "Icky icky poo" Bob Barker? How do you feel about the word "shiteous?" Intern Mary has made one of her signature charts, tallying 50 consecutive posts on Friday from both Harvey Levin's AOL/Telepictures (Warner Brothers)-owned gossip site and Mario Armando Lavandeira Jr.'s own place on the web. Which queen of new media should you prefer? It's like, are you hungry for Funyuns or those Andy Capp fries? More »
couples news
After last weeks's orgy of coverage of the on-again relationship between Star Editor at Large Julia Allison and College Humor founder and boy-millionaire Jakob Lodwick, we had promised ourselves we'd abstain for a while. But today they posted a video of a teary argument on Jakob's video-sharing site, Vimeo, and once again we found ourselves unable to turn away. Why? WHY? More »
Hey, Quit Paying Attention To Julia Allison And Jakob Lodwick!
After last weeks's orgy of coverage of the on-again relationship between Star Editor at Large Julia Allison and College Humor founder and boy-millionaire Jakob Lodwick, we had promised ourselves we'd abstain for a while. But today they posted a video of a teary argument on Jakob's video-sharing site, Vimeo, and once again we found ourselves unable to turn away. Why? WHY? More »
tabloid media
Child Sweatshops In The TMZ Age: The Indentured Paparazzi
Our decrepit and vacuous society has given birth to one of the more disturbing trends we've seen in awhile. The city of Los Angeles' most recent victims are junior varsity photogs 14-year-old Austin and 15-year-old Blaine, who runs Pint Size Paparazzi, with the help of thousands of dollars in equipment from their totally fucked-up parents, who don't seem concerned by Blaine's statement to Sunday's Times Style section: "I'm going to let this go as far as it takes me,'said Blaine, fidgeting with his V800. 'I want to be friends with the celebrities more than take photos of them. I kind of wish I was going to the parties with them.'" More »
What celebs move the most magazines? "We looked at the newsstand sales of the six leading celebrity weeklies—People, Star, US Weekly, In Touch Weekly, Life & Style and OK!—over a six-month period ending June 30, as supplied by the Audit Bureau of Circulations. We eliminated all non-celebrity and collage covers as well as special issues with exceptionally large rate bases. Then we counted how many more—or less—issues the celebrity's cover sold, as compared with the magazine's average newsstand sales." Your top three, in order: Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt, and Scarlett Johansson. The big loser? Britney Spears. [Forbes]
tabloid media
Howard K. Stern: I Am Not A Gay Druggie Kidnapping Ransomer!
Howard K. Stern, paramour and lawyer to fallen angel-temptress Anna Nicole Smith, is suing the holy heck out of Rita Cosby and her publisher, Hachette Book Group. Cosby's book, "Blonde Ambition: The Untold Story Behind Anna Nicole Smith's Death," which has pretty much only been read by tabloid mag staffers in need of innuendo for items, claims that Howard K. Stern and Anna Nicole babydaddy Larry Birkhead had an affair, for one thing. Birkhead's attorney—his client certainly has more case for grievance, because oh my God, Howard K. Stern, eww—says he'll file his own libel suit soon enough. Nifty! The legacy of Anna Nicole lives on!
