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Posts Tagged “

Tabloids

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investigations

Together We Can Stop The Crotch-Cam Madman!

A crazy man may be videotaping YOUR crotch. And putting the footage on the internet for all to see! The Post, in what is (trend alert) almost surely another story developed solely by poking around on YouTube, alerts the city to a man known only as "househead7d5." He enjoys taping men's crotches—at a phone booth, on the bus, on the subway—and posting the videos online, with clever comments like, "guy on the phone showin a little......gay sweatpants bulge phonebooth NYC," or, even creepier, "I love it when they fall asleep! not the biggest basket but he was a cutie pie nonetheless!" So who is this penis-peering multimedia madman? After the jump, we will investigate! More »

10:41 AM on Tue May 6 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
4,082 views, 35 comments

Latest by katieee: A friend of mine, using her family computer, once made the horrible discovery that her dad was a member of Yahoo's 'Down Blouse' group. more »

this is england

Brits Win Scandal Title With 'Mr. Gay UK' As Flesh-Eating Psycho Killer

Once again, American scandals hang their heads in shame. News comes from jolly old England that a former "Mr. Gay UK" has been arrested for murdering an ad executive from a gay magazine, and then eating some of him [Telegraph via Queerty]. Don't get any untoward ideas, though; they were just "friends." The killer also had some flesh from the man's right leg diced up, cooked, and ready to season when the cops came in. That does seem incriminating. Eat your heart out, Jeffrey Dahmer—you never won any pageants at all. A full beefcake photo (pretty much NSFW) of the award-garnering cannibal, Anthony Morley, from the time of his glorious 1993 title win, is after the jump: More »

11:32 AM on Fri May 2 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
4,227 views, 43 comments

Latest by katieee: @contradicto: He had mutton to lose. more »

journalismism

Post Demands The Government Make Terrorists Angrier

If the New York Post had to name three things that it can't stand, those things would be: cultural sensitivity, wisdom, and peace (fourth: stepping on gum). That's why the paper is outraged that "the Bush administration has gone all PC in the War on Terror." They've stopped using words like "jihad" and "Islamo-fascism" because they may be provocative or offensive. The Post's jaw literally dropped onto the floor at that news! Right onto the floor! So the neocon, Murdoch-owned scandal sheet had to evoke the memory of prominent socialist revolutionary George Orwell to help it call for harsher language about the Arabian menace: More »

10:15 AM on Thu May 1 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
810 views, 15 comments

Latest by Breliant: How long before Christopher Hitchens responds to this? more »

scandals

Roger Clemens Can't Stop With The Cheating

Geez Roger Clemens, do you mind if we go a single day without being bombarded by news of yet another one of your past trysts with a Southern blond woman somehow vaguely connected to pop culture? Monday we learned that scowling baseball great Clemens, self-proclaimed paragon of family virtue, cheated on his wife with a continuously intoxicated country music star. More girlfriends came out in the subsequent days. And now we're battered with the news that the rich pitcher may have had a romance with the ex-wife of a fat, drunk professional golfer [NYDN]. Is nothing sacred? More »

9:25 AM on Thu May 1 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
4,132 views, 42 comments

Latest by scroll_lock: @BalknChain: Just the way your mother likes it. more »

scolds

Andrea Peyser Gives Billy Ray Cyrus A Lot To Think About

Rabid New York Post attack columnist and X-ray pornographer Andrea Peyser finally weighs in today with her take on the Miley Cyrus uproar, and a breathless city exhales. She's upset! Now she has to add Miley to the list of pop stars "not welcome in my house" (you're on there too, Jamie Lynn Spears). But she reserves most of her contempt for Miley's dad Billy Ray Cyrus, a "one-hit wonder who lives like a leech off his billion-dollar baby." Zing! We agree the photo of the two together was a little weird. But Peyser is also mad that Billy didn't stop his teen daughter from being such a freaking idiot when she opens her mouth: More »

9:32 AM on Wed Apr 30 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
3,351 views, 38 comments

Latest by kenneth212: I'm still in shock that the New York Post would hire and transgender woman to be a columnist. more »

scandals

Roger Clemens: Baseball's Eliot Spitzer

Here on day two of the Roger Clemens Infidelity Scandal And Schadenfreude Festival Of '08, it's becoming more clear that the brawny former Yankees ace pitcher and full time jerk did in fact cheat on his wife with the wild country singer Mindy McCready. Because now she's admitted it! McCready said the two did have an ongoing affair, although the sex didn't start until she was of legal age. They first met when she was only 15, (Miley Cyrus joke). But the most entertaining aspect of this scandal is how Clemens—heroic, honored, self-righteous, dismissive of critics, a King of New York—is turning into an uncanny baseball version of another recently fallen hero: Eliot Spitzer. More »

10:42 AM on Tue Apr 29 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
3,979 views, 44 comments

Latest by maxfield1: @scroll_lock: We need the Law Office of Bob Lablaw! more »

roger clemens

Baseball's Meanest Star In Alleged Affair With Country Version Of Amy Winehouse

Roger Clemens, the recently retired former Yankees ace pitcher and full time Class A jerk, has used his commitment to his wife (pictured) and family as a defense of his own character, which has been impugned by steroid allegations. And, you know, by his own general asshole demeanor that causes him to do things like throw a fastball at his own son. But today the Daily News says that Clemens carried on a ten year affair with train wreck country singer Mindy McCready—although they never trot out any real proof. And their lead, which seems to imply Clemens is a statutory rapist, is a little problematic: More »

9:10 AM on Mon Apr 28 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
8,095 views, 28 comments

Latest by Dusty in the Wind: @In Other News...: Thank you--for my spelling, among other things, surely comes and goes... more »

the rich

Celebrity Babies Save The World!

Celebrities and their kids are saving the earth from extinction by doing stuff! We always knew this to be the case. Today it's confirmed by the Daily News' servicey feature telling us how celebrities raise their kids to be "eco-friendly." By recycling them? No silly, by giving them pretentious names and then having their publicists send out a press release every time they buy them a carton of organic juice! Evidence of how low the bar for parenting and environmental self-congratulation has sunk: e-vites, cooking vegetables, and hardwood floors. More »

11:35 AM on Thu Apr 17 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
2,569 views, 31 comments

Latest by famousauthor: Candy carrots! more »

journalismism

Col Allan Has No Time For The Facts

Have you heard any wild rumors about anything in the news from any source at all? Why not call New York Post editor Col Allan so he can put it right in the paper! Last Thursday, Col's wife phoned him and said "Elaine died!"—referring to a family friend in Australia. But Allan, with a newspaperman's instincts, naturally assumed she was talking about famous restaurateur Elaine Kaufman. So he set his city desk to work calling all over town, asking her friends about her death. Finally some qualified reporter who should be fired immediately pointed out that, based on actual facts, Kaufman was not dead. Reminiscent of the Post's glorious, fictional splash about John Kerry choosing Dick Gephardt for his running mate, which likely originated with Rupert Murdoch. Ha, reporting for the Post is just like playing a game of Telephone! In Allan's defense, "Mistakes happen, chicken fish monkey pineapple." [Daily Intel]

10:31 AM on Wed Apr 16 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
286 views, 12 comments

Latest by famousauthor: Tomorrow's headline: "COL ALLAN PROMOTED TO GENERAL. GEPHARDT TO BE NEW EDITOR OF POST." more »

bugs

Whole Foods, Environmentalists Support Cockroach Invasion

Being a limp-wristed, knee-jerk environmentalist liberal, you probably thought that Whole Foods' plan to phase out plastic bags in its stores was a good thing. Sure it is—if you love cockroaches. That's the sober warning in an editorial in the New York Post today, penned by Jeff Stier of the conservative "science" group ACSH, which is funded by Dow Chemical, Chevron, and a slew of other corporations. See, cockroaches "prefer paper (bags) to plastic," which logically means that Whole Foods is virtually holding your door open and setting up a nice buffet for the bugs! And it gets worse: they're also trying to give you asthma. More »

9:17 AM on Wed Apr 16 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
2,892 views, 59 comments

Latest by LUV2CattleCall: @hamburgerhotdog: Interesting that you mention this occurs in poor neighborhoods....perhaps because they can't afford the highly effective Ironic Breeze? more »

journalismism

Reporter Bravely Disregards Own Dignity To Go Undercover At Reality Show Audition

Daily News reporter Shallon Lester wasn't satisfied just secretly yearning to be friends with Paris Hilton, like most entertainment reporters. She wants to actually be her friend! On TV, at least. (Pictured: an actual photo montage of what the two would look like if their heads were in close proximity, via the NYDN). So the intrepid journalist ventured out to the auditions for the upcoming MTV show and small step towards the apocalypse "Paris Hilton Is My New BFF." How could a trained, professional journalist possibly blend in with a crowd of fame whores? It wasn't that hard at all! More »

10:41 AM on Tue Apr 15 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
3,275 views, 17 comments

Latest by LeGagneur: Just promise that you'll give an update in a month. more »

richard martin

Crazy Old Bay Ridge Man Faces Tenant Revolt

Richard Martin, the crazy sign-posting super in Bay Ridge who enjoys insulting tenants and watching his little dog ride the mechanical pony, is back in his proper place: the newspaper. The Daily News, determined to win the Martin-related tabloid war, reports today that the crazy old coot has finally moved the garbage cans out of his lobby, where he had placed them to piss off his tenants. He clarifies that those tenants are still, however, "disgusting slobs." But one anonymous tenant has struck back by lighting one of Martin's crazy signs on fire "and scorching the wall behind it." War! Could this be the end for our hero's reign of textual terror? Heaven forbid. In remembrance, a photo of our all time favorite Richard Martin sign [via BeehiveHairdresser] after the jump. We call it "Irish Fucking Christmas." More »

12:22 PM on Mon Apr 7 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
1,872 views, 27 comments

Latest by mockingbird: @PimpMyCouch: You're welcome! My meds don't mix well with liquor, so I'm limited to throwing angry looks at the neighbor kids these days. But they're heavy with portent, so they pack a punch. more »

celebrities

Is George Clooney The Nemesis Of The Tabloid Economy?

George Clooney has jokes. His latest celebrity-based antics: a swarm of paparazzi descended upon his house in Italy after a (false) rumor spread that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were going to be getting married there. Clooney, who was away working, heard about this, and ordered 15 large wedding tables to be set up on the house's lawn. The paps went crazy [Hollyscoop]! Clooney laughed. He's a funny guy. But there's more to this than just a friendly joke. Because George Clooney, one of the biggest celebrities in the world, doesn't just want to make himself chuckle; he wants to undermine the entire celebrity economy that gives him his lofty position in the first place. More »

12:47 PM on Thu Apr 3 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
9,670 views, 69 comments

Latest by Dorothy: Why the farse?@secretagentman: more »

scandals

Spitzer Hooker #2 (?) Update: Everyone Is Lying, Says Everyone Else

Here we are in the fifth day of the Possible Spitzer Hooker #2 saga, and the tabloid accusations continue to fly back and forth like so many bullets made of sex. Kristin Davis, who everyone agrees ran several high-priced call girl rings, also stands accused by the Post of servicing Eliot Spitzer himself; the Daily News says she has no connection to the Love Guv. The latest developments: Daily News sez madam serviced big sports star; No way, sez Post. Plus: Is the Kristin Davis "Black Book" client list a hoax? The Post says yes, for some reason! More »

9:12 AM on Mon Mar 31 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
2,474 views, 14 comments

Latest by nltisme: I am depressed and lonely....gonna shoot myself with a gun fulla sex bullets and see if I feel better. more »

Spitzer Hooker Mystery Update Regarding our earlier post about all the conflicting stories surrounding possible Spitzer hooker #2 Kristin Davis: a reliable source at the Daily News assures us that the paper did not pay for Davis' "Black Book" client list, which someone was shopping around to us yesterday. They also reiterated that in all their digging, the Daily News has not come up with any connection between Spitzer and Davis; the Post's sourcing remains a mystery.

4 comments

scandals

Did This Hooker Sleep With Eliot Spitzer Or Not?

The story of Kristin Davis, who the Post fingered yesterday as not only a high-priced madam, but also another hooker visited by Eliot Spitzer, is actually getting more interesting. Why? Because every new story that comes out makes it less clear if Davis actually has any connection to Spitzer. The Post says she does! The Daily News says she doesn't! And the Times doesn't really say anything! Verrrrrrrrrrryyy interesting. Somebody has screwed up on this story, big time. After the jump, we speculate—plus, we have some insight into the Daily News' big "Madam's Black Book" cover story today. More »

9:45 AM on Fri Mar 28 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
3,321 views, 27 comments

Latest by TripMcCane: "If the face is shit, you still must remit." Johnny Cockring, pimp to celebrity (kind-of) lookalike hookers. more »

eliot spitzer

Wowee, Another Spitzer Hooker

We never thought we'd see the day when the Governor of New York's illegal sex trysts would give us only a renewed sense of ennui, but: Okay, we get it. The guy liked hookers. If the Post keeps this up, lots of other valuable yellow journalism will fail to make the front page. Click to enlarge the cover shot. And after the jump, Eliot Spitzer hooker #2 Kristin Davis' MySpace picture, JUST TO GET IT OUT OF THE WAY: More »

9:42 AM on Thu Mar 27 2008
By Hamilton Nolan
25,806 views, 130 comments

Latest by noiseyneighbor: There is nothing "Lil" about Mama's "Lipgloss" more »

tabloids

You Have to Hand it to Them

Whatever your feelings toward the New York Post, the feisty tab sure does have a way with headlines. And, of course, Page Six has no problem boasting about it—or cross-promoting tasty corporate products. Harper Entertainment, which, like the Post, is owned by monolithic News Corp., is publishing Headless Body in Topless Bar, a celebration of some of the paper's greatest hits. Page Six's top picks after the jump. More »

2:47 PM on Sun Mar 23 2008
By ian spiegelman
3,107 views, 52 comments