See? Then they'll dissolve the Senate and create the Galactic Empire.

The big award went to work for Uniqlo, the Japanese clothing retailer that creepily resembles a Far East version of American Apparel. With "Uniqlock," you can watch many Japanese people doing dances while wearing Uniqlo clothes, and that is too revolutionary to be put into words, almost!

"The industry is always talking about viral," said Titanium jury panelist Jean-Remy von Matt, Founder & Member of The Board. "The Uniqlo work is viral branded utility. It's so simple, smart and beautiful. All over the world people have it on their desktops, giving them a brand presence in countries where their products don't even exist."

Just what every company wants: huge popularity "in countries where their products don't even exist." The future is about brand presence, not about making money! Here's a YouTube clip of Uniqlo's [Robot] dancers in action. At least American Apparel ads have naked people.

[Portfolio]

Whether or not it's a symbol of the decline of political discourse, the debate certainly is a pain in the ass to follow. The Personal Democracy Forum, which organized the debate, encourages people to follow by watching a list of search results (which feels like any comment thread full of self-important randoms) or watching this page combining the Twitter feeds of Cox and the two debaters.

On one end of this spectrum is Grand Theft Auto IV, which contained a rich in-game media world that included a mini-Internet, radio and TV shows. GTA could mock other media from the perspective of another mature medium, since the best-selling game was no niche product.

On the other end is MMORPG Tycoon, in which the player must make a popular and profitable online game by balancing in-game elements, business expenses, and technical elements such as computer servers. Tycoon uses the tools of creating games as its game. Here the jokes target the stereotypes of role-playing games and the game industry, and the intended audience is one already familiar with the genre.

Recursive gaming is not entirely new; in 2000, The Sims let in-game characters play a video game. And the RPG Spacequest let players fool around on an in-game arcade game. But now the game-playing population has exploded, as have the games themselves, with much larger and richer worlds than the two-dimensional backgrounds of years ago. In fact, some reviewers found GTA IV's mundane tasks — drive someone around, go to a club, sit through conversations — too boring. As players get used to gaming for hours and hours, they won't turn off the game for entertainment — they'll find a better game inside it.

Dodgeball was like Twitter, only instead of saying what you were doing you said where you were. Basically any time you went to a bar or restaurant, you could tell all your friends through Dodgeball, and they could come hang out with you.

The site caught on among Gawker employees, like half of whom are friends of friends with Dodgeball founder Dennis Crowley. It also took over a group of techies in San Francisco, a group I joined in early 2006 that included dot-commers, Apple employees, and bloggers.

These crowds aren't just early adopters, they particularly love social technology — anything you can overshare on. So everyone was everyone's Dodgeball buddy, and the site upended our social dynamic. One night, two people Dodgeballing from a bar drew a crowd of thirty. I used Dodgeball to get a ride home when I got mugged.

I also found weird emergent behavior. For example, I wouldn't just keep track of my friends — I kept tabs on my frenemies, so I could more easily avoid them. Crowley supposedly checked in from false locations to keep people off his trail. Friends would get deeply insulted if they were taken off a notification list, and god did the parties get awkward when one person realized they were the only one not getting a text message when their friend walked in the room. I hooked up with a girl because she shoved her phone in my face, showing a friend-of-friend alert from Dodgeball, and said "Is this you?"

Okay, this was just a group of geeks, but that doesn't mean this behavior won't go mainstream. We've learned that from Facebook and (to a lesser extent) Twitter. So why is the iPhone the thing that'll do it?

Like I said, there's the price: The iPhone is now a reasonably affordable phone with a growing user base. It's as cheap as an iPod was when that blew up.

There's Apple's desire to change customer behavior, pushing technological advantages to the public that previously would only attract tech geeks. The iPhone makes people behave differently: They're more apt to pull up web pages (iPhone users download five times the data of normal AT&T users), they treat texts like IM chats, and now they'll assume everyone knows where everyone is.

And maybe, there's Loopt cashing in on this promise by marketing its service and pushing out all competitors. Who knows if they will? Dodgeball just didn't catch on fast enough, and maybe it wasn't just because it required users to remember to text out every time they went to a bar. Maybe it will get hype — like the excited New York Times piece predicting Dodgeball would be the next Friendster — but not major acceptance. Maybe people aren't ready (and some people never will be) to tell everyone where they are. But Facebook and Twitter have already expanded people's view of what's worth sharing with friends, and I think all Loopt has to do is equate itself with the concept of "checking in" from a place. Just like Facebook took over the idea of having an online analogue to your real-world life, and Twitter owns the idea of microblogging (even though dozens of other services have tried and failed to compete).

So what does Loopt do? Same as Dodgeball and Twitter: Say where you are, what you're doing, maybe send a photo. It's a lot of the stuff other sites already do, with the added benefit of pinning all the activity to a place. The company is pitching it as a way to know where your friends are, as often as possible. It will become normal to know, at a glance, where the people you know are. Here's their demo from this morning:

One emergent behavior I expect is the ultra-documented party. Bad enough with camera phones and blogging, but right now if I want to find party photos I need to search around. With Loopt I'll just check everything that happened at one bar on one night.

Has someone ever thought it'd be cute to "stalk" you with a few cameraphone shots on Flickr? (I have!) That'll get a little creepier when they're sending your exact location to the web in real-time.

You know too much about reporter-socialite Julia Allison? Well you're about to know HOW MUCH FUN she's having at that TOTALLY AWESOME PARTY with her CLOSE CLOSE FRIEND MARY. And you'll know it's all happening six blocks away.

And eventually, if you're caught going out for a drink without inviting all your friends, some lonely acquaintance of yours is going to bug you about why they weren't part of the group. Thanks a lot Apple.

Of course if you're a blogger, you won't notice the difference! Hey-oh!

[via Modern Mechanix]

"Some Internet experts believe the next generation of the Web — Web 3.0 — will make tasks like your search for movies and food faster and easier. Instead of multiple searches, you might type a complex sentence or two in your Web 3.0 browser, and the Web will do the rest. In our example, you could type "I want to see a funny movie and then eat at a good Mexican restaurant. What are my options?" The Web 3.0 browser will analyze your response, search the Internet for all possible answers, and then organize the results for you." [HowStuffWorks]

So thankfully, the masses here aren't being asked to write the movie but to help produce it. The creators of Iron Sky divided production tasks into chunks that they farmed out using their online system, Wreck A Movie. They built this system after putting together their first collaborative film, Star Wreck:

Wreck A Movie was also used for the Finnish horror film Sauna, which looks like a Northern European version of Guillermo del Toro.

The Iron Sky crew is also asking fans to buy promo packages, calling them "war bonds." Again, a great way to mobilize a crowd in an entertaining way without actually ruining your movie. And whatever comes out of this, it'll be hella better than Snakes On A Plane.

The word is diluted in Japan now that millions of Japanese are "10-or-20-proof otaku." But in America, the term never even kept its Japanese meaning, since the phrase was adopted by the very people popularizing peculiar Japanese tastes among a Western audience.

Of course, there's a lot of room left for normalization, and most Americans seem to still view Japanese culture as a freak show. But eventually we'll realize that most of Japan's modern freakiness — humiliating game shows, gimmicky porn — are less Japanese than we think. (If you dubbed gibberish over some American TV and porn, added subtitles, and clipped the wildest scenes out context I doubt it would look that different from the Japanese culture we see on YouTube.) Japanese culture will become normal for all nerds as nerdiness becomes normal for all people. By the end of the synthesis, otaku will just be another part of the nerd in all of us.

David Gates
Newsweek isn't known for its prose, but David Gates's style was the exception. His review of Colson Whitehead's novel Apex Hides the Hurt had intern Alexis at hello. His first novel Jernigan, received a rave from the hard-to-please Michiko Kakutani in the New York Times, "The minute he starts talking, Peter Jernigan, the narrator of David Gates's astonishing first novel, grabs you by the lapels and compels you to listen to the sad-funny-tragic story of his life." Newsweek has few other writers with such style, and he will be missed.

David Ansen
Since January 26, 1958, Newsweek film critic David Ansen has been counting every movie he seen. By October 29, 2007, he was up to 7,714, and counting. A member of the Los Angeles Film Critics Association, National Society of Film Critics and New York Film Critics Circle, Ansen will have to reach 10,000 on his own.

Cathleen McGuigan
A graduate of Brown and Harvard, Cathleen McGuigan is an adjunct professor at the Columbia Journalism School. Her 1986 description of Soho artist as "America's last pioneers, urban nomads in search of wide open interior spaces" for Newsweek is a Bartleby notable quote.

Harold Shain
Harold Shain was a business man. The former president and chief operating officer of Newsweek in March 1998 left the position to become the chief executive of Newsweek Budget Travel just last October. He couldn't have known then that only a few months later he would be accepting a buyout from the Washington Post company.

Alexis Gelber
Alexis Gelber was literally married to Newsweek. That's an approximation of the headline of her Times wedding announcement to Mark Whitaker: "Alexis Gelber Married To Newsweek Writer. Gelber was also a judge on Barnard's annual writing contest for 11th-grade girls in New York City public high schools in 1999.

Nancy Cooper
Senior editor Nancy Cooper took us into Y2K, editing the Newsweek's news section on 2000 from 1997 until the aughts.

George Hackett
If there's one man who embodied the general interest spirit of Newsweek, it was George Hackett. The senior editor worked in the Science & Technology, oversaw the coverage of the Salt Lake City Games, edited Perspectives and My Turn sections. He also started 1994, he initiated Focus: On Technology, which ironically centered on the rise of the internet, which would be one cause of his buyout.

Short answer? No.

Long answer? In early September, my brother Vlad and I received an email from YouTube inviting our show to their exclusive and romantic-sounding Partner Program with the delicious lure of actual profit.

Break a Leg is a full-length internet sitcom. It's filmed in high-definition, with real actors, full scripts, at least a dozen or so locations and is released weekly. This at a price, of course. Higher quality means a crew, it means a sound designer to fix our sound, it means a production coordinator to get over 10 actors together, it means securing locations as exotic as a sewer, a high school, and an old Wild West ghost town.

So, when YouTube offered money, we couldn't help but salivate just a little. Could this be the thing we need? Could this help us feed ourselves, quit our jobs, pay the crew? Could we make Break a Leg and focus on creating the first self-sufficient high quality, full-length internet sitcom?

In two years of doing Break a Leg, we have made around $2,500.

So, no, probably not.

Here's how it all breaks down: with over 2 million views on YouTube, we've received roughly $1,600 from their Partner Program. We also over half a million views at YouTube competitor Blip.tv, worth a whopping $100. Finally another competitor MetaCafe featured us on their front page and with nearly 100,000 views, we made $500 - which is great, except the only way you'll ever get that many views is if you win a contest (like us) or your show is primarily about how round and pretty the female breast is. Plus a year later, MetaCafe still hasn't paid us.

YouTube is the only game in town right now; they're the only ones who can afford to pay significant sums of money. To be fair they never promised a network-sized budget by any means. The problem is that the most YouTube can do is barely feed a one-man, low-quality show about, say, kittens.

So until the Internet can produce any real amount of money for good creators, there's no way it will ever be the future of TV as everyone in "new media" exclaims. The purpose of entertainment and art isn't to get smaller, quicker and catchier; it's to push the boundaries, to grow, to teach and to create. With no money and an endless stream of throw-away content made for a dime and worth about as much, the shows that can challenge network TV will eventually get grabbed up by those networks or they'll just give up and go on to greener pastures - like carpentry and porn.

So, are we rich yet? Hardly. But we're waiting for your call, Mr. Guffman.

Below, the trailer for Break a Leg.

I'm one of those people who never makes plans and thus ends up calling six people at eight o'clock and ending up eating dinner alone. For a while, I sent mass dinner invites on Twitter, but that only broadcast that I was a loser.

Now imagine I know who's close by. Thank Jesus I don't have GPS, or I'd text people saying "Dude, you're just four blocks away, come eat with me!" So unavoidably awkward.

After intensely studying the works of Volney Mathison, inventor of the e-meter, and L. Ron Hubbard, who ripped off Mathison to make his own similar meter, I've reached into the future and hacked, ripped off, and refined the e-meters of the past with this Mark 9000 e-meter! The improvements you'll notice right away. And this is handcrafted! And I don't even want to tell you how long it took to make!

On the front you will see that it is a simplified reading from either Mathison's or Scientology's. If there is an engram or a thetan, the meter will show that, and the non-functioning lights will wish they could blink appropriately. Note also that the dial on the lower left goes up to 11! Show me anybody else's meter that goes to 11!

On the inside you will see the technology I have discovered. What better way to detect thetans but with thetans! The green porcine thetan looks for nonhuman entities, and the cute girl/clock thetan looks for human entities. I've used high-tensile ultra-clear tape to ensure that this product is as good as it gets! And the string has a tensile strength of 20 pounds!

One of the cans is a real Campbell's name-brand can, while the other is an off-brand. I did this to create an oscillating tone between the cans that helps wake up the thetans as you hold the cans.

This is the one-of-a-kind prototype, so no warranty is included. But if you have any thetans after 90 days of use, I'll gladly give a refund provided the thetans sign a statement saying "I'm still here, jackass."

Going to the movies sucks. I do not need to elaborate on what Dave Barry probably did a column about in 1992: tiny screens, mediocre sound, bad crowds. The theater is just another store in the mall where you consume a product while avoiding contact with other shoppers. But it could be a magical experience!

We're already heading toward this with 3d movies — there are three major 3d formats competing, and they're turning the feature into a real dimension of movie-watching, not just a novelty for when sticks poke out at you. For now it's mostly animation, but action flicks will inevitably go 3d when Michael Bay realizes the format's potential for hiding his lack of talent.

But to really get me to the theater, I want beer. And liquor. And dinner. And not just at those special little indie theaters, I want it in every town in America. I want to know that in this great nation I can walk into any theater and meet a raucous bunch of drunks — which I already can do, but I want to know those drunks are paying the theater tons of money. And then I want to watch a second show without leaving, just like the old-time drive-thrus, and I want to sneer at people who buy the DVD on opening day so they can bring it home with a Starbucks and Chinese takeout. And I want a steak! A steak at my seat while I watch Michael Bay explode robots.

Michael Pollan, In Defense of Food: "Food is good. You know who's written a lot about food? Wikipedia, bitch."

Andrew Morton, Tom Cruise: "Andrew Morton thinks Tom Cruise is scary. Well Wikipedia is not scary. Also, I am much better on video."

Benazir Bhutto, Reconciliation: "If Pakistan is in so much trouble, how did its citizens contribute ten thousand edits to Wikipedia, the world's most comprehensive encyclopedia? Also Benazir Bhutto is dead."

John Grisham, The Appeal: "Grisham claims that 'Political and legal intrigue ensue when a Mississippi court decides against a chemical company accused of dumping toxic waste.' Wikipedia is awesome."

Please welcome Mike Wang, the USG Vice-President and, according to his friends, a guy with "nice hair" who is a "chill guy" and "magic!"

But! Then I noticed that, above a billboard for some A&E show called Paranormal State were some speakers that looked like hypersonic sound beams, a device which uses your skull as a speaker—that is, it transmits soundwaves that resonate against whatever surface they hit.

So when they hit your head, it sounds like the call is coming from the inside the brain-house.

The billboard says 73% of Americans believe and I'm assuming that that means 73% of Americans believe in ghosts. So if that's true, why try to convert the skeptical/not crazy 27% by beaming voices into their heads? That's just greedy. Also it leads to a lingering sense of serious mental violation. How soon will it be until in addition to the Do Not Call list, we'll have a Do Not Beam Commercial Messages Into My Head list?

Each team basically agreed on the following: They wanted to preserve and incorporate the High Line Park, create additional green space, and make the space environmentally sustainable. Several emphasized diversity of architectural styles and materials, as well as creating "intimate" spaces within larger ones.

Steven Holl, presenting for Extell, was up first, with what seemed to be the most thoughtful and poetic vision, showing a photo that was taken the year that "the last boxcar went over the Highline, [which] was full of frozen turkeys." "Why not build it greener than anyone else?" he asked, explaining that runoff water could be recycled and adding that his team was careful not to make buildings tower around the park, creating an unpleasant "canyon space." (The second team said hat they, too, were avoiding a "bottom of the well" effect.)

Extell's architectural showpiece would be a triple-tower, all three buildings joined together at the top. Holl added that, in the event of an incoming airplane or an explosion (Seriously: "God forbid, if an explosion or an airplane" is what he said) there would be multiple ways to escape.

He ended by saying that, from the proposed park, one would be able to see the moon passing over the Empire State Building.

Group #2, the alliance of Related and Goldman Sachs and NewsCorp., proposed the area as an expansion of what its Powerpoint presentation called "exciting media district continues the trend West (ABC, NY Times, Heart, Time Warner)." They showed a rendering of a glass building with a banner across it reading "Myspace.com." Seriously. The future, from this perspective, looked scary. At least they mentioned their commitment to building affordable housing.

Group #3, which is Durst and Vornado and Conde Nast, mentioned an "iconic point tower" and a greenspace built like a "wild terrarium," as well as a "galleria," which in computerized renderings appeared to be more of a what one calls a "shopping mall." Oh, and an "automated people mover" similar to AirTrain. Where would the people be moved to, and why? They didn't say.

Proposal #4, from Brookfield, seemed slightly more intelligent, with a "sky exposure analysis" and six new residential towers. They proposed a park that could host Fashion Week and serve as a 24-hour nightlife and cultural center. The kind of place at which one could buy weed and Rolexes. I hope so.

Then came the last proposal, from big bad Tishman Speyer and Morgan Stanley. When the first rendering came up, rather jarringly different from the rest, a collective realization of "WTF" washed over the room. "Four monumental towers that taper as they rise up," their man said, mumbling away in a fast monotone and nearly unintelligible accent. "This is awful," the woman next to me moaned. It truly was. Do not give the bid to Tishman Speyer.

You can judge all of this for yourself, though. The bid proposals will be on public view at 335 Madison Avenue from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. through December 14.

BRAVO PARTNERS WITH FOUR LEADING DIGITAL CABLE OPERATORS BRINGING INTERACTIVE AD-SUPPORTED VOTING AND POLLING TO "PROJECT RUNWAY"

Cox, Charter, Comcast and Time Warner Cable Team Up With Bravo For Industry First

NEW YORK, NY - December 3, 2007 - Bravo today announced a partnership with Cox, Charter, Comcast and Time Warner Cable to bring ad-supported viewer interactivity to the fourth season of "Project Runway," marking a groundbreaking industry initiative that was previously limited to just one digital cable operator at a time. Now, four of the country's leading multi-platform distributors will offer the same ad-supported advanced advertising application across multiple markets, giving viewers in select cities the opportunity to respond to trivia questions and vote for their favorite "Project Runway" designs and contestants during the show using their digital cable set-top box remote controls. The interactivity is possible through the deployment of interactive television applications in conjunction with Navic Networks' technology.

"NBC Universal is committed to putting technology and resources towards advanced advertising partnerships between our networks and our partners in multiple markets," said Brian Hunt, Senior Vice President, Marketing & Sales Strategy, NBC Universal TV Networks Distribution. "We're excited to offer our advertisers a national footprint opportunity as interactive television applications are implemented in an open standards format."

The interactive overlays during "Project Runway," sponsored exclusively by Brother International Corporation, provide a measurable in-program opportunity for the advertiser. Brother is the official sewing company of "Project Runway" season four.

"It's natural for viewers to interact with their TV's using their remote controls and we're confident this application and timely deal will engage even more viewers and continue to grow the series' loyal fan base," said Lisa Hsia, Senior Vice President, New Media, Bravo.

Throughout the fourth season of the hit series, trivia and polling overlays will appear seamlessly over the program. Using Navic Networks' technology, these overlays are synchronized to occur at precise content-relevant moments during the one-hour show, and the viewer's votes are compiled in real time and revealed during the show. The real time voting and polling will be available to Cox customers in Phoenix, Tucson, San Diego and Las Vegas; Charter customers in Los Angeles; Comcast customers in West Palm Beach and Palm Beach; and Time Warner Cable customers in Greensboro, North Carolina.

The fourth season of "Project Runway," set in the glamorous and rigorous world of New York's fashion industry, opens the door for fifteen budding designers to break into the fashion business. Each Wednesday night at 10 p.m. ET/PT, contestants are whittled down to the finalists who will show their own line in front of an audience of fashion industry movers and shakers at New York Fashion Week. In what will prove to be the most exciting season yet, some of the biggest names in fashion, sports and design will guest star this season on the series. Host supermodel Heidi Klum heads a panel of industry luminaries, including judges Michael Kors, top women's and men's wear designer, and Nina Garcia, ELLE magazine's fashion director, as they decide who is "in" and who is "out." Tim Gunn, Chief Creative Officer, Liz Claiborne, Inc. will once again act as a mentor to the contestants as they navigate weekly fashion challenges.

About Bravo
Bravo is a program service of NBC Universal Cable Entertainment, a division of NBC Universal one of the world's leading media and entertainment companies in the development, production, and marketing of entertainment, news, and information to a global audience. Bravo has been an NBC cable network since December 2002 and was the first television service dedicated to film and the performing arts when it launched in December 1980. For more information visit www.BravoTV.com.

About NBC Universal TV Networks Distribution
NBC Universal TV Networks Distribution, a division of NBC Universal, one of the world's preeminent media companies, drives the company's cable strategic development and growth including video-on-demand, pay-per-view, HDTV, TV EST (electronic sell-through), TV Wireless distribution and retransmission consent, and oversees the cable distribution, marketing and local ad sales of sixteen properties (Bravo, Chiller, CNBC, CNBC World, MSNBC, mun2, NBC Weather Plus, Oxygen, SCI FI, ShopNBC, Sleuth, Telemundo, Telemundo Puerto Rico, Universal HD, USA and the Olympics on cable).

###

Everyone,

Today we're announcing some significant changes that are part of our ongoing migration of Court TV to truTV. Our plans include a revamp of how - and where - entertainment and trial content is used on the Web.

On Jan. 1, 2008, courttv.com will become truTV.com. We will make truTV.com a popular destination, with an abundance of video content and materials exclusive to the Web. Our archive of stories from crimelibrary.com will be available as well.

Online trial coverage will shift to CNN.com from courttvnews.com. CNN plans to launch a new section of its site, CNN.com/crime. This section will replace CNN.com/law, providing a strong destination for crime news, trial coverage and news from the Justice Department. This section will be managed by CNN.com staffers in Atlanta.

These changes will lead to reductions in our online group. Sixteen positions on Court TV's Web staff will be eliminated. Fifteen staffers will continue to work on the new truTV.com. Of course, we'll work closely with colleagues who are directly impacted to provide whatever professional transition assistance we can.
In addition, we are reducing positions in some other areas - six in operations and two in daytime.

I'd like to thank everyone for their contribution to the success of Court TV, courttv.com and courttvnews.com. We are saddened to let people go, but these changes are a necessary part of a larger strategic plan to make our network stronger.

Marc Juris

General Manager, Court TV/truTV

Fecal matter and urine are placed in a bottle or jar and covered most commonly with a balloon. The container is then placed in a sunny area for several hours or days until fermented. The contents of the container will separate and release a gas, which is captured in the balloon....Once ingested the onset of the high takes approximately 10 seconds with the most severe hallucinations happening in approximately 20 minutes.

New Drug Alert [TSG]

But beyond answering the bigger questions of life (Ikea: here, btw), Twitter also has the "benefit" of amplifying your drunken text messages to everyone you know and some you don't. Take this cautionary tale from Twitter user Chris Messina:

He described how in April he and his partner, Tara Hunt, "had a big fight after we'd been drinking and then she Twittered that she was leaving me." Because her message went out very late, most of the Twitter users who read the posts were in Australia. Many e-mailed Ms. Hunt to ask what happened. Those messages helped persuade the couple to reconsider.

"Hello?"

"Oh, kneadynips, it's The Past. Can I just tell you it's all so over?"

"Over the top? Over the limit? Overdone? Overcooked?"

"It's just, like, Over. Nightlife is just getting weird. I can't even have fun at Limelight."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, to be honest, it's never really been my venue of choice. Too much 'freaky for freaky sake' and not enough 'freaky.' That whole group of club kids. They really just try too hard. I've been thinking about it ever since Angel died."

"Wait. You told me about him. Was it an overdose?"

"An overdose of Michael Alig! Angel didn't even do drugs; he just sold them. Then Michael and Freeze up and killed Angel, chopped him up and threw him in the river. But the police finally figured it all out, and now Michael's in jail. Which is probably more fun than clubs these days anyway."

"You're obviously exaggerating."

"Not really, swirlysnooch. It used to be we'd just walk in the front door. Then we had to start going in through the Twentieth Street entrance. Now there's no VIP entrance at all and we have to go in with the cattle. They make us wait in line to be patted down in the most unflirtatious way. I even saw them shake down some poor tranny's wig. She should've hid razors in that 'fro."

"Oh! Like Foxy Brown?"

"Coffy, actually. Anyway, we did the usual survey of the main floor, checked out the side and then headed our way upstairs. It was surreal. What used to be too packed was just a big empty room. Even the backroom where guys used to stick their dicks into the holes of a box that allegedly housed some random homeless drag queen? Empty."

"Well, there's always shifts in venues. One place goes out of favor and a new one rises."

"No, there's a more than a shift happening. Giuliani has this whole crackdown on fun going on while he's supposedly sticking his dick into somebody other than his wife. You know how moralistic hypocrites can be, right? But it's more than just that. New places that are opening are filled with tables and chairs and smaller dance floors. I saw my friend JonEd working the VIP door at one of the new places and she said we couldn't go in unless we bought a bottle of Absolut. For, like, $300! All these changes—it's like I'm suddenly in Atlanta. It's making me go a little crazy I think."

"Change can bring out weird feelings. And you sound, well, a little emotional. Are you that upset?"

"It's not just nightlife. It's, well, everything. I'm... I'm just afraid."

"You? But you're fearless. What could you be afraid of?"

"I call you week after week. For months now and it seems like everything I ever tell you about. Every important thing in my life is either gone or forgotten. All just things of The Past."

"That still doesn't explain what could scare you."

"Too be honest, it's you. I'm afraid of becoming you."

"Hey, I'm not that bad a thing to become! I still can... Hold on, I have another call... Hello?"

"Es salaam aleikum, giga-glans! I've been wanting to call you for years! This is The Future."

Previously: Past Over