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the riches
Subprime Crisis Hits Those Who Created It
While the merely superrich have been unable to sell or buy homes in the Hamptons for some time now, the mega-rich have continued purchasing giant estates for absurd prices. But as Vanity Fair explains, no more! Now there is precisely one man rich enough to buy a Southhampton property for an insanely inflated price, and he is the man who predicted and bet on the subprime crisis taking the toll it has. Now former Bear Stearns employees are worried about their mortgages, JUST LIKE REAL POOR PEOPLE, and it's all very, very, very sad. Listen to just how sad it is! More »
the rich
Exclusive Hamptons Social Networking Site Letting the Wrong Kinds of People In Already
The Hamptons are always of interest. Why? Because rich people and social strivers go there! Hamptons Undercover, an "exclusive networking and resource site dedicated solely" to the summering spot, will help you get your foot in the door. More »
open caption
Television Star Surrounded By Her Core Demographic
[Blake Lively filming "Gossip Girl" (because, really, why stop now) on Tilden Beach in the Hamptons today; image via INF]
shut up, rich people
Emily Brill's Harrowing Escape From New York
As long as we're piling on millionaire media celebrities today, here's the latest video blog clown show from Emily Brill. In the video Brill, the daughter of media mogul Steve, is traveling yet again to the Hamptons (a fact we're reminded of many, many times) with magazine person Devorah Rose and a silly little dog. They're in Em's Lexus, which she's driving in Manhattan for the first time. The dizzy duo is a bit lost and confused when trying to leave the island Manhattan (Emily about the Triborough Bridge: "Wait does that go to another borough?") and all they can tell is that they're heading toward the Beatrice Inn ("like, downtown.") Then! Yay! They find the tunnel and Emily just cannot believe that her car is going to Queens. Over and over again she says it! Filthy horrid Queens! Her precious car! Blahhh blah blah blah. Oh, and then Devorah calls herself "useless." Sigh. Silly Thursday afternoon video fun after the jump. More »
who makes the nazis
Antisemitism: Cool Again!
When we were young, we assumed "The Hamptons" had something to do with a cartoon pig—now we are older and wiser and we know that it's a place on Long Island where rich people go, even though they can surely afford to go somewhere other than Long Island. Turns out, they're just going there to get away from all the goddamn Jews! More »
town hell
Remember the story of the terribly racist "humor" column in the Hamptons Independent last week? It upset famed blogger Alec Baldwin! Baldwin wrote about the column earlier this week (and then again!) as an example of "how the Obama ascendancy is playing out in Small Town America." Leaving aside the fact that the Hamptons are "small town America" only if you are a time traveler from the 17th century, the column was idiotic and well worth piling on. BUT! Maybe Alec had an ulterior motive for singling out this particular piece of regrettable small-market bullshit for a very public flaying! Maybe Alec has some personal beef with the gentleman that wrote the column—the paper's editor, Rick Murphy. Maybe because Baldwin is involved with the East Hampton Democrats, who don't particularly get along with Murphy! Maybe Murphy mocked Alec's letters to the editor! And maybe Rick Murphy's wife left a long comment to that effect at HuffPo—a comment which mysteriously failed to appear! After the jump, Alec Baldwin's "Small town" Hamptons intrigue.
More »
Alec Baldwin Just Fighting With Hamptons Neighbors At HuffPo
Remember the story of the terribly racist "humor" column in the Hamptons Independent last week? It upset famed blogger Alec Baldwin! Baldwin wrote about the column earlier this week (and then again!) as an example of "how the Obama ascendancy is playing out in Small Town America." Leaving aside the fact that the Hamptons are "small town America" only if you are a time traveler from the 17th century, the column was idiotic and well worth piling on. BUT! Maybe Alec had an ulterior motive for singling out this particular piece of regrettable small-market bullshit for a very public flaying! Maybe Alec has some personal beef with the gentleman that wrote the column—the paper's editor, Rick Murphy. Maybe because Baldwin is involved with the East Hampton Democrats, who don't particularly get along with Murphy! Maybe Murphy mocked Alec's letters to the editor! And maybe Rick Murphy's wife left a long comment to that effect at HuffPo—a comment which mysteriously failed to appear! After the jump, Alec Baldwin's "Small town" Hamptons intrigue.
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and now he's dead
Bobby Van, 64, Dies In A Cab
Bobby Van, the Juilliard School dropout and owner of Bobby Van's Steakhouse in Bridgehampton, died on Tuesday. He was 64 and working as a cab driver in Huntington, Long Island. For a while, in the 70s and 80s, Bobby Van was the Hamptons' Elaine Kaufman. According to Steven Gaines' great book on the Hamptons, Philistines at the Hedgerow, his restaurant-saloon was "an oasis of warmth and country bonhomie in the bleakness of the gray Hamptons winter." It was also where Truman Capote, James Jones, Kurt Vonnegut and Willie Morris used to get shitfaced. And where shady and deposed real estate kingAllan Schneider did most of his business. According to Page Six, "Van's ex-wife, Marina, had him cremated with no service and no announcement."
the best tabloid story ever
Crazed Gay's Crazed Gunman Wants His Baby!
Those born after 1975 probably won't remember New York's greatest and most tabloidiest gay, Andrew Crispo. He was a hoity-toity art dealer and sadomasochist who was—the week after he left prison for tax evasion!—the victim of a blown-up Hamptons home which happily provided him with a $5-million settlement. He would later go on to threaten to kidnap one of his own lawyer's children. Also, in the 80s, this guy who worked for him shot a kid that Crispo had met at the Hellfire Club. Now that guy is still in prison—while Crispo is laying pretty low—but the shooter has managed to have a baby—but his nutcase prison wife is divorcing him and trying to take his baby! More »
yom kippur
Dear Kristian, Dear Moby, Dear Braden Keil
Each year (or really, every 11 months and two weeks or so, kinda), the Jews observe Yom Kippur, the day of atonement, during which leather shoes and doing it are totally forbidden. Then there are many apologies. Let it begin with us! Josh is up first because he's the Jewiest. More »
how the other half lives
Last night "Extra" took a rare tour of P. Diddy's (or whatever he's calling himself these days) elegant Hamptons manse. It's a humble, almost sparse layout, which stuns the perky reporter. "Everything's white!" she exclaims. Well, you know, almost everything.
Welcome To Diddy's White House
Last night "Extra" took a rare tour of P. Diddy's (or whatever he's calling himself these days) elegant Hamptons manse. It's a humble, almost sparse layout, which stuns the perky reporter. "Everything's white!" she exclaims. Well, you know, almost everything.
bellport
Si Newhouse's Lawn
Advance Publications chairman S.I. Newhouse—Conde Nast's big honcho—and his wife live on three adjacent lots in Bellport, Long Island, on South Howell's Point Road. The lawn proper is guarded by a little wooden gate at the road. As we unlatched it the other day, we pondered the legality of our actions—but we were accompanied by Eddie Hayes, the New York lawyer who's defended Jon Gotti, the mafia cops and Andy Warhol's legacy, so we thought we'd be okay. It turns out that Si Newhouse's grass is short, lush and well-kept. Surprised? More »
Hamptons weather this Labor Day weekend: Gorgeous, 50% humidity, only 10% chance of rain, sunsets circa 7:20 p.m., waves around two feet, and 100% chance of screaming assholes with even louder children backed up for miles along the highway. Enjoy that!
the hamptons
The Hamptons Townies Speak
Around 1 a.m. today we got an email from one of the Hamptons kids that we wrote about on our last trip to the East End. (They were hanging out downtown when we met them, getting the hairy eyeball from uptight New York summer Hamptons people.) We're publishing it for a couple of reasons. First of all, it's a benefit of this medium that we get to have subjects of stories respond; if Google News can do it, why not us? And also, because we pretty much agree with it! More »
the hamptons
Goodbye Forever, Ye Hamptons
I arrived into the town of Southampton late in the summer (two weeks ago) armed only with some class-consciousness, a copy of The Great Gatsby stolen from the Hennepin County Library and a rotating cast of photographers. First Laurel Ptak and later Amelia Bauer made the slog eastward with me. Here are our favorite photographs, some seen here for the very first time.More »
people to know
Inside "The Blue Book Of The Hamptons"
When we tried to order "The Blue Book" out at BookHampton, we were told that because of a New York Times article, the world's schmanciest phone book was all sold out. Allegedly. "Write down your name," the man said. "We'll call you." As I wrote my name down on a note card, I noticed the clerk's eyes narrow as each of my Jewy names spilled onto the neat white paper. "Uh-huh," he said," we'll call you." But they did! Affirmative action! The book showed up at our office in a plain white envelope. At $70 it is the most expensive phone book maybe ever. It's a phonebook full of people to whom really you'd have nothing to say. It is beautifully cloth-bound with elegant gold cursive on the front. It smells like fresh paper bills. More »
beat the rich
Remembering Katrina And Rita In East Hampton
We had but one reason for revisiting Main Beach in East Hampton over the weekend—we wanted to see if our favorite scorched old man was there. He was! Eating chicken salad from a Tupperware container all alone! But we're glad we did hit the waves once more. The tide was coming in, you see, and the wealthy families had to erect makeshift sand levees to protect their Martha's Vineyard towels and scattered copies of Hamptons Style. One found this the perfect opportunity to pay homage to the courage and resilience of their fellow Americans who were affected by Hurricane Katrina by inscribing "The 9th Ward" into their makeshift levee. Get it? New Orleans? 1,836 people died! Hilarious! Pass the Bloody Mary mix, Bunny, and move the beach chair, the tides comin' in! Amelia Bauer held the camera steady.
the hamptons
If burgers and barbecues represent the best the Hamptons have to offer, then clubs like the Star Room, Dune and the Pink Elephant represent the Hamptons at their wondrous and strange worst. These nightclubs remind us of the beginning scenes of the Warriors when all the gangs gather in Van Cortland Park. Amelia Bauer caught the glory and the agony on film.
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Inside The Star Room
If burgers and barbecues represent the best the Hamptons have to offer, then clubs like the Star Room, Dune and the Pink Elephant represent the Hamptons at their wondrous and strange worst. These nightclubs remind us of the beginning scenes of the Warriors when all the gangs gather in Van Cortland Park. Amelia Bauer caught the glory and the agony on film.
More »
