Gawker: The New York Post

What's the Post's Problem with Aretha Franklin?

ian spiegelman — Sat, 12 Apr 2008 14:20:53 EDT

First, someone at The New York Post selected this open-mouthed photo of Aretha Franklin to illustrate a tiny item about the singer in today's Page Six online. Then, some Sixer began said item with, "PAPS, get your wide lenses ready—Aretha Franklin is coming to the Hamptons this summer!" In the next sentence, Franklin is referred to as "The large and in-charge diva." Okay, we get it: Someone, or several someones, at the often thuggish paper doesn't like the singer and wants to point out that she's fat and demanding. Except, the rest of the item is pretty obviously a space-filling favor drop for Franklin's own agent.

"The large and in-charge diva's agent, Ruth Bowen, told her pal Page Morton Black that Franklin has rented a home in Westhampton for two weeks in July. Bowen and Black—the chairman of the Parkinson's Disease Foundation—seemed almost as excited by the news as they were about the Parkinson's annual fund-raiser May 14 at The Pierre hotel." Is this evidence that over-exposure to celebrity gossip can occasionally screw your shit all up? Or is this some passive-aggressive mindfuck between Franklin and her agent? I simply do not know. [P6]

Malcolm Gladwelling at The Post

ian spiegelman — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 15:18:32 EDT

Super-famous New Yorker writer and liar Malcolm Gladwell isn't the only reporter who tried to sneak funny bits of prose into his articles for a respected newspaper. (Except didn't he not do that? I'm confused.) Anyhoo, it's a fun old game to play, and we used to play it Page Six. My fellow former Sixer Chris Wilson and I used to daydream about getting the term "Bukkake Bandit" onto the page, which, in 2003/2004, was no easy trick. In fact, it never even got past Richard Johnson. Another crusade was to get the Google definition of Senator Rick Santorum's name into the Post back when that was still new and fun.

We came close once. Richard was on vacation and Wilson typed up what we thought was surely a family-friendly way of explaining the Santorum gag to unplugged newspaper readers. At about 7:00 p.m., we were all set to leave, when Post executive editor Steve Cuozzo—the Old Timiest of the Old Timey newsmen—came tearing out of his office, yowling, "Frothy discharge? Frothy discharge!?" Long story short: item killed.

What else do I miss about the Post? This lady right here. ::Sigh::

You Have to Hand it to Them

ian spiegelman — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 14:47:26 EDT

Whatever your feelings toward the New York Post, the feisty tab sure does have a way with headlines. And, of course, Page Six has no problem boasting about it—or cross-promoting tasty corporate products. Harper Entertainment, which, like the Post, is owned by monolithic News Corp., is publishing Headless Body in Topless Bar, a celebration of some of the paper's greatest hits. Page Six's top picks after the jump.

"Kiss Your Asteroid Goodbye" (a runaway star possibly hitting the Earth)
"Jiggle All the Way" (husbands giving their wives boob jobs for Christmas)
"Bimbo Summit" (Lindsay, Paris and Britney partying together)
"Good Noose" (Saddam Hussen sentenced to hang)
"Wacko Jacko Backo" (a Michael Jackson comeback)
"Bite of the Century" (Mike Tyson chewing off part of Evander Holyfield's ear)
The 1982 incident that gave birth to the most famous headline of all, "concerned a Queens strip club where the bartender was shot dead and his head cut off. (The killer didn't want to leave the embedded bullet behind.)" [P6]